Buddy once told me this story once, maybe it was on SNL, where this really lonely dude had this affliction where he could only talk in a really sarcastic voice. Yet everything he said was in earnest.
Him: Oh puh-lease, I totally wanna play with someone like you. Like I’m so lonely…
Her: Jerk…
And yet he did. My buddy, who’s not a sentimental fella, said it was poignant.
Consider this, it’s said that: Communication isn’t what the speaker says, it’s what the listener hears.
And my weekend sucked cause…don’t it feel like sometimes that everyone’s speaking English and you’re speaking Martian?
Him: (laughing) Shaddup and drink your girlie pink wine.
Me: Oh, I’m drinking it…y’watch…I’m drinking it…
OK fine, it didn’t totally suck; saw a lotta old friends the past two days. Lemme give you the Zone Improvement Plan version:
- Drive up to 10804 to have some rosé and, possibly, an entire pig.
- Wanted to stay but had to drive to 07030 deal with some baggage.
- Then drive to 10024 to discuss my sinful life I enjoy a bit too much. Fella stops by and I tell him to take his chances while he can.
- Crash and then wake to walk to 10023 and mail something to 91326 fore saying goodbye to the HEI.
- She’s leaving 10001 to maybe make a go with fella around 94117. Tell her to take her chances too. She’s leaving my Venn diagram after all, but she says that she’ll send me an email from time to time.
- Can’t chat for long though; have to dash to 10018 to meet up with a friend for an Irish Breakfast.
- Pat him on the back fore running down to 10010 to get a kiss and a cuppa joe.
- Want to stay longer but take the bus to 10019 to get x-rayed. Lady asks me to give her the finger and then laughs when she realizes what she asked. But I do anyway.
- Happened to be by my old law school at 10023 so walk there and sweet-talk a girlie into letting me into the school for the first time in 10 years.
- Was a nice day so stroll up to 10024 where I meet up with WM for 20 wings and a pitcher of beer.
Saw no less than 20 people in two days but…don’t it feel like sometimes that everyone’s speaking English and you’re speaking Martian?
Or that y’keep saying the same things over again but no one ever hears?
Buddy once told me this story once, maybe it was on SNL…
Location: giving her the finger on 59th Street
Mood: full
Music: maybe I’m the broken one
11 replies on “…you’re speaking Martian?”
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