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My two worlds

A Logan divided against himself

Almost exactly 30 years ago, Seinfeld had an episode called The Pool Guy, which had George increasingly upset when his fiancée, Susan, begins hanging out with Elaine and Jerry.

The reason why is that he sees himself as two distinct people:

    • Independent George – the version of himself he is around his friends
    • Relationship George – the version he is with Susan

And he’s upset that the two might possibly merge into one, exclaiming:

If Relationship George walks through this door, he will kill Independent George! A George divided against itself cannot stand!

If you’re at all interested, the scene’s below:

Now, this past month had two notable things happen.

The first one I hinted at earlier this month but now I can tell you – Scenic Fights signed its first deal with a major studio: Apple TV+.

Essentially, we had to do a long-form breakdown of the season finale of Chief of War, and we got our grubby little hands on it way before it aired but couldn’t tell anyone.

I did double-duty, both as on-screen talent and as the attorney for SF in the negotiations.

We had to drop everything to crank it out before the season finale but we’re all pretty pleased with the results.

Here’s hoping it’s the first of many.

The second thing that happened is that I was interviewed for a NY Times article as a lawyer.

I’m predominately an intellectual property attorney – which is what I lectured on both in Malaga, Spain and Paris, France before everything turned to shit.

But I did my first real estate deal with my dad back in 1986, when I was only 13 years old, I’ve run my building since at least 1997, and have done more closings than I care to admit.

Plus, I have this specialized credential of which there are only 350 of us in the entire state of New York so real estate is definitely the area of the law that I know best after intellectual property career.

And after all the stabby-stabby, slashy-slashy.

In any case, I don’t think that – in all these years – I’ve ever let you see my legal work but here’s a (tiny) bit of it – it’s a brief mention but I still think it’s cool:

Ask Real Estate: Scaffolding Has Encased My Building for Years. What Can I Do?

To end this on a humorous note, remember when I told you I went to Brooklyn last week to see Cappy?

That was because he was giving me his sons’ clothes for my kid and The Firecracker’s kid because he and his wife are just the best.

Her: That’s waaaaay too big for either boy. (looking at them) Wait, I think you could fit these.
Me: Me?! They’re clothing for teenagers.
Her: Humor me. Just try them on.
Me: Fiiiiinne. (later) OMG [the shirt and pants] fit!
Her: (laughing) You have GOT to send them a picture a picture of you wearing their kid’s clothes.
Me: I’m wearing these. I look fetch.
Her: Fetch is not a thing, Logan.
Me: (grumble)

Location: Hoboken, watching the boys swim and then walking past Alison’s old pad
Mood: conflicted
Music: I may not be perfect, but I’m perfectly unique (Spotify)
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Only when danger is far distant

Are you sure about that?

Took a knee to my eye and an elbow to my cheek the other day.

Fun times.

Her: You’re 52!
Me: I am not unaware.
Her: Are you sure about that, Logan!?

My SIL rang me up the other night because Alison’s mom was having a milestone birthday.

So, the next thing you know, the kid and I headed to her place to celebrate.

I spoke to her mom a while ago and she told me not to come for her birthday as it was too much trouble.

Me: You didn’t tell me it was [an important birthday]!
Her: I didn’t want to make a big deal.
Me: So, you wanna make me look like a jerk and not show up, lady?!
Her: (laughing) Thanks for coming.
Me: Of course!

My SIL brought some Italian cookies that I absolutely loved.

See, when I was a kid, my dad’s office was right next door to an Italian bakery.

Once in a blue moon, he’d bring home these exact cookies, and it was like the greatest day ever.

Man, I miss my dad.

Speaking of Italian things, we ended up just eating food from their local Italian joint.

I thought it was great but, evidently, I’m super easy because everyone else thought the food was only meh.

Me: I grew up super poor. This woulda been a feast for us.
Her: Well, we’re not eating the rest of it, so you can bring that home.
Me: Heck, yeah!

Speaking of when I was young, I read Machiavelli’s The Prince way back in 1996 when 2Pac released his like last album under that name (it was his only album I truly disliked).

I remembered the below quote from The Prince and was reminded of it recently what with everything going on in the news these days.

In general men are ungrateful, fickle, false, cowardly, covetous, dissimulating, hungry for profit and quick to evade danger. As long as you succeed and do them good, they are devoted to you entirely; they will offer you their blood, property, life and children… but only when danger is far distant; when danger approaches they turn against you.

Niccolo Machiavelli, The Prince, Ch. XVII

It’s funny how universal some things about humanity are and how they transcend both time and place.

I’m truly interested – and somewhat apprehensive – about what life will be like here in the US in a decade’s time.

Location: a lobster shop, buying a lobster roll
Mood: vexed
Music: The feds surely hope that they could finally nail me (Spotify)
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The Handsome Mens Club

A new year

Me: When are you two free for the next meeting of the Handsome Mens Club (trademark pending)?
NFL Player: Next week or following week?
Thor: Absolutely.

It’s been a busy week of catching up with people now that school’s back in session.

It’s funny, before I was a parent, my year began in September just because that’s when it began as a kid.

But as a parent, it begins in September again because the kid’s year now begins in September.

And so does the year of all my friends with kids.

Case in point: Met up with Thor and the NFL Player for dinner around the way at a new joint called Sugarfish because they were both back in town from their summer travels.

The food was very good BUT the rice was warm – warmer than body temperature – and I’ve just never had warm sushi rice before.

Very odd.

Also checked out Thor’s new whip that he got just for fun.

Him: (proudly) Zero-to-sixty in less than three seconds.
Me: Jesus.

Then, that weekend, the Firecracker, the kids, and I all went down to the Surgeon’s for a little get-together where we finished an entire bottle of rum…

Me: (to Flutist, the Surgeon’s wife) Your husband almost killed me last time.
Surgeon: That’s why we’ve been drinking rum.
Flutist: It was that bad?
Firecracker: (nodding) Oh, yeah…oh, yeah…

…before we went up to their roof because the weather was just perfect.

Then, the very next morning, bright and early, I went over to Cappy’s like I said in the last entry.

There, I went to his roof and saw more spectacular skylines.

I live in the basement of a townhouse, so my views are of garbage cans and a parking lot.

Maybe someday, I’ll live in a place with gorgeous views.

Actually, nah.

Don’t wanna get spoiled.

Location: NJ, having what I thought was good Italian food. Others disagreed.
Mood: fatty-fat-fat
Music: wanna let you know I’m gonna build castles (Spotify)

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Mr. Lo and the Rats from NIMH

Friends are the receipt we have for a good life

Him: Can I watch something?
Me: Can you read instead?
Him: Do I have to?

If there’s anything that’s a source of friction between the kid and me, it’s reading.

As someone that grew up with a total of five channels – ABC, NBC, CBS, PBS, Channel 55 (which is an in itself entry one of these days) – and zero friends, books were my primary source of entertainment.

So, I don’t understand how my child is so adverse to reading.

Fair use

One book that I think about quite a bit, even now, was a book called Mrs. Frisby and the Rats of NIMH.

It’s a kid’s book but, roughly, the story goes like this:

Mrs. Frisby was a mouse married to a mouse named Jonathan, who was killed. Alone with just her son, Mrs. Frisby discovered that her house was about to be destroyed and needed to be moved, but this was impossible because her son Timothy was sick.

So, she pled with an owl, who refused to help her. Until the owl discovered that she was Jonathan’s widow. Then he helped her. And told her to find the rats of NIHM because they too knew Jonathan would help. They would help because she was his widow, and Timothy was his son.

You see, it turns out that Jonathan was one of only two mice that were left from NIHM. Because of the experiments there, they both had exceptionally heightened intelligence. Because Jonathan used that intelligence to help the rats there escape, the rats always felt in his debt.

Now, when Jonathan met Mrs. Frisby, he hid all this from her. Because he didn’t want her to think any differently of him. He just wanted a normal and quiet life with her.

Man, do I get that.

But that’s neither here nor there.

Anywho, as the story went on, Mrs. Frisby discovered that her husband had this entire crazy life before her and that people loved and respected him.

He gave up everything to just have a quiet life with her but the kindness that he gave to others lived on, long after the relationships faded.

The funny thing is that I always thought that I’d die before Alison. But I often thought of this story while she was pregnant and thought, If anything ever happened to me, I’m going leave her and the kid a crapton of good friends that will make sure the two of them are ok.

Unfortunately, as fate would have it, she died before me.

But I’m still amazed at all the friends I’ve collected throughout these years did exactly what I expected them to do – be there for the kid.

Like, just this morning, I was in Brooklyn picking up three (more) huge bags of clothes that my old college buddy Cappy and his wife saved for the kid.

I think that friends are the receipt you have that you lived a good life.

Alison’s friends have also helped us through these times, good and bad – like the ABFF and my SIL.

So, I’m grateful that we’ve both lived lives where we both collected brilliant and good people along the way, because, man, did we need them.

Me: Dude, just read a book. If it’s a good book, it’ll be just as good, if not better, than anything you see on TV.
Him: (resigned) Fine, papa. I’ll read…
Me: (laughing) It’s not a punishment, kid.

A lotta people don’t realize that NIMH was a real place.

It was.

It was short for the National Institute of Mental Health and the kicker was that it focused on mental health.

For someone struggling with insomnia and depression, the irony is unexpectedly deep.

Location: Earlier today, near Atlantic Avenue in Brooklyn
Mood: grateful
Music: Don’t take what’s not theirs, they don’t compare (Spotify)
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Medical issues

I’m in

Her: We have a 9:15 [three weeks from now].
Me: Shoot, do you have anything earlier?
Her: Sorry, we’re completely booked. (pause) Actually, unless you want to come in at night at 7:15PM.
Me: When can I do that?
Her: (clicking on keyboard) It looks like we have an opening tomor…
Me: Sold! I’m in.

Since March of this year, I’ve been trying, unsuccessfully, to get an MRI for my back.

I had no less than four appointments, alla which were cancelled because my insurance company refused to pay for it.

Last week, I went to see my ortho and told him that, while I wasn’t getting worse, I definitely wasn’t getting better.

Welp, that worked out because that night, I got a notice that it was approved and I immediately called the MRI joint to get an appointment.

So, the next night, I took the train down to head over to the dreaded 5 Columbus Circle to, hopefully, get my MRI.

It was a super-fast affair as I was the last person there.

Being there brought back really bad memories about Alison.

She did so many of these.

I’m always gonna marvel at her bravery and stoicism.

Afterwards, took the train home and, within a few hours, got a “ding” on my email and pulled up the below.

Dropped my buddy – the radiologist from Pittsburgh a line – and asked if he could do me a solid and tell me what he saw.

He actually rang me up right then and there and chatted with me and told me what I needed to do.

It pays to have diverse and brilliant friends.

Him: Well, it’s all pretty much what you already know. You have slight scoliosis – not that bad – and I see you have a crack in one of your bones, but if it’s not bothering you, not much to do there.
Me: Anything jump out at you?
Him: Besides the slipped disc and the stuff we already mentioned? Not much else. Your kidneys look good, though.
Me: Ah, good, I’ll start eating more salt. (pause) No, uh, cancer, right?
Him: Cancer? No, no cancer or anything like that I see. It’s just [stuff that comes with aging].

Honestly, that’s what I was terrified of.

Knowing that it’s just a herniated disc – which still sucks but is managable – was a huge relief.

Not much to do but keep doing my PT and hoping for the best.

On a (distantly) related note, on the way to the gym, saw a fella being carted into that ambulance.

Assuming that branch musta hit him.

That’s the thing with medical issues; you can be just minding your business one moment and the next, have every single thing about your life turn upside down.

I don’t envy him as I’ve been there, way too many times.

Here’s hoping you have no idea what I’m talking about.

Location: home, listening to the dulcet sounds of jackhammering in the morning
Mood: jackhammered
Music: what was it that I did? (Spotify)
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Our usual schedule

A good start

Me: What do you think?
Him: Logan, you’ve had some stupid ideas before, but this has got to be the worst one yet.
Me: (laughing) Wait, what about…
Him: (holding up hand) Nope. I’m stupider now having heard your plan than I was just before hearing it.

Been chatting with Rain on the regular again.

He’s living in the country right now and has, essentially, become a farmer.

Hell hath frozen over.

But that’s his story to tell, not mine, so I’ll stop here.

Now that the kid’s back, we’re easing back into our usual schedule.

We were supposed to meet up with my college friends for a picnic at Governors Island but ended up not going because it was gonna rain.

We were gonna just have a quiet day at home, but then the ABFF asked if we wanted to get dinner so we did that instead…

…and then ended up by her pad to play some cards.

The Firecracker introduced everyone to Big Two, which I found amusing.

On the topic of games of chance, we also tried our hand in winning Powerball.

I’m sad to say, we are not billionaires.

It’s probably for the best.

Another friend: Let’s say you did win, what would you do?
Me: First thing is upgrade alla my friends to people way too good for me.
Him: (laughing) All of us?
Me: If I won a billion dollars, you’re all dead to me.

The next day, the kid went to a bday party and then a playground afterward.

I think it’s interesting how I both (a) have a normal now and (b) it’s a new normal, so different than when it was just Alison and me.

It’s not – at all – what I thought my life would be but, I’m grateful I have it.

Me: How was your first day of school?
Him: Good!
Me: Do you like your teacher?
Him: Yes, she’s so nice!
Me: (smiling) Great! It’s a good start to the year, then.

Location: home, cutting a box to make it a shipping cost go from $76 to $24
Mood: committed
Music: No, I don’t want it to stop (Spotify)
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Labor Day 2025

Loganisms

Her: When I was a kid, we played a card game called, Big Booty. But I don’t remember how it’s played.
Me: I assume it involved your butt?
Her: Actually, not at all..
Me: That’s both a disappointment and a misnomer.

Saw my college friends this past weekend out in the wilds of Long Island again.

It was really nice that we bookended this summer by kicking it off with them

…and then closing it out with them.

Like always, it was a ton of fun, and a good way to give both boys one final good weekend before school began.

In fact, the kid stayed in the pool for the vast majority of the time we were there.

The ridic delicious food didn’t hurt.

And I even gave in and had some donuts – along with my requisite peanut butter.

Katsmw: You know, [my husband] is eating peanut butter more and saying Loganisms these days.
Firecracker: Does he constantly talk about eating “protein, fat, and fiber” at every meal?
Me: Oh, you’ll thank me when he’s old and looks amazing.

On that note, I was talking to Rain about the kid growing up so quickly.

Me: It’s weird being on the other side of childhood. I remember that, as a kid, school and the years would just draaagggg. College was four years, but it seemed like forever.
Him: Yeah, that makes sense. When we were in college, it was 1/5 of our lives. Now it’s just four years.

College lifetimes seem to sprint by these days.

Actually, everything sprints by these days.

He’s starting up fifth grade now, which seems so wild to me.

Cause I remember fifth grade fairly well and I felt I was a lot older than my kid is now, which I know is purely in my head.

Then again, I spend way too much time in my head, I think.

Location: home, listening to the dulcet sounds of just one jackhammer right outside my door, so…yay?
Mood: less jackhammered
Music: Suffer in the morning, but that taste is all I wanted (Spotify)
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When you know…

…you know

A dear friend wrote me outta the blue one morning.

Her: Hola! You’re probably sleeping but I wanted to see if you and [The Firecracker] are doing anything on the 29th. This guy I’m dating, who apparently is my boyfriend, is taking me to dinner in the city. He’s inviting you both to join.
Me: What?! Yes! And…what!?

I’ve known her a solid 17 years and have never met anyone she’s ever dated, let alone someone she’s called her boyfriend.

So, I moved a buncha things around and the two of us met up with her and her fella at Aqua, downtown.

He was actually a super nice fella and seemed a touch nervous, which I found pretty sweet.

Me: How did you two meet?
Friend: (rolls her eyes) How do you think, Logan?
Me: Ah, the traditional online meet-cute.
Firecracker: Logan wanted to make the best first impression so he ate a full dinner before dinner.
Me: This is true, I had to pregame with a burger and salad.

Of course, this didn’t stop me from finishing my entire meal.

As well as the Firecracker’s.

And my friend’s.

And…

Him: I actually only wanted half the pizza.
Me: Are you sure?
Friend: Just eat it, Logan, you know you want to.
Me: (shrugging) Hokay.
Firecracker: I honest-to-god don’t know where he puts it all. I always say that he’s got a peg leg.

Turns out that he’s only in town for a (very) long-term work project but hinted that he was open to moving to the area for her.

Friend: (joking) I don’t know why he’s so into me.
Me: Oh, I get it.
Firecracker: Me too – when you know you know.

This isn’t to say that they’re guaranteed to end up together – although the Firecracker and I really liked him and hope they work out – but it’s definitely worlds easier when both parties are really into each other.

Afterward, we went to Thyme Bar where I bought a round of drinks before heading back.

The drinks were delicious and insanely strong.

On the ride back, the Firecracker and I got to talking; we both agreed that we felt a spark the moment we met and saw each other almost every day for weeks.

Me: The thing is that, when I met you, I wanted to see you as much as possible because the worst type of disappointment is the kind that takes months to figure out.
Her: (nodding) Same. I wanted to know as soon as possible as well.

Said it before, the worst part about dating is the constant disappointment and disappointing.

Here’s hoping they make their spark last.

Firecracker: (reading over my shoulder as I write this) Like us!
Me: (laughing) Agreed.

Location: home, listening to the dulcet sounds of TWO jackhammers right outside my door
Mood: Jackhammered
Music: And I want you to want to be here with me (Spotify)
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Grief is the price you pay for wonderful things

It is a concern

Headed back out to middle-of-nowhere Brooklyn again the other day to pick up the kid from his sleepaway camp.

He was grinning ear-to-ear when I got him.

Him: Papa!
Me: Hey, kiddo! Man, you got dark! I hope you put on some sunscreen. How was it?

He told me that he had a great time and made a lotta new friends, which was exactly what I was hoping to hear.

When we packed, I asked if he wanted to bring his guitar and he said yes, so we did just that.

Well, it turns out that it’s a good thing that we did because he ended up playing for everyone twice.

The first time was at a talent show…

…but the second time was on the last full day, where he played for the entire camp.

Me: What song did you sing?
Him: Riptide!

I shot the picture below to my MIL.

Me: I wish we could do something about his quiet and reserved nature…
Her: It is a concern

The only thing that bummed me out was that he told me that when it was his turn to talk about Alison, he said that he was ok because he didn’t remember her enough to miss her.

That absolutely gutted me, but I didn’t say anything, because we have to let true things be true.

Then again, if he remembered her, he wouldn’t be functional.

Because all she ever wanted was to be his mom and he would have been devastated at losing her.

On that note, he did get super sad that night at dinner.

Him: (sadly) I miss all my friends.
Me: (gently) Then that means you had a wonderful time. Grief is the price you pay for wonderful things.
Him: But it’s so hard.
Me: (nodding) We’re always gonna miss wonderful things when they’re gone. That’s why I miss your mom all the time, because she was my wonderful thing.

Location: heading out to dinner at the Flatiron to meet my SIL’s new fella
Mood: curious
Music: I got a lump in my throat ’cause you’re gonna sing (Spotify)
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Two college lifetimes

For my boy, of course!

Mom: Was that today? I forgot.
Me: (gently) That’s ok. I forgot too until [my sister] reminded me. It’s good that we forgot today. It’s not like we’d forget him.
Her: Oh, I’d never forget him.
Me: I know, mom.

My dad died eight years ago this week.

I graduated college waaaaaaaay back in 1993. For a solid decade or two afterward, I told time in terms of “college lifetimes.”

Like, eight years woulda been two college lifetimes.

I remember when 1997 rolled around; I marveled that I’d spent four years in college and now, another four years had passed.

College seemed like it would go on forever.

And now, it’s been over for 32 years, which is such a kick in the head.

It doesn’t feel like my dad and Alison have been gone for two college lifetimes, and yet they have.

I suppose the only small solace in all this is both my mom and I forgot that my dad died this week, and that’s such a good thing.

Don’t wanna celebrate, or even memorialize his death, just his life, and how much it meant to me.


My dad drove an old beat-up blue Toyota.

The man coulda bought any car he wanted but that car never gave him a lick of trouble, and he loved it, so he drove it until it practically fell apart.

My siblings and I are pretty much the same way as him.

I used to take the train to Flushing and my dad would pick me up at 老地方, or “the regular spot,” for years in his blue whip.

There was one time, he picked me up with a mischievous grin on his face.

Him: You smell anything?
Me: (getting into the car) Yeah. What is that?
Him: Open the glove compartment.
Me: (opening it) OMG, you got a Fontana’s gyro for me!
Him: (nodding) With extra meat, just like you always ask for.

Swear to god, I had no idea that I’d replay that moment a thousand times in my head.

That was my dad. No one picks me up from the regular spot anymore.

I don’t have him or my regular spot anymore.

He woulda loved the kid so much too.

And he’d be so amused at how much he eats, like me.

Me: Oh man, thanks, dad. You’re the best!
Him: (waving his hand) For my boy? Of course! Just remember to treat your kids the same way.
Me: (laughing) Kids? Me? 

Location: Hoboken, for three minutes, before heading back
Mood: nostalgic
Music: I’ve lost count, all the detours that we take (Spotify)
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