A daiquiri is not a frozen daiquiri

A daiquiri is completely different than a frozen daiquiri – also a pic of me with a hi-top fade

Her: What the…?
Me: Well, I did ask for a hightop fade.
Her: You did?
Me: Of course I didn’t! Look at me! I look like Kid from Kid ‘n Play.

Because of the insane heat in New York the past few weeks, been trying to do whatever I could to keep cool.

One thing was to go out with my buddy PB to a place around me called the Gin Mill and ask for a daquiri.

Like always, the waitress said, “We don’t have a blender.”

For pete’s … let’s clear up something right now: A daiquiri is as different from a frozen daiquiri as a yogurt is from frozen yogurt. As different as chocolate is from hot chocolate.

They’re completely different things.

Don’t know when it started that people think that the only daiquiris that exist are the frozen kind. At it’s most basic, a daiquiri is limeade and rum. That’s it.

Caipirinha, a Brazilian daiquiri
Caipirinha – essentially a daiquiri with sugercane rum.

Here’s my version of it:

  • Shot of light rum
  • Juice of one-half lime
  • 1/3 to 1/2 shot of sugar syrup or agave
  • Ice-filled glass
  • Top off with seltzer or water

And when it comes to beating the heat, that plus a fan is the classic way to do it.

A recent Esquire article titled, In Defense of the Daiquiri had the exact same issue with the blender and noted that, “It’s one of those cocktails that’s hard to make well because you can’t hide.”

I’ll tell people that’s why I drink them.

But that’s a lie.

You and I know that the real reason is that I just like to get rum into my fat belly.

Her: Oh, it doesn’t look that bad. Bring your big head over here.
Me: Hey…
Her: (hugging my head) It’ll grow back. (thinking) What’s the circumference of this thing?

Kid 'n' Play

Location: 21:00 yest, thrust, parry, thrust on the UWS
Mood: tired
Music: Pretend the water is champagne and fill my glass again and again
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12 thoughts on “A daiquiri is not a frozen daiquiri”

  1. it’s not that bad. i think it can be easily fixed, or just wait till your next scheduled cut. no big deal, it’s just hair. hey, instead of an AC unit, have you tried a GU (ghetto unit)? place about 4 frozen water bottles in front of a fan and turn it on. i haven’t personally tried it (I would if I didn’t have AC), but i know people who swear by it!

    1. It’s grown out for the most part but the first few days were laughably bad. Man! I swear, it whenever I leave my usual guy to save a few bucks.

      I’ve never tried that but I should; we have AC units but they’re super loud and inefficient. That plus I feel like it’s wasteful – but two weeks ago when the temps hit a 100, I was cranking that thing on like crazy.
      Logan Lo recently posted…A daiquiri is not a frozen daiquiriMy Profile

    1. You should give it a whirl! Super simple and so refreshing on a hot day. I actually put in a lot of water and very little rum if I know I just want to keep it light.

      So good – wish I had one now…

  2. As a bartender, I approve this message.

    Hell, I have customs that think when they order a Pina Colada, they’re going to get something frozen.

    *grumpy cat face.jpeg*

      1. I did not know you bartend! Well, that’s something new.

        I love a good pina colada but it’s impossible to find someone that knows how to make one well. And – as you know – they think that I expect it to be frozen. It’s a pox, I tell you!

        Are you finding that more people are ordering rum? As I speak to people, I’m finding that they are but I don’t know if that’s because I’m looking for fellow rum drinkers or not.

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