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Quiet summer weekends in New York City

View of Bryant Park Grill, NYC

Friday had lotsa meetings lined up, onea which was with an old work associate. Ended up being a three hour meeting. In a nutshell, he got screwed. I’d fight hard for any client but even more so when it’s a friend.

As an odd twist, on an unrelated point, his old boss was the CEO of a Fortune 100 company – and a kid that I went to elementary and junior high school with. We both knew each other because we were in the nerd group. It’s like being in the cool group except the complete opposite of everything and no one calls you except to get homework assignments.

Me: Tell him you know Fatlogan.
Him: They really called you that?
Me: (laughing) That or Whaleboy. Ask him and see. He’ll remember me only because I was the second fattest kid in the whole school and always wore the same four shirts.

I wonder if he talks like a kid from Queens.

Afterward, my boss and I grabbed some food and rum over at The Bryant Park Grill. Then more rum at the Cellar Bar. And then more rum at Salute. He thinks I’m good at what I do. It’s nice to hear. Even nicer when there’s rum involved.

Two glasses of water at Bryant Park Grill, NYC

Saturday, HG and I rented a whip and made it out to Staten Island for some family stuff. Spoke to HG’s cousin for a bit.

Her: I think that when people have kids, they’ll be a lot like they were.
Me: Then that means my kids’ll be pantsed a lot.

It was a nice drive there and back. Afterward, the wife and stopped by to get some frozen yoghurt at a new joint down from us called 16 Handles. Afterward, we lumbered home.

Me: It was a nice weekend.
Her: It was. But it’s good to be home.

Glass of rum on the rocks with a thick slice of orange at Salute! NYC

Location: sweating at a wooden desk
Mood: dreading the heat
Music: the future could it be the good old days
YASYCTAI: Keep cool – it’s a scorcher today. (24 hours/1 pt)
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Feeling like a wealthy adult

View east from Lincoln Center

The weather’s been relatively cool this summer; my running joke’s that in NYC, we go from Winter straight into Summer without a stop in Spring. This year, however, we’ve had spring and there’ve been several nice accompanying days.

Stopped by my old law school to pick up some things and it’s a bit shocking to me that it’s been 15 years since I first walked through those doors. It still smells the same. Smells are the first things I ever remember.

View east from Lincoln Center

Speakinga remembering and smells, saw my mom and dad along with some uncles and aunts this past weekend. HG and I headed out to Flushing where we met up with them in the same restaurant we went to for our Chinese wedding. Somea my relatives were in Asia at the time and they wanted to meet my wife.

Still feels strange writing the word, “wife.”

We took the train out there insteada the subway. It was my first time ever. Afterward, HG went home first so I could get a haircut. My thoughts and I took the 3:06 train to Penn Station.

S’funny, you can live in a place your entire life and never see it from a particular angle. Been to five-star hotels on private beaches in Nantes, suites in luxury ships off the coast of Denmark, private celebrity parties, and expensive fund-raisers. But being on a $12.50 train ride with HG made me feel wealthy and picking up the tab for lunch made me feel like an adult. Silly, isn’t it?

Finally, it’s supposed to be 95 degrees today.

Well, that’s the end of that.

Location: getting ready to get to the bank
Mood: cool, for now
Music: oh, this has gotta be the good life
YASYCTAI: Buy something nice for yourself that makes you feel wealthy. (1 min/1 pt)
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Wedding Celebration 4

 

Entering the Parlour Midtown, NY.

Although HG and I wanted to keep our wedding to a minimum, we threw ourselves a little something out in Manhattan at a place called the Par. So we went from having one small thing with just the two of us and her sister, and another small thing with her parents, and another small thing with my parents to four small things.

Her: I’m so glad this is all going to be over soon. We’re so sick of ourselves!
Me: We really are.

Had set this whole thing up months ago cause it’s in the building that RE Mike owns. But when the head chef didn’t respond to repeated emails, finally called the place.

Me: Is Dave around?
Woman from space: He no longer works here
Me: Oooookay, what about the owner John?
Woman from space: He’s no longer with us either.

Insert mild freakout here.

The thing’s that y’can freak out all you want, so long as y’keep it to yourself.

After a lotta phone calls and a mad dash down there several hours before the event, was reassured that all was good. The prior owner and head chef were both nice guys. The new owner and new head chef were also nice guys. Didn’t let HG know about the snafu until long after the entire event was over.

She, my brother, and a group of friends arrived just before the party started and we all had a grand ole time. Beautiful space, killer food, open bar, all of my people, and my person. Even Metrodad made an appearance. What more could a fella ask outta a night?

Party at the Parlour Midtown, NY

My buddy Ricky and Mattman both made toasts and HG and I each made one as well, which got a laugh or two. Afterward, leaned into Heartgirl and told her that I loved her.

No party is ever over with Rain involved until he leans over to me and says, “Man, I’m so ____up.” With that our wedding celebrations ended.

Drunkenness hides no secrets.

What new adventures this week?

 

Location: not where you’d expect.
Mood: busy
Music: here we go! I’m feeling so real
YASYCTAI: Travel for yourself when you can. (days/3 pts)
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Wedding Celebration 3

Wedding bouquet

Although HG and I wanted to keep our wedding to a minimum, my parents threw us a little something out in Flushing. So we went from having one small thing with just the two of us and her sister, and another small thing with her parents, to three small things.

Dad: Should I make place cards?
Me: I don’t think we need them.
Dad: How do I spell her last name?
Me: OK, you have a pen?
Dad: Yes.
Me: You ready? (pause) Here you go: L…O.

My parents had it on Friday evening out near them so we rented a car. While the weather was beautiful, it took us forever to get there; 90 minutes to travel about 14 miles. That’s the thing about the City – anytime there’s beautiful weather, everyone wants out at once, meaning mad gridlock.

UWS to Flushing, NYC

We actually went to my parents so HG could shower and change. My mother made her a bouquet of roses and gave me a boutonniere. After a flurry of activity, we arrived at the restaurant and got settled in. It was almost all my dad’s friends and relatives since my mom’s family is mostly in another state. One of my best friends, Tommy, came by as well, along with my brother and his girlie, who flew in from Cali.

Most of it was very traditional Chinese wedding fare – we brought the red and white wines, which everyone enjoyed. Suppose that a wedding banquet fulla chili and rum options’d be unseemly.

Crabs on a bed of sticky rice

Wish I took more pictures but I was too busy running around meeting and greeting. A Chinese tradition’s to give out red envelopes with money in it, which I find to be eminently practical. More people should take up that practice.

The thing about weddings’s that it’s a chance to see people you’ve known all your life in a happy setting. Some people I’d not seen in over a decade. Think HG was exhausted with all of the handshakes, hugs, and introductions. When it was over, with bellies full, she and I made our way back to the car.

Her: I’m tired.
Me: (laughing) We went from having nothing to having three things.
Her: And there’s more!

Location: home, prepping for a speech
Mood: busy
Music: Didn’t even know That love was so, so Hey
YASYCTAI: Eat some avocados – they’re apparently very good for you. (5 mins/0.5 pt)
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Wedding Celebration 2

Wedding pictures

Although HG and I wanted to keep our wedding to a minimum, her parents threw us a little something out in Hoboken. So we went from having one small thing with just the two of us and her sister to two small things.

I arrived…moist. The weather was muggy with the occasional shower or two; it’s been raining all week.

Chicken on a bed of vegetables pictures

Met mosta her family before but it was nice to have a moment to sit down and actually speak with them. It’s not all of time, but usually people reflect their families and HG’s family was essentially an extension of her.

Felt very welcomed into the family.

Her dad had mentioned to her mom that wedding favors’re never for men, so as a funny aside, she got us wrenches.

Wedding wrench

When her grandma on her mom’s side was telling me a story and said, “…your grandfather…” something.

Made me laugh cause I don’t think she noticed that she said your grandfather rather than HG’s grandfather. Made me thinka my grandma too.

Sat down and spoke with her other grandma too; when I turned cause someone was taking a pic of us, she snuck in a kiss on my cheek and I laughed.

Drinks at the W Hotel

At the night’s end, went with her siblings to a hotel bar where we downed some drinks. Her brother pulled me aside and shook my hand. Welcome to the family, he said.

Me: Ah, you guys are all so nice, if I were a douchebag, you wouldn’t tell me.
Him: Oh, you’d know, you’d know.

Molten Lava Cake

Location: about to run out to pick something up
Mood: hopeful
Music: we could be married and then we’d be happy
YASYCTAI: Call a relative; time just goes by so fast. (5 mins/1 pt)
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Signal versus noise: My plans, my pad, my people, my poison, and my person

From my sis regarding my mom. Except for the Vietnamese and the fact nonea us were ever the valedictorian, it’s pretty accurate.

Find it oddly touching for reasons I can’t fully explain. Says Happy Mother’s Day better than anything I could write so let’s just leave it at that.

Brunch foor

Stayed over at my parents and then had brunch over at my old college buddy’s place downtown over the weekend. A report came out that said that the key to happiness is human relations – you can watch it here.

Sounds right to me, iron sharpens iron and all of that.

The bacon doesn’t hurt, either.

A business blog I read’s named Signal Vs. Noise. The name comes from an engineering phrase that differentiates between the amount of useful information being transmitted versus that which’s just useless noise.

People around me’re always telling me stuff. I could be a great ______ if only I ______.

The assumption is, of course, that I dunno what I’m doing, which’s a bit insulting in and of itself. Actually do have a plan and, despite unexpected calamities, have managed to stick to that plan.

Y’know the difference between strategy and tactics? A strategy’s the big goal (Capture or kill Osama bin Laden); tactics are how you attain that goal (conventional warfare or propaganda). People confuse the two all of time, which’s fine, except when they try to push their inability to differentiate upon me.

My tactics shift constantly, as they should, but my strategy never changes.

There’s this section in Made to Stick where the author talks about the Tapper Game. It’s comprised of two players; one’s a tapper that taps out a song on a table, and the other’s a listener that tries to figure out the song. Participants thought they’d get about 50% right; the actual number was less than 2%.

Why?

Cause the tapper, the one tapping out the song, already knew the song in his head and could “hear” it. The one listening to only the tapping couldn’t.

That there’s, in my opinion, about 90% of what’s wrong with all human relationships. The stuff you hear in your head isn’t what the other guy hears. After a while, y’get tired of explaining stuff and either give up or continue to argue.

Am old enough to try and listen to other points of views and make my own decisions. But I’ve got a plan, a strategy, a song I hear in my own head. And I’ve got the results I wanted from these plans – my pad, my people, my poison, and my person. Which means that the song in my head is the right song for me.

And that’s the other thing, it’s my song.

It’s noise to you but signal to me.

Location: in front of my computer as always
Mood: irritated
Music: (the song in my head)

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Easter 2011

Brooklyn view of Verrazano Bridge


Me: Do you have a charger? I need to charge my phone.
Her: Just turn it off.
Me: What if someone needs to calls me?
Her: Who’s going to call you?
Me: (turning off phone, muttering) Someone might call me…

Work’s slowed down a bit so been busy writing, taking classes, and wrestling. Regarding the writing, got a short story idea in my head. Regarding the classes, it’s just a lotta online classes they make you take to maintain your licenses. It’s a lotta classes. Regarding the wrestling, am still terrible, but just slightly less so. A buddy I’ve not seen in a while came up to roll on Easter Sunday; just found out he split with his girl. Sucks; it’s always the disappointment that gets you.

I try to take advantage of these lulls when they come but it’s a weird aspect of eating what you kill: when you’re busy, y’wish y’had downtime to do something besides work; when y’have downtime, y’worry about the lack of work.

Went out to see HG’s rents for Easter Dinner where I stuffed myself silly. Stopped by to see her grandparents. Realized that her grandma’s the only grandma I got now.

Took twice as long to get back as usual because of the rain and holiday traffic. There never are enough sunny days, yeah?

Location: taking more CLE on the computer
Mood: okay
Music: I live on the corner of Grey Street and the end of the world
YASYCTAI: Fire up those classes. (8 hours/1.0 pt)
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My old crockpot

Old Rival Crock Pot

Thanks for the birthday wishes.

Decided to make some braised brisket in red wine the other night so I whipped out my old crock-pot. It’s been in my family since I can remember – maybe 25-30 years? My mom used to make this killer spaghetti sauce she learned from my Italian neighbor Dot. It’s also where she made chili from a Mexican neighbor and how I made a lotta my chili too.

When I moved outta my family home, my mom asked me what I wanted and I asked for that.

Her: This old thing? Why don’t you buy a new one?
Me: Cause I want that one.

Anywho, put it on the counter top and noticed the back had cracked and a leg had fallen off. Managed to prop it up on a stacka bank checks to make the brisket but it was clear it was it’s last dish.

They’re cheap. Like $40 for a good one. And this one’s got flowers and lotsa stains on it; doesn’t match my clean white kitchen. But it was my bita home in my apartment and I’m sad to see it gone.

You don’t love a picture causesa the paper it’s printed on, y’love a picture because of what it represents.

Man, I loved that broken old thing.

Ha – suppose someone’ll say that about me some day. One would hope, anywho…

Braised beef with herbed carrots and coconus

Location: taking CLE on the computer
Mood: nostalgic
Music: The only way to really know is to really let it go
YASYCTAI: Buy a new slow cooker. (10 mins/0.5 pt)
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Owning up to mistakes

Her: …I liked Capture the Flag.
Me: “Capture the Flag?” Never heard of it.
Her: Really? Well, there’re two teams and you run after the other and when you tap…
Me: That sounds terribly violent.
Her: (shakes head)

Been thinking a lot about having a kid. Like to be a dad but dunno what’s in store for us. Suppose the only thing to do is to keep the head down and clock those dollars while we wait for him or her.

Speakinga clocking dollars, got screamed at by one of my newest ones cause of a rookie mistake I made; been doing what I do for over a decade and I’ve never made this mistake but the client wanted a rush job so I rushed and screwed something up. So the client tore inna me.

While I wouldn’tve made this mistake had I not been rushed, it was still my fault. I should have either turned down the gig or done it right. Since neither happened, it was ultimately on me. It was a stupid, embarrassing mistake so I let him finish yelling at me, apologized, and said, “Lemme make this right.” Spent the resta the day trying to make it right.

The thing with being in the service industry’s that, even if you’ve had a client for a decade and’ve never screwed up, you just need one mistake and you’re gone. Just the way it goes.

Mistakes happen, not much you can do but apologize, learn from them, and move on.

On a brighter note, over the weekend, went out for dinner with the wife. We don’t go out much any more so it was like going on a date; we laughed about our old lives. We’re gonna try and do that more often.

Also, got a letter from Gshok. Opening up the mailbox and pulling out something that’s not a bill or ad’s rare for me. I think I’ll do the same for her today.

It’s a rainy Monday but good weekends usually carry me through to about Tuesday.

Location: chair, listening to the rain outside
Mood: tired
Music: In this world, it’s hard to get it right
YASYCTAI: Incorporate the words “big pimping” into a sentence with someone today. (10 secs/1 pt)
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Our wedding day

Me: You ready?
Her: Yes.

The funny thing about picking a wedding date’s that you’re really picking an anniversary. We figured February’s always dreary so why not have a good reason to look forward to it?

———-

Last week, I took three last minute assignments for work. Combined, it was the equivalent of what I’d make in three weeks in three days so I couldn’t say no. Course, that meant that I was up until midnight each night working and then fighting the insomnia.

One client finished without a hitch on Tuesday but the second client needed the work product on Thursday morning so wrote it all up and packaged it for him to pick up in exchange for a check at 10:30AM.
We woke up on Thursday and while Heartgirl got ready, I finished up. The client pulled in front of my building and I hopped in.

Me: (handing him papers) Here you go. It should have everything you need.
Him: (pulling out check) Thanks for the quick turnaround on this Mr. Logan. You’re really getting married this week?
Me: Not this week. In 90 minutes.

Took his check, shook his hand, then popped out to zip back home to get ready – the great thing about being a fella’s that y’can get dressed to the nines in nine.

Her: Men. It’s not fair.

Just before I turned off the computer, shot a contract to the last client and him I’d be offline until the weekend.

Cabbie dropped us off at Worth and Centre where her sister was waiting for us. We went inside to speak to the guy at the desk; some lady was yelling him for some reason. After all the yelling, he turned to us, asked us for some id and our paperwork. After he checked it all, gave us a number, C930, and we took a seat.

45 minutes later we sat in the west room chapel and waited. We looked at the books from the 1940s where people signed their names. Everything’s all digital now. A smiling lady came in and told us to stand in front of the podium.

“Do you take this…”
“I do.”
“I do.”

Maybe 59 seconds later we were legal. We hopped a cab up to the London Hotel, which turns out not to be in London but rather in midtown, NY. Her sis took us out to eat and we ended up having a two hour lunch before she took off for home.

We then went upstairs to our suite where we did what all newlyweds have done for hundreds of years – we watched Robin Hood on Netflix. She passed out before it was over.

Met up with RE Mike that Friday night and checked out the space he rents. He and the restaurant owners brought us a coupla bottles of champagne. Told the owner that I’d return the favour with a bottle of good rum.

Spent the resta the weekends trying out the words “husband” and “wife.” Quite surreal, lemme tell ya.

Both sets of parents were thrilled – always a good sign.

Told her to tell her parents to rest easy cause I’d always take carea her and do mosta the cooking.

She is, after all, family. I’d keep her safe.

Location: in fronta stacks of paper
Mood: good
Music: There’s a hole in my pocket that’s about her size but I think everything’s gonna be alright
YASYCTAI: Spring cleaning soon. (120 mins/1 pt)
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