Close to a decade ago, I wrote this entry about how goldfish are only small because of the bowls we put them in. Without being in a small bowl, they can grow up to enormous sizes.
Case in point, just the other day, a nine-pound goldfish was found in a lake. They figured that someone didn’t wanna keep it anymore but also couldn’t just flush it down the toilet so they tossed it into Oak Grove Lake in Greenville, South Carolina. Without any constraints, it just grew to a massive size.
I was talking to a buddy of mine the other night and he told me that cut out a raft of friends. Mainly because they didn’t like the fact that he was changing.
As he was telling me this, I remembered Johnny and alla the other friends that I cut loose throughout the years. That same time that I cut him loose, I cut a mutual friend of ours loose too.
He had accused me of trying to ruin his business but I told him that I was a seasoned lawyer; if I wanted him shut down, he’d be shut down.
Me: I found it insulting that he thought I would try to shut him down and fail versus actually have him shut down.
Him: (laughing) That’s funny. What happened next?
Me: I told him the truth – that his punishment was that he didn’t get to hang out with me. That’s punishment enough.
They were all holding me back in one way or another and I couldn’t have that. I couldn’t allow that.
Life limits you enough; you don’t need those around you holding you down too.
My friend’s bummed that he had to cut them out but I think we both knew he had to.
After all, we’re the average of the five people that we spend the most time with and these people – all good guys – just didn’t see the world the way he did. It’s as simple and complex as that, because your friends mirror you.
Your friends have to grow with you or you’re left with only two unpleasant options:
- Not grow.
- Outgrow them.
He picked the latter.
The ending of any relationship is sad, the more meaningful the relationships are, the sadder the ending is. I should know.
Me: You ok?
Him: I think so. I feel free, I don’t want to go back to the way I was.
Me: And you shouldn’t want to. Trying to be better than you were yesterday isn’t something you should ever be ashamed of.
Location: today, being threatened with a linguini
Music: tell myself to be better and I just can’t help but hope (Spotify)
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