All men are created equal; we don’t stay that way
Didn’t watch the Oscars last night. Just not my thing. But I did manage to catch the very end of it where they’re singing a song to the “losers.” Found that interesting.
Because, I don’t know if you noticed, but they never say: And the winner is… like they used to; now they only say: And the Oscar goes to… .
The reason is obvious, they don’t want anyone’s feelings to get hurt. But that doesn’t change the fact that there are, indeed, winners and losers in life.
Which brings me to a friend of mine. Like most people, he only knows part of a saying and not the whole thing: It’s not just that “Curiosity killed the cat,” the saying finishes: “Satisfaction brought him back.”
That means the saying is exactly the opposite of what most people think it is.
It’s only after the cat’s curiosity is satisfied that he’s made whole again. Without satisfaction, curiosity was killing him.
As for my friend. He thinks the saying is, Everyone is equal. That is not the saying. People are decidedly not equal.
99.99% of the course of your life depends on the parents to whom you are born.
All men/people are created equal, but time, tide, and effort means that no one stays that way.
I have been wrasslin for over a decade now, on and off. I’m terrible.
However, I’m a pretty good fencer. Certainly not the best, but definitely not the worst. And the reasons for the two are the same: time, tide, and effort.
Put in much more time at being a good fencer than I did at being a good wrestler and my injuries mean that I can still fence but not wrassle.
Getting back to my friend, he’s also my fencing student but refuses to show me the proper respect as his instructor. That’s forgivable to an extent because he’s my friend.
But the moment he even hinted at disrespect for my instructor, I had to ask him to stop coming.
He had an easy out: apologize, pay a fine, and we could all move on with our lives.
And yet, he refused.
He only knows me as his drinking buddy Logan, his equal. And when we drink, we are. But put a weapon in my hand and I’m far and away not his equal.
And the reason is simple: I earned it, I worked for it.
The problem is the same with the Oscars, with the the soccer trophies everyone wins for just showing up, and him.
They confuse equality to equality of effort. They are not the same.
The other issue is that the other students have been part of other schools, and teams with coaches. They understand that they submit to the will of the instructor for two reasons: (a) safety and (b) to get better.
He does not understand this. At some point, one earns the right to be treated as an equal but he has not – not yet in this arena at least. I’m disappointed in both him and the situation.
To excel in something, one must bend. The winners in life are not the ones that futility fight everything but the ones that bend, learn, and come back for more.
If I had to rename this blog from On (or close to) Schedule, it would be to: If you can be anything, be bendy. I’ve said it a million times to him and everyone else.
We face a choice daily to be broken or be bendy; those that consistently choose the latter are the ones that survive and excel.
The door is always open for him, if he’s willing to pay the price of admission.
And a major part of the price is to shut up and learn from someone that did just that.
Mood: disappointed
Music: I won’t be coming this way again. Burn them bridges down
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5 replies on “People used to say “And the winner is…” not “And the Oscar goes to…””
I think the change in wording was all about asserting the brand, not about suggesting that everyone else who didn’t win is still a winner. Of course, in a very real sense, the other nominees are at the top of the crop, but there is one winner.
I think that branding certainly had something to do with it, but I do recall reading somewhere (and I wish I could find it to provide a cite) that they also wanted to reduce some bruised egos. I think they both have merit.
But yes, these are the cream of the crop in their field.
[…] Simply put, it’s when being kind is the worst thing one can be. The Dahmer story is an extreme example but it’s an almost daily occurrence – like soccer trophies for just showing up. […]
[…] There’s no shame in losing. There’s shame in trying to take something you didn’t earn. […]
[…] We should get a goddamn Oscar. […]