Tag: observations

Categories
personal

More than usual

I have problems

The rain from Hurricane Melissa was pretty bad here in the city but I was stuck in a doctor’s office being told that the only option for my back was another shot before surgery.

As soon as I was done, rushed back – “rushed” being a loose term because the city was really moving at a snail’s pace – but oddly, the pad was bone dry.

It was really weird.

With the amount of water that came down here, the entire unit shoulda seen some serious water damage and yet…not.

Welp, not gonna look a gift horse in the mouth and take my wins where I find them.

Me: I’m still hungry.
Her: You just ate like 40 pieces of sushi. How is that possible?
Me: (shrugging) I have a big brain.
Her: (laughing) The brain doesn’t use that much energy.
Me: The average brain weighs 2% of the body’s mass but uses 20% of the body’s calories. (thinking) I gotta think I’m at least 21%.

Been on a diet again, but not for Scenic Fights, actually. Got a new little project I’ll tell you about once it’s closer to done.

But it’s been a struggle just because I can’t seem to get full for some reason worse than usual for some reason.

A buddy of mine suggested that I’m hungrier than my usual ridic level of hunger because I’ve been working out a bit more with my physical therapy.

But it seems such a tiny additional burden to me that it can’t possibly justify the amount of food I’m taking in.

In any case, my goals are super modest – like five pounds or so just to look better in a suit for something.

I’ll let you know how it goes.

Me: OMG, look at those sammies!
Her: Logan…we just ate.
Me: I know, I know, I know…I have problems…

Location: all over NJ, Manhattan, and Queens today
Mood: pooped
Music: we all have a hunger (Spotify)
Subscribe!
Like this post? Tell someone about it by clicking a button below.

Categories
personal

Construction time again

We really don’t have them all that long

Me: I just realized something.
Her: What?
Me: The kid’s gonna be moving out in just seven more years. That seems so insanely quick.
Her: (nodding) Yeah. We really don’t have them all that long.
Me: OMG, I’m so bummed out suddenly…

Came across this article recently from the oldest practicing – 101 – doctor in America.

He said that he thinks the single most important thing that people can do to stay healthy throughout their lives is to keep moving, something I just said myself recently.

So, obviously, I agree with that.

But, between my friend who just got discharged from the hospital, to me with my crap back, I feel that, at some point, it’s just fighting against the tides.

Everything is about maintenance, I’m not really growing anymore. I’m just trying to deteriorate at a slower rate than most people my age.

Which I think I’m accomplishing.

I’m just shocked that more people aren’t doing everything they can to stave off the inevitable.

Me: It just seems crazy to me – do people not think it’s gonna happen to them?
Her: Getting older? I think they don’t really consider that working out or eating healthfully will really make all that much of a difference.
Me: That’s crazy.
Her: (shrugging) I honestly don’t think a lotta people realize it’s an option.

On that note, I look at the kid and realize that, unlike me, he’s improving every day.

He’s getting stronger and smarter and better each day, and I’m thrilled for him and for it. That’s how it should be.

I just wish he doesn’t have to deteriorate like all humans do.

Then again, that’s what it means to be human, I suppose.

Location: my kid’s bunkbed, looking for missing screws from all the construction around here that have vibrated them off
Mood: prickly
Music: Everything counts in large amounts (Spotify)
Subscribe!
Like this post? Tell someone about it by clicking a button below.

Categories
personal

Well, that didn’t work

A warming plate

Him: It’s like having a C-Section. Essentially, they cut you open from the front, remove all your insides and put it on a warming plate…
Me: A warming plate?!
Him: (nodding) A warming plate. Then they get to work on your spine. For me, it’s been lifechanging. I don’t even think about my back anymore.

Missed posting on Monday because it’s just been a bummer around here.

So, after a solid year of physical therapy, countless doctor’s visits, tons of medication, and – finally – that spinal epidural last week, I can say that there’s been zero improvement with my back whatsoever.

The thing about the shot is that it was/is the second-to-last option, with the last option being back surgery.

But even that gets complicated; a recent article that just came out late last month noted that about half of back surgeries didn’t do a thing.

And the surgery is no joke.

This past weekend, we went to hang out with the Surgeon and Steel and met a famous weatherman who had the back surgery.

He was one of the few people I know that had a successful one – pretty much everyone else has been struggling with back pain even after surgery.

It was disheartening, to say the least.

This was on top of the shot not doing a damn thing for me.

I’ve got a follow up with the shot doctor in about two weeks where he’ll give me some options but, so far, it’s not been encouraging.

On a positive note, however, my buddy is outta surgery, outta the ICU, and currently in a step-down unit before being discharged home.

Here’s to whatever small wins we can get, when we can get them.

Her: He had jello and a cup of tea before I left tonight.
Me: It’ll be a porterhouse and a glass of red in no time. Thanks for the update!

Location: a middle school, trying to figure out what to do
Mood: achy
Music: remind myself that I’m better than this (Spotify)
Subscribe!
Like this post? Tell someone about it by clicking a button below.

Categories
personal

You really gotta stop posting pics of your kids

Telling our stories our way

One thing that we’ve been talking about over at Scenic Fights is the rise of AI and how you can take anyone’s likeness and make videos outta them, like this CBS reporter did:

It’s pretty impressive – and horrifying at the same time.

You can literally make anyone that you have pictures of, do anything.

Seriously, anything (I’ll let you fill in the blanks here).

On this note, you may have noticed that I don’t put up any pictures of my kid with his face showing.

I used to write his name in this blog, but I don’t even do that anymore – that’s the main reason I call him “the kid,” here.

As for why I did that, I’ve told you about before; which is that it’s not fair for me, as his parent, to take away his right to privacy/anonymity just because I can.

What if he doesn’t want to be known? What if he wants to write and tell his own story his way?

If I have years of posts about him complete with his face and everything, that will be all the more difficult.

But even in the back of my mind, I knew that technology would improve to the point where anyone could take a picture and animate it to make it appear that the picture person was doing something they never would.

In fact, that was the main subject of my lecture in Spain all those years ago.

The thing is, I never imagined that it would happen so quickly.

So, I’m doubly glad that I’ve not put up pictures of his face and will continue to do so – and I ask that you consider doing the same if you have kids.

If this whole #EpsteinFiles horror has taught us anything, it’s that there are some seriously messed up people out there.

Location: a bar, getting snockered
Mood: …snockered
Music: I’m diggin’ in, gettin’ ready for what comes (Spotify)
Subscribe!
Like this post? Tell someone about it by clicking a button below.

Categories
personal

Eskimos (DON’T) have hundreds of words for water

I call BS

My kid’s friend: It wasn’t just any fruit. They ate an apple.
Me: (shaking head) That’s not true, man. The bible doesn’t say what fruit it was.
Him: It is true! It’s in the bible!

When I was around 12, I repeated something about someone that turned out to be completely false.

That woulda been fine except that it ended up hurting a girl that I had a crush on.

Despite my honestly thinking it was true, she never spoke to me again.

Don’t remember the girl’s name at all but I remember the situation and learned a valuable lesson that day:

Don’t repeat something unless really know what you’re talking about.

For example, have you ever heard someone say something like, “Eskimos have XX words for snow?”

That’s complete BS.

See every culture has hundreds of words for water.

Obviously, we have the general word water, just like German does (“wasser”).

But all of the following are also types of water:

    • lake, which is a body of water surrounded by land (“der See” in German)
    • pool, which is a small body of water surrounded by land (“die Lache” for a pool of liquid, which I think is what they would use)
    • river, which is a moving stream of water of a fairly large size (“der Fluess”)
    • stream, which is a smaller a current of water similar to a river (“der Bach”)

Of course, we could go on here, with brook, tributary, flow, etc.

We also geysers, waterfalls, etc.

In the air, we’ve got clouds, precipitation, snow, hail, rain, sleet, etc.

Underground, we have aquifers, groundwater, water tables, etc.

When it’s solid, we have ice, slush, glaciers, icebergs, etc.

These are all off the top of my head. There are so many more.

My point being is something I told you many times before, which is that there are alla these saying that have the air of truth to it, without a hint of actual truth to it.

No real reason for this entry.

Just a general observation.

Speakinga observations, I note that the government’s shut down.

Wonder what that’s all about.

Me: (amused) That’s because the Latin word for apple is “malum,” which is a homonym for their word for “evil.”
Him: Oh…
Me: Look, you can give advice to adults…but you should make sure you’re right first.

Location: shooting Scenic Fights all day at my old gym
Mood: mentally and physically exhausted
Music: Please stick to the rivers and lakes that you’re used to (Spotify)
Subscribe!
Like this post? Tell someone about it by clicking a button below.

Categories
personal

Only when danger is far distant

Are you sure about that?

Took a knee to my eye and an elbow to my cheek the other day.

Fun times.

Her: You’re 52!
Me: I am not unaware.
Her: Are you sure about that, Logan!?

My SIL rang me up the other night because Alison’s mom was having a milestone birthday.

So, the next thing you know, the kid and I headed to her place to celebrate.

I spoke to her mom a while ago and she told me not to come for her birthday as it was too much trouble.

Me: You didn’t tell me it was [an important birthday]!
Her: I didn’t want to make a big deal.
Me: So, you wanna make me look like a jerk and not show up, lady?!
Her: (laughing) Thanks for coming.
Me: Of course!

My SIL brought some Italian cookies that I absolutely loved.

See, when I was a kid, my dad’s office was right next door to an Italian bakery.

Once in a blue moon, he’d bring home these exact cookies, and it was like the greatest day ever.

Man, I miss my dad.

Speaking of Italian things, we ended up just eating food from their local Italian joint.

I thought it was great but, evidently, I’m super easy because everyone else thought the food was only meh.

Me: I grew up super poor. This woulda been a feast for us.
Her: Well, we’re not eating the rest of it, so you can bring that home.
Me: Heck, yeah!

Speaking of when I was young, I read Machiavelli’s The Prince way back in 1996 when 2Pac released his like last album under that name (it was his only album I truly disliked).

I remembered the below quote from The Prince and was reminded of it recently what with everything going on in the news these days.

In general men are ungrateful, fickle, false, cowardly, covetous, dissimulating, hungry for profit and quick to evade danger. As long as you succeed and do them good, they are devoted to you entirely; they will offer you their blood, property, life and children… but only when danger is far distant; when danger approaches they turn against you.

Niccolo Machiavelli, The Prince, Ch. XVII

It’s funny how universal some things about humanity are and how they transcend both time and place.

I’m truly interested – and somewhat apprehensive – about what life will be like here in the US in a decade’s time.

Location: a lobster shop, buying a lobster roll
Mood: vexed
Music: The feds surely hope that they could finally nail me (Spotify)
Subscribe!
Like this post? Tell someone about it by clicking a button below.

Categories
personal

Mr. Lo and the Rats from NIMH

Friends are the receipt we have for a good life

Him: Can I watch something?
Me: Can you read instead?
Him: Do I have to?

If there’s anything that’s a source of friction between the kid and me, it’s reading.

As someone that grew up with a total of five channels – ABC, NBC, CBS, PBS, Channel 55 (which is an in itself entry one of these days) – and zero friends, books were my primary source of entertainment.

So, I don’t understand how my child is so adverse to reading.

Fair use

One book that I think about quite a bit, even now, was a book called Mrs. Frisby and the Rats of NIMH.

It’s a kid’s book but, roughly, the story goes like this:

Mrs. Frisby was a mouse married to a mouse named Jonathan, who was killed. Alone with just her son, Mrs. Frisby discovered that her house was about to be destroyed and needed to be moved, but this was impossible because her son Timothy was sick.

So, she pled with an owl, who refused to help her. Until the owl discovered that she was Jonathan’s widow. Then he helped her. And told her to find the rats of NIHM because they too knew Jonathan would help. They would help because she was his widow, and Timothy was his son.

You see, it turns out that Jonathan was one of only two mice that were left from NIHM. Because of the experiments there, they both had exceptionally heightened intelligence. Because Jonathan used that intelligence to help the rats there escape, the rats always felt in his debt.

Now, when Jonathan met Mrs. Frisby, he hid all this from her. Because he didn’t want her to think any differently of him. He just wanted a normal and quiet life with her.

Man, do I get that.

But that’s neither here nor there.

Anywho, as the story went on, Mrs. Frisby discovered that her husband had this entire crazy life before her and that people loved and respected him.

He gave up everything to just have a quiet life with her but the kindness that he gave to others lived on, long after the relationships faded.

The funny thing is that I always thought that I’d die before Alison. But I often thought of this story while she was pregnant and thought, If anything ever happened to me, I’m going leave her and the kid a crapton of good friends that will make sure the two of them are ok.

Unfortunately, as fate would have it, she died before me.

But I’m still amazed at all the friends I’ve collected throughout these years did exactly what I expected them to do – be there for the kid.

Like, just this morning, I was in Brooklyn picking up three (more) huge bags of clothes that my old college buddy Cappy and his wife saved for the kid.

I think that friends are the receipt you have that you lived a good life.

Alison’s friends have also helped us through these times, good and bad – like the ABFF and my SIL.

So, I’m grateful that we’ve both lived lives where we both collected brilliant and good people along the way, because, man, did we need them.

Me: Dude, just read a book. If it’s a good book, it’ll be just as good, if not better, than anything you see on TV.
Him: (resigned) Fine, papa. I’ll read…
Me: (laughing) It’s not a punishment, kid.

A lotta people don’t realize that NIMH was a real place.

It was.

It was short for the National Institute of Mental Health and the kicker was that it focused on mental health.

For someone struggling with insomnia and depression, the irony is unexpectedly deep.

Location: Earlier today, near Atlantic Avenue in Brooklyn
Mood: grateful
Music: Don’t take what’s not theirs, they don’t compare (Spotify)
Subscribe!
Like this post? Tell someone about it by clicking a button below.

Categories
personal

Always a loser

Doesn’t really matter

One of the reasons that I liked Andor so much was because it had a clear beginning, middle, and end.

That’s such a basic thing that you’d think all published media would have, at the very least, that.

Oh man, you’d be so wrong.

Like, I absolutely loved Heroes when it first came out. Ditto for Lost back in the day.

But, somewhere along the line, they were clearly just writing to keep the money coming in and I – and a lotta other people – just lost interest.

But that’s not just with television series, that can happen in movies as well.

Clearly the Godfather and the Godfather II were excellent. But did we really need the Godfather III?

And Rocky – man, that was a perfect film. And Rocky II was pretty good. Plus, I gotta admit that didn’t hate Rocky III.

But Rocky IV turned me off and I never saw a single other sequel after that – dunno if you know, but there were eight Rocky films, total.

Not Rocky but a cool shot I took a while back.

What made Rocky perfect was that, in a nutshell, Rocky was a loser.

And it was just so real – probably because, at that time, the author and soon-to-be star, Sylvester Stallone, was also a loser at that time.

Like, the dude was so broke, he had to sell his own dog for $25 to eat.

Little wonder it was such a popular film, especially with the awkward and overweight Chinese-American crowd.

Well, one of them, at least.

Somehow, Sly managed to convince a major studio to not only buy his script but also let him be the main star in it.

But, along the way, there was a noticeable mess up that they had to fix.

See, in the final fight, Rocky wore a pair of white trunks with a red waistband and stripes down each leg.

Unfortunately, there’s a scene where Rocky sees a giant poster of himself hanging in the stadium, but he’s wearing red trunks with white stripes.

This was actually a mistake by the art department and they didn’t have the time (or money) to redo the poster. Yet this was an important bit of scenery that was needed.

What to do?

Well, all they did was to have Rocky stare at the poster and mention to the promoter, before the fight, Rocky says that the trunks are the wrong color, and the promoter says, “It doesn’t really matter, does it?”

Because Rocky was a loser and he literally just had to show up and get the stuffing beat outta him.

So, what was a pretty glaring mistake ended up pushing the point that Rocky was insignificant in every aspect.

Except he wasn’t.

Just a random story for a random night.

Him: I can’t do anything right.
Me: Don’t say that.
Him: Why not?
Me: Because when you say things, you give them life, even if they’re not true. You are what you say you are. 

Location: A bar in Brooklyn this late morning
Mood: ick
Music: wrapping up his hand, he’s getting ready for the showdown (Spotify)
Subscribe!
Like this post? Tell someone about it by clicking a button below.

Categories
personal

Train (still) on time

Mentally mapping trains

Her: Before I buy more KFC can you check the freezer to see if we already have KFC?
Me: Check the freezer?! Baby, all we’re doing is adding to our current KFC stash if there’s *already* KFC in the freezer. That’s like saying, “Hey, before I make more money, check the bank to see if we have money in the bank already.” Do you hear how that sounds?
Her: Someone’s hangry right now.
Me: Clearly!

The kids are both back for school to start next week. While they’re growing up quickly, we’re still not ready to let either of them take the trains by themselves yet.

This is despite the Firecracker’s kid being just obsessed with trains.

Trains and the subway show up a lot in this blog – even way in the beginning – because that’s my main means of transportation, which is kinda strange if you think about it.

I suppose most of you travel by car and such but that’s a luxury here in the city.

When the Firecracker and I went to Vienna, we didn’t think twice about taking the trains.

And years ago – before this blog, if you can believe it – I went to visit Prague and Berlin and had to get someplace off the train line.

Asked a local where the nearest station was and he said we should take a cab instead because their subway system was so complex.

I remember laughing and saying, “I’m from NYC, I think I’ll be ok.”

And I was.

Same with Vienna and every other major city I’ve ever been to.

Essentially, if you can make it around the NYC subway system, any other system on the planet is a cinch, language issues notwithstanding.

Interestingly, I read this article which said that “city transportation maps with over 250 connections are too complex for most people to navigate. In fact, a staggering 80% of trips in New York already exceed this cognitive limit.”

Meaning that just being able to take the NYC subway system puts you in the elite of cognition as it relates to mental mapping.

In some ways, that’s part of why I wanna raise the kid in the city versus elsewhere – because he’s constantly being tested and pushed in ways that he doesn’t even realize.

Well, that plus the fact that I can readily get all sortsa fried fowl, even in the midst of a pandemic.

Hangry…

Location: by a pool in Central Islip
Mood:
Music: oh my, the train is gone (Spotify)
Subscribe!
Like this post? Tell someone about it by clicking a button below.

Categories
personal

Grief is the price you pay for wonderful things

It is a concern

Headed back out to middle-of-nowhere Brooklyn again the other day to pick up the kid from his sleepaway camp.

He was grinning ear-to-ear when I got him.

Him: Papa!
Me: Hey, kiddo! Man, you got dark! I hope you put on some sunscreen. How was it?

He told me that he had a great time and made a lotta new friends, which was exactly what I was hoping to hear.

When we packed, I asked if he wanted to bring his guitar and he said yes, so we did just that.

Well, it turns out that it’s a good thing that we did because he ended up playing for everyone twice.

The first time was at a talent show…

…but the second time was on the last full day, where he played for the entire camp.

Me: What song did you sing?
Him: Riptide!

I shot the picture below to my MIL.

Me: I wish we could do something about his quiet and reserved nature…
Her: It is a concern

The only thing that bummed me out was that he told me that when it was his turn to talk about Alison, he said that he was ok because he didn’t remember her enough to miss her.

That absolutely gutted me, but I didn’t say anything, because we have to let true things be true.

Then again, if he remembered her, he wouldn’t be functional.

Because all she ever wanted was to be his mom and he would have been devastated at losing her.

On that note, he did get super sad that night at dinner.

Him: (sadly) I miss all my friends.
Me: (gently) Then that means you had a wonderful time. Grief is the price you pay for wonderful things.
Him: But it’s so hard.
Me: (nodding) We’re always gonna miss wonderful things when they’re gone. That’s why I miss your mom all the time, because she was my wonderful thing.

Location: heading out to dinner at the Flatiron to meet my SIL’s new fella
Mood: curious
Music: I got a lump in my throat ’cause you’re gonna sing (Spotify)
Subscribe!
Like this post? Tell someone about it by clicking a button below.