Letter vs Spirit
When I was a kid, I loved the Support your local… films with Support your Local Sheriff as my favourite of the two.
There’s a scene where an old crook named Pa Danby is trying to bust his middle-aged son Joe Danby outta jail.
Couldn’t find that scene but the above scene is before the bars are put in.
After the bars are installed, the dad tries to yank them out with Joe’s brothers and three horses, but the men are all flung from their horses and the bars don’t budge.
Joe: I could’ve told you it wouldn’t work.
Pa: Why not?
Joe: Because they set these bars in too solid.
Pa: What do you know about anything?
Joe: I helped to set ’em in.
Pa: You helped ’em put in those bars?!
Joe: I didn’t have nothin’ else to do.
Hold that thought.
Did you know that Jefferson Davis was the Secretary of War for the US right before he became the President of the Confederate States?
He built up and – vastly – improved the very army that he would face himself.
[Davis] suggested that the size of the regular army was too small and that its salaries were too meagre. Congress agreed and authorized four new regiments and increased its pay scale. He ended the manufacture of smoothbore muskets and shifted production to rifles, working to develop the tactics that accompany them. Id.
Been thinking about that fact and Support your Local Sheriff a lot lately because the kid and I’ve been arguing a lot lately.
He pushes back with me on a ton of things.
Me: You were supposed to call me.
Him: But you said call when I get out of school, you didn’t say right when I got out.
Me: True, but the point of your calling me was so I would know when to pick you up.
And I realize that it’s a delicate balance with having him be independent but also compliant – two wholly incompatible but necessary things to successfully function in society.
Balancing it properly leads me to no end of stress and us to no end of disagreements.
But this is my job, so I do it.
After all, my dad did it for me – and I’m sure he regretted teaching me to challenge everything.
Unlike Jefferson Davis, however, I’m fully aware that however I train him to behave, I’m gonna have to deal with myself, one way or another.
Because it’s the destiny of all fathers and sons to be adversarial on some things down the line, no matter how much we support and care for one another.
That’s just how things are.
But I’ll always be on his side, whether he realizes it or not.
Here’s hoping that I’m doing it right.
Him: You didn’t say that! You just said to call you after school.
Me: (sighing) Fine. But the next thing we gotta chat about is the letter of the law vs the spirit of the law…
Not looking forward to the teenage years.
Location: My incredibly dusty room sans bathroom
Mood: beat tired
Music: you start me up before breakfast – how about we fight fire with fire? (Spotify)
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