Telling tales

My life/blog has become very self-referential

My life/blog has turned oddly self-referential in that, when people want to know what I’m up to, I point them towards this but then again, some of those interactions become part of the blog. It’s hard to explain and I’m a bit muddle-headed these days so I’m not going to attempt to clarify further.

Thought of this because I got a phone call recently asking what I was up to. I, of course, pointed him here. Afterwards, he called me back and we had another conversation that reminded of an old MASH skit regarding this:

Him: So what happened?
Me: I don’t kiss and tell.
Him: Did you kiss?
Me: Can’t you tell?

Location: at a kitchen table in Queens, piled with books
Mood: working
Music: a different corner and we never would have met

St. Val

What makes a date a date? Food?

Got a date for St. Val’s day tomorrow. I’ve been on dates before, yes, but I’m really looking forward to this one.

Did you ever read Miss Manners? I’ve got lots of issues (admittedly) but poor manners isn’t one of them. On that note, here’s her view on what a date is comprised of:

There are three possible parts to a date, of which at least two must be offered: entertainment, food, and affection. It is customary to begin a series of dates with a great deal of entertainment, a moderate amount of food, and the merest suggestion of affection. As the amount of affection increases, the entertainment can be reduced proportionately. When the affection IS the entertainment, we no longer call it dating. Under no circumstances can the food be omitted. — Miss Manners’ Guide to Excruciatingly Correct Behavior

Think I’ve got the entertainment and food part down.

If I manage to get some sleep the night before, I might be normal enough to work in some affection.

Who am I kidding? I’ll settle for the food and entertainment.

Location: Yonkers, New York
Mood: curious
Music: every time I try to make it right, it all comes down on me

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Laugh it up

It’s easy to go broke dating in NYC

Went to a comedy club recently with the blue-jean eyed girl.

It was good, it included Gabriel Iglesias from Last Comic Standing, who was great.

But what a scam – basically, it’s a $20 cover, two drink minimum ($24) with an automatic 18% gratuity. For two people with just a plate of appetizers, it worked out to be $150.

Counting cab rides, subway rides, and daily miscellany, the day would have easily been $200+.

All I can say is, man, there’s no quicker way to go broke than just trying to entertain yourself in the big city so that you don’t go postal.

That’s why I spend Sunday through Thursday eating cold sandwiches and drinking tap water.

Mmm…tap water…

Location: @6AM, yawning on a futon
Mood: busy
Music: I shouldn’t have done it, and it won’t forgive me

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15 Important Questions – Part 1

Questions you should ask in a relationship before you get serious

My brother sent me this article from the NY Times called: Questions Couples Should Ask (Or Wish They Had) Before Marrying. Even though it’s one in the morning, I’m going to answer the first five. I’ll answer the rest in another post.

1) Have we discussed whether or not to have children, and if the answer is yes, who is going to be the primary care giver?

  • I need to have kids. Three ideally.
  • I would like to stay home and take care of the kids because:
  1. I make enough money working from home to survive, nay flourish (ok, survive) for seven years in Manhattan
  2. I’m constantly cooking and am willing to mash anything for them
  3. I’m a big kid myself

2) Do we have a clear idea of each other’s financial obligations and goals, and do our ideas about spending and saving mesh?

  • I’m a firm believer in fiscal responsibility (see 1, above).
  • I rarely cab, and walk whenever possible
  • While I love to cook, I do like to go out about two times a week. I’m much more local restaurant than five-star, hot-place-of-the-week.

3) Have we discussed our expectations for how the household will be maintained, and are we in agreement on who will manage the chores?

  • I’m messy but oddly germ-a-phobic.
  • No shoes in the house.
  • No dirty clothes on the bed
  • We would swap chores weekly
  • I can’t stand dirty dishes in the sink.

4) Have we fully disclosed our health histories, both physical and mental?

  • Clearly, I’m a bit nuts. I put my entire life on my blog that no one reads (but you – hey, thanx!)
  • I’m an insomniac and have been for at least two decades. It means I get moody and irritable and may lash out (never physically but I do yell). Please ignore and take a walk or encourage me to. It’ll all work out.
  • I have been depressed before – actually, if you’ve been reading this blog, you know all this.

5) Is my partner affectionate to the degree that I expect?

  • Ah, look at the time! Gotta run – sorry…

Location: @12:05, on the A Train at Broadway-Lafayette
Mood: accomplished
Music: Aus der Uhr tropfen Sekunden weit und breit kein

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