Trying to be better
Him: Ran into your ex the other day…she didn’t really want to talk about what happened with you two.
Me: Don’t blame her – wasn’t our best moment, if you will.
Him: You don’t hate her?
Me: (thinking) Put it this way – if you were a 31 year-old chick in a happy, stable, relationship, would you throw it all away on some meaningless flings? In other words, how much of a ______ would I have to be for her to do that? Wasn’t our best moment. Wasn’t my best moment. But I’m trying to be better.
Her: He and I were married 10 years. Now we’re not. I had all these plans…
Me: Yeah, you had all these beautiful plans. Now you gotta come up with new ones. And you will. Right now, y’think of them every minute yeah? But in a while, it’ll be every other minute. Then it’ll be every other hour. One day you’ll realize, y’didn’t think of them, or him, all day. Then someday months’ll go by when you don’t think of them.
Her: I can’t imagine that…
Me: That’s what I thought.
Since I’m probably older than you, two random thinks I’ve learned:
- You don’t know if that terrible thing you’re going through is putting onto a better path. It’s the rough times I told you about. So wait.
- When you get to be 36, you wanna strangle your 25, 20 and 15 year-old selves all of time for being such an idiot/jerk/drinker/whore/sap/etc.
Had a condo board meeting today. Tried several times to resign as president. Nope. It’s like being in the mafia. Damn that Asian work ethic…
Location: 20:00, yest, leather couch on 73rd
Mood: still hot
Music: I was following though with my beautiful plans