Month: December 2023

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personal

Happy New Year, 2024!

Wrestling with Angels

Was planning on writing this whole entry about my trip to Vienna but I thought I’d take a little sidetrack to wish you all a Happy New Year.

The Firecracker and I went to the Albertina Museum and saw the Michelangelo and Beyond exhibit and saw a whole buncha things that I could tell you about.

But the thing that stuck with me was the sculpture called The Wrestlers, which is actually not by Michelangelo but by an unknown Roman sculptor.

This is actually a copy but still…

The interesting thing about this sculpture is that it’s a pretty common move even today called the “cross-body ride,” and the top wrestler would probably move to a position called a twister or a guillotine.

You can see a ton of modern examples of this on YouTube.

Now, a decade ago, I wrote about Jacob wrestling the angel and, just like that wrestling move, a lotta what I wrote there is still applicable now.

I find wrestling such an interesting activity because – like the dumpling – every nation has its own version.

Because it’s such a human thing to do; it’s a hallmark of our very species.

Not just literally but figuratively as well. I think I’ve spent the last several years wrestling with my demons and still do.

Woulda been a lot more impressed with this sculpture if the artist put in cauliflower ears like the Greek Boxer of the Quirinal.

Still, we all wrestle with our fate and hope to overcome. One day we’ll be overcome ourselves.

I’m 50 now and I’ll be 51 in 2024.

Dunno how much longer I can actually wassle. But I hope that I’ma scuffle and struggle until I’m breathless and weak – both literally and figuratively.

Hope you do as well.

Here’s to the new year, everyone!

Location: yesterday, at a Viennese cafe with the Firecracker
Mood: missing the boy
Music: In the locust wind comes a rattle and hum; Jacob wrestled the angel and the angel was overcome (Spotify)
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Christmas 2023

Taco Cat Goat Cheese Pizza

The very next day, the kid and I hopped a train to NJ to see my in-laws.

Just like every year, we spend Christmas Eve into Christmas with them – and this year, my sister-in-law was there as well.

Me: Oh, I didn’t know she was coming – I haven’t seen her in ages.
MIL: Yeah, she’s coming early so she can see everyone.
Me: That’s great! It’ll be good to see her.

The kid was, of course, bouncing off the walls with excitement for the following day. But he did manage to settle down enough to have some dinner.

My sister-in-law came but forgot something at home, so I offered to run out and grab it for her since she was beat – I always like to drive when I can since I don’t do it that often anymore.

Afterward, we played some Taco Cat Goat Cheese Pizza, a card game we have at home but never got around to opening. It was a lot more fun than I had expected.

His dessert was some fresh, homemade cookies.

The next day, the kid got up early but had to wait until 9AM to open presents.

I gotta say that he was super patient, which is something I’m always happy for with him.

Him: (opening one particular gift) This is just what I wanted! How did he know?
Me: Santa? I suppose he knows all this stuff.

I know I won’t have much more time with him believing in Santa Claus so I’m gonna enjoy it while it lasts.

All my in-laws got me gifts, which I really appreciated – including my sister-in-law, who bought me some cannabis, knowing the issues I have with sleeping. It was very thoughtful of her.

I felt bad I didn’t get her anything but, in my defense, I didn’t know that she was coming. She didn’t mind at all, though.

Afterward, my mother-in-law packed me this awesome lunch because I had to run and catch a train.

Unlike last year, where I had to catch a train to fix a boiler, this time, I had to catch a train for much (much) better reasons.

Him: Do you have to go?
Me: I gotta run, kiddo. [The Firecracker’s] waiting for me at Penn Station.
Him: (nodding) OK, papa.
Me: I’ll call you when I can, ok?
Him: OK! Have fun in Vienna!

Location: a white room in Vienna with black framed walls, looking over the foggy city
Mood: caffeinated
Music: I’ll give it to someone special (Spotify)
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A traditional Chinese-American Christmas meal of Mexican food

Something different for everyone

The neighborhood’s been in full holiday swing this past month.

There were some carolers that were singing outside one of my usual supermarkets, which was a cool little things for the neighborhood.

The Firecracker’s sister and brother-in-law were supposed by with their kid again for a pre-Christmas dinner so we did a lotta planning, including for me to really spend some time in our local (tiny) Japanese food mart around the way.

Unfortunately, her brother-in-law got sick.

Firecracker: On no, now their kid’s sick.
Me: Oh man, that stinks. We should cancel getting together otherwise, everyone’s gonna have a miserable Christmas.
Her: Yeah, she thinks the same.

So, we ended up having some pretty quiet Christmas plans; the Firecracker really wanted to see some Christmas lights but I was beat and so were the kids.

She was definitely a good sport about not going but I convinced the boys and myself to rally and head out with her to see some lights in Lincoln Center that was activated by noise.

The kids liked it because they had a good reason to scream on the top of their lungs in the middle of Manhattan. And the Firecracker liked it because she just wanted to do something festive with alla us.

Afterwards, we decided to walk along Columbus home trying to figure out what to do.

We ultimately found a cozy little Mexican restaurant that had margaritas so we went there.

Me: Nothing like a traditional Chinese-American Christmas meal of Mexican food.

But, honestly, it was better than anything we coulda planned.

Afterward, because we all had other obligations for Christmas Day, we all exchanged gifts that night.

It was something different for everyone, which makes sense, because this whole thing is something different for everyone.

Location: a Christmas market
Mood: proud
Music: Next year all our troubles, will be out of sight (Spotify)
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Happy Christmas 2023!

Merry Chrithmith!

Hope you’re all having a lovely and peaceful holiday!

Happy Christmas Chrithmith from the Lo’s!

Location: a room with family in New Jersey and the kid tucked in bed waiting for St. Nick
Mood: stuffed
Music: Have yourself a merry little Christmas (Spotify)
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Sorry I’m late, what’s the topic of conversation?

Two Christmas Office Parties

This Christmas season’s been different from the past few years.

For one thing, I’m just a longer way away from 2017, which is when everything went to hell.

But the Firecracker’s also been really good about pulling me out into the world this season.

She actually had her holiday office party in the neighborhood and dropped me a line.

Her: At the Dakota Bar.
Me: I could swing by to say “hi” for a second after I drop the kid off if you’re still there?
Her: Yes, please.

This was a different group of people than I met in the past, so it was interesting meeting these different people that she worked with.

Me: Sorry I’m late, what’s the topic of conversation?
Someone at table: We’re just talking shit about people we know.
Me: I’m a guest here so I’ll talk shit about anyone you’d like. Fuck those guys. Hi, I’m Logan.

One of her coworkers ended up buying me two drinks, so that was pretty nice.

One young lady was pretty dedicated to her job but you could tell it was draining her.

Me: What’s the biggest issue?
Her: (waving hand) What do you see here?
Me: (puzzled) Your hand?
Her: Yup, my hand. No ring, no guy, just the job. It’s exhausting.
Me: Oh, there’s someone out there for you; I believe there’s a lid for every pot.

Afterward, I went to get the kid and headed home.

A few days later, I got invited to my own law firm party at Capital Grille at the Chrysler Center – we’d been there a few times before.

On the way there, I ran into the Grinch on a powered tricycle.

Swear to god, it does NOT sound like she’s saying, “pumpkin pie,” in this video.

I was late to my own office party because I had to drop off the kid with his Chinese class, so I came in while everyone was already settled.

Me: Sorry I’m late, what’s the topic of conversation?

I ordered my usual Old Fashioned – it’s my go-to when I know they don’t have fine aged rum.

They already ordered a ton of appetizers and I ordered what was essentially a surf and turf.

The Firecracker had, evidently, called me a number of times.

Her: You need to answer your phone. They won’t release [your kid] to me.
Me: I’m so sorry, it was in my jacket.
Her: [It’s fine], I have him.

The firm hired a new lawyer that practiced the same area of the law as me and this was the first time we got to talking outside of work.

Me: I assume you met your girl the traditional way of some app?
Him: (laughing) Yup.
Me: Honestly, I like it. You can’t just walk into a bar and ask any rando you meet for a head shot and a writing sample.
Co-Worker: The writing sample’s so important.
Me: SO important.

Everyone else left so it was just the boss and me drinking in the end.

There’s a lot more to that part of the story but I’ll just end that part here.

Location: home, doing word problems with the kid who was losing his patience
Mood: chilly willy
Music: Later we’ll have some PUMPKIN pie and we’ll do some caroling (Spotify)
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Music Together

My Son’s First Recital

So many people did so many things for Alison, me, and the kid when she first got sick.

But there’s a story I don’t think I ever told you about which is this small little group called Music Together and this woman named Deanna DeCampos.

My memory is completely fuzzy during this time but she somehow heard about Alison and me and offered for me to take the kid there. I only went a few times because I was busy so with Alison but we had sitters that brought the kid there the whole time that Alison was sick.

It was such a godsend to have some place for him to go and be happy.

And when Alison died, they kept saying the kid should continue to come but, after a while, I felt I was taking advantage of their generosity so I eventually stopped but a huge part of the kid’s insane love of music is because of them.

Now, I’ve only ever shown his face once in this blog, and this is the second time. He’s the munchkin in the front – he was maybe just two years old here.

I honestly think that a major reason why the kid never felt the unbelievable sadness of what was going on with Alison was because of the joy of music that Music Together gave him.

So, if you’re in NYC and want to support a wonderful organization with some amazing instructors and have your kid love music as much as mine does, drop them a line.

I cannot recommend them highly enough.

Speaking of the kid’s love of music, he had his very first recital the other night with his guitar teacher.

He was the only kid that both played an instrument and sang a song at the same time.

I was am super proud.

He def needs to sing louder – but I was still a proud papa.

Afterward, I brought the Firecracker and both kids to that Irish pub because (a) I was in the mood for some good fish and chips and (b) I wanted to thank the bartender for finding my iPad and stuff.

Wrote about the bar a while ago.

He def needs to sing louder – but I was still a proud papa.

Got the kid a burger but the rest of us had some killer fish and chips – beer battered not breaded.

Alison always wanted him to learn the violin and I do my darndest to try to respect her wishes but I couldn’t imagine the thought of years of screeching before he got good.

Then again, he’s been a natural with music thanks to Music Together so maybe it wouldn’tve been that bad.

Him: Did you hear people singing the song when I was singing?!
Me: I did!
Him: That was so cool!
Me: It was. (turning and whispering to the Firecracker) Hopefully, he’ll wanna go to med school or law school, though.
Her: Oh, hush, Lo.

Location: at a swimming pool, writing this and trying not to get splashed.
Mood: proud
Music: Tell me why, ain’t nothin’ but a heartache (Spotify)
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NYC’s Holiday Nostalgia Ride

NYC Rocks

The next morning, I was getting the kid ready to go to his guitar lesson when I realized that I didn’t have my iPad…or even my bag.

Me: Shoot, I think I left it at one of the bars last night. I’ve gotta bring the kid to his guitar practice, can you ring up the bars and see if they found it?
Her: Oh no! OK, I’ll call them.

Actually managed to stop by the first bar to see if they had it but they didn’t. And the Firecracker said that the bartender for the second bar wouldn’t be in until after 6PM, so there wasn’t much to do but wait and hope.

So, after I dropped him off, I walked back with another parent when we saw these people queuing for a movie giveaway.

Me: Let’s check that out?
Him: Sure!

With that, I got the Firecracker both a tote and a hot chocolate, courtesy of the film, Poor Things.

Now, the thing about dating the Firecracker is that she’s all-in when it comes to holiday family activities. She has these annual traditions with her and her kid that she invites my kid and me to join.

Her: You should come, Lo. It’ll be like the trains you rode when you were a kid.
Me: (grumble)

Invariably, they’re something that I thought about bringing the kid to myself but never got around to doing.

Like The Holiday Train Show in the Bronx.

Well, turns out that there’s another holiday train thingy – her kid’s really into trains – that they would go on together, and that’s the Holiday Nostalgia Ride, where really archaic trains are taken outta storage and put back into service for a blast from the past.

So, after I picked up the kid from his guitar lesson, we dashed off to 145th Street to board the nostalgia train.

We arrived at the station with less than two minutes to spare and just made the train.

Gotta say, it was pretty cool.

The maps were the original old subway maps…

…as well as the old ads and old signs…

…even the old fans…

…and old wicker seats.

Now, while I found the whole thing pretty cool, one of the kids did not and had a meltdown during the trip.

The thing with dealing with her kid and my kid is that they both trade meltdowns – sometimes it’s my kid melting down, sometimes it’s hers.

Most of the time, it has something to do with the fact that they’ve both grown up as only kids and aren’t used to having to deal with another kid. Her kid is two years older than mine, so he’s had two additional years of not dealing with another kid to boot.

In any case, one of them had a meltdown this day so the rest of the night was less than ideal.

But then the next day, things were pretty much back to normal.

I suppose any relationship – adult or child – has to deal with some growing pains.

Here’s hoping we all work it out ok.

Oh, speaking of working out ok, I found my iPad!

The bartender at one of the bars I went to put it away for me.

Him: I looked inside and figured you’d come back for it.
Me: You figured right, thanks man! NYC rocks.
Him: (laughs)

Location: home, cleaning and avoiding the rain
Mood: year-end busy
Music: I want to get off and go home again (Spotify)
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Four events in one night

Tiny Tim was behind it all

Found myself going to three different places in one night the other night – four if you count one where I dropped the kid off.

It all started at Chelsea Piers; in NYC, if you’re pretty well-heeled, you can throw your kid a party there.

Now, there was a time when I mighta been onea those parents but life, being what it is, I’m definitely not anymore.

Having said that, the kid’s friends with a lotta people that are, so we went to our latest party there the other day.

Now, we’ve been to the gymnasium part, the ice-skating part, and the bowling part…

…but this was the first time that we got invited to the Lazer Tag part.

Well, the kid went to the Lazer Tag part, I just stayed at the bar.

Now, I brought my iPad because I figured I’d just duck out and catch up with some reading – which, let’s face it, is my idea of a good time.

But the other parents were cool and interesting, plus there was an open bar so I ended up just staying the whole time, eating…

…and chatting…

Him: Wait, you went to Stuyvesant and Cornell?
Me: I’m as surprised as you are.

…as well as drinking. Did I mention the open bar? I had two Moscow Mules and a beer.

The kid had a coke and a grand time. We both really enjoyed ourselves as well BUT we had to duck out because the kid had another party to go to – and so did I.

So, I brought him to a school event where he had MORE pizza and watched The Grinch while I dashed off to meet the Firecracker at an office party of hers that was, wildly, less than a block from my pad.

Me: Are you sure you didn’t have anything to do with the location of this party?
Her: Nope! Someone else picked the place and here we are.

This too was an open bar, and I was already three drinks in but opted for a fourth, this time a cider.

I ended up meeting one of her new co-workers who just picked up her marriage license and swung by with her fella.

Me: So, where are you from?
Him: China.
Me: My parents were from Taiwan so I’m guessing we’ll have to step outside and fight. I’ll need another drink first, though.

They were on their way to see a Chrismas Carol and he never saw it so the Firecracker and I teased him for a bit.

Me: OK, pro tip, there are a lotta explosions at the end.
Her: Oh, yes. Just plug your ears when the ghosts start appearing.
Me: It’s crazy when you find out that Tiny Tim was the mastermind behind the whole thing.

He was a really good sport and everyone was super nice.

They all left but the Firecracker and I had to get the kids.

Me: Well, we still have 30 minutes. Wanna grab another drink?
Her: With you? Sure!

So, we made our way to the Emerald Inn, which I told you about once before..

We ended up have some more drinks there before we had to leave to get our kids.

Somewhere along the line, I left my bag and iPad somewhere and that was a pain-in-the-neck adventure I’ll tell you all about next time.

Location: the Dakota Bar, having a drink at the Firecracker’s office party
Mood: tipsy
Music: Feeling Christmas all around and I’m trying to play it cool (Spotify)
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Popping over

A doctor’s visit and a magic show

Took the kid outta school the other day because we had to have his annual physical.

Me: I’m curious if you have an idea how tall he might be.
Her: Hmm, lemme see. (types into her computer) Well, it looks like he’ll be something between 5′ 6″ and 6′.
Me: (laughing) That’s a pretty broad range. His mom was 5′ 2″ or so and I’m 5′ 8″ so I’d be thrilled with 5′ 10″.
Her: (laughing also) It’s not an exact science. Hopefully, he will be.

The kid was pretty nervous about his flu shot but she said he could just do a nasal spray.

Him: Will it hurt?
Her: Nope! It’ll feel like a little water in your nose.
Him: OK!

The kid was thrilled that he didn’t have to have a shot. Well, he was kinda thrilled, at least.

Him: Wait, do I still get my double dessert?
Me: What? No, you didn’t get a shot.
Him: That’s not fair!
Me: Well, we could go and get a COVID booster shot and then you can get your double dessert.
Him: (sighing) Nevermind.
Me: Good choice, kid. Good choice.

So, we’re good for another year, I suppose.

Later on in the week, we got invited to go to the holiday party from the ginormous building next door to ours the other day that we normally do Halloween at, so off we went.

The Firecracker’s kid had never been there for Xmas and was excited to be there – my kid’s always excited to do fun things.

We got there just in time to see the magic act, which was pretty cool, I gotta say. For example, the man took a long, slender ballon about three feet long and swallowed it whole.

Her: Where did it go?!
Me: I honestly don’t think you wanna know.
Her: On no…
Me: (laughing) He’ll probably see it again in like 24 hours. Ideally, we won’t.

Afterward, we had dinner there and chatted with our neighbor friends.

Her: You know, he and his wife always say hi to me when they see me in the neighborhood.
Me: I have a lotta nice neighbors.
Her: So nice!

The kids had a grand time running around like maniacs and then playing with some friends they knew there from Halloween.

We had to leave early because it was still a school night I made sure to thank our hosts.

Me: Thanks for always inviting us!
Me: You’re our neighbors, of course.

Like I always say, thank goodness for the good souls.

Location: in front of 3 East 17th Street, remembering Paul, WM, Heartgirl, and my possible past
Mood: ruminative
Music: If it wasn’t for the good souls, life would not matter (Spotify)
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Of all the weird things

You’re my favourite

The Firecracker got me a Christmas ornament without realizing how much I value them.

And that’s kinda is why we get along so well – we see the world the same way.

Her: What do you think?
Me: I love it.
Her: Really? It’s true, you know. You are my favourite weird thing I’ve found online.
Me: (laughing) Same.

Location: at a bar with a deadly past – with her and the kids
Mood: so full
Music: I was making jokes and you politely laughed. I appreciated that (Spotify)
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