Been dealing with this accountant who seems to know nothing about accounting. Reminds me of a conversation had with AAA a few years ago.
Me: I need someone to come tow my car.
Her: We can’t do that right now.
Me: Miss, that’s like my going into Burger King, asking for a burger and you saying, Oh we don’t have burgers. It’s your purpose.
Her: S’cuse me, what?
Me: Sweetie, it’s your purpose. It’s like a condom. It only has one purpose; should it fail in that purpose, it’s raison d’etre’s moot.
Her: (annoyed) I don’t get it and I’m not your sweetie!
Me: Well, not with that attitude, you’re not…
Her: We can’t do that right now.
Me: Miss, that’s like my going into Burger King, asking for a burger and you saying, Oh we don’t have burgers. It’s your purpose.
Her: S’cuse me, what?
Me: Sweetie, it’s your purpose. It’s like a condom. It only has one purpose; should it fail in that purpose, it’s raison d’etre’s moot.
Her: (annoyed) I don’t get it and I’m not your sweetie!
Me: Well, not with that attitude, you’re not…
I’d call this accountant a *complete* idiot, but that’d give him too much credit.
———-
Met up with my friend Steele for lunch. He’s getting married. Asked him if he was ok with being with one person for the resta his life.
Him: Well, in addition to finding her attractive, I get along with her and her family.
Me: Is that enough?
Him: (thinking) Think of the hottest girl in the world.
Me: OK, done.
Him: Somewhere out there, there some guy thinking, I’m totally tired of ____ing her.
Me: (laughing)
Him: Getting along well…that’s a lot right there.
Me: Is that enough?
Him: (thinking) Think of the hottest girl in the world.
Me: OK, done.
Him: Somewhere out there, there some guy thinking, I’m totally tired of ____ing her.
Me: (laughing)
Him: Getting along well…that’s a lot right there.
Location: 14:00 yest, having sushi on Amsterdam
Mood: damp
Music: Hold Tight. Oh, she said, any way you want it.
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