Be hot or be cold

In for a penny, in for a pound

Me: Papa’s gotta get back to work and make some scratch.
Him: Scratch!

In the film Heat, there’s a scene where they accidentally kill a guard while doing a heist.

When that happens, they kill everyone. Because the law says that if someone dies during a robbery, that’s murder, period. And murdering one and murdering 20 is the same, so you might as well not leave any witnesses.

A dark example, I know.

On a slightly brighter note, I also wrote about this story once before, over a decade ago:

Alexander the Great used to burn his boats once his army landed somewhere so that they had no choice but either fight and win or die in a foreign land.

Once again, I find myself on foreign shores, far from what everything I know. Far from my old life.

But I’ve made a decision to stay in this world that I despise. So in for a penny in for a pound.

That’s the thing with doing stuff. If you’re gonna do it, you gotta shut up and do it.

I’ve lost my faith in God. If there is a god, he hates my family. If there isn’t, then I’m no worse nor better off than before.

But there are things from the bible that still resonate with me. Revelation 3:16 said that “Because you are lukewarm, neither hot nor cold, I spit you out of my mouth.”

Because I’m staying, I stay as a single father now. Gotta be the best single father I possibly can.

And there’s not much to do but do it. Everything else is a distraction from the real job at hand.

What a job that is…

Me: We’re gonna start potty training, doesn’t that sound like fun!?
Him: (laughing, shaking head) Noooooo.
Me: (laughing also) Trust me, I like it even less than you do. But we do what we gotta do, yeah?
Him: Yes.

Location: Earth
Mood: alive
Music: You bet – If you’re gonna do it, do it right
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