Her: (exasperated) LOGAN! When I tell you to go out to go out and check on my friend, I don’t mean make a pass at her!
Me: In my defense: (a) you weren’t totally clear on that point, (b) you know what I am.
Busy weekend. New roomie moved in. Work drama My brother came to see me too; we hung out with PB, WM and Kathy for a fashion designer’s party. Met a blondie that went to the same grade school as me and lives around the way. I asked her to tell me a secret and she told me a sad one.
Sunday, spoke to HEI and told her that, while I didn’t lose anyone very close to me in 9/11, can’t leave it behind me. And I wanna. Also spoke to Heartgirl, who said she saw a lotta street beef over the weekend. In the backa my head, thought, I can understand, a little, why there’s so much rage.
Speaking of Heartgirl, a conversation with her not that long ago sparked another one with someone else from my past.
Me: I was thinking maybe…maybe you were right.
Her: Oh, Logan, I’m not. I’m sorry.I didn’t mean it. All the cruel things I said.
Me: Ah…Caligirl, doesn’t matter. (pause) How’s married life?
Her: It’s nice. (faint laughter) You should try it some time…
Me: (pause) I’m trying. I’m trying so hard…
Her: (sadly) I didn’t mean…
Me: You did. (pause) It’s ok. I earned it. It’s only right. It’s only fair.You get what you give in this life. But I hope you’re wrong. Maybe you’re right but I hope…
Her: (interrupting) I hope I’m wrong too. We all deserve to be happy. If only for a while.
Location: my parent’s guest room
Mood: hard to say
Music: for a minute it lets me let it all go.
3 replies on “If only for a while”
Hey Lo, looks like things hasn't changed much. But hey, even though we get our downsides, can't really complain, right? Listen, a friend of mine's going to NY next month. I've recommended places to visit, but I can't think of any good place to eat. For some reason, the only things I can remember eating at NY are pizza, cheese cake and Peking duck at China Town. Any recommendations?
By the way, nice pic…
[…] lost her fiancee. After I spoke to Caligirl (and if you read her link above, you should also read this one) I decided to give this other woman a […]