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business personal

Owning up to mistakes

Her: …I liked Capture the Flag.
Me: “Capture the Flag?” Never heard of it.
Her: Really? Well, there’re two teams and you run after the other and when you tap…
Me: That sounds terribly violent.
Her: (shakes head)

Been thinking a lot about having a kid. Like to be a dad but dunno what’s in store for us. Suppose the only thing to do is to keep the head down and clock those dollars while we wait for him or her.

Speakinga clocking dollars, got screamed at by one of my newest ones cause of a rookie mistake I made; been doing what I do for over a decade and I’ve never made this mistake but the client wanted a rush job so I rushed and screwed something up. So the client tore inna me.

While I wouldn’tve made this mistake had I not been rushed, it was still my fault. I should have either turned down the gig or done it right. Since neither happened, it was ultimately on me. It was a stupid, embarrassing mistake so I let him finish yelling at me, apologized, and said, “Lemme make this right.” Spent the resta the day trying to make it right.

The thing with being in the service industry’s that, even if you’ve had a client for a decade and’ve never screwed up, you just need one mistake and you’re gone. Just the way it goes.

Mistakes happen, not much you can do but apologize, learn from them, and move on.

On a brighter note, over the weekend, went out for dinner with the wife. We don’t go out much any more so it was like going on a date; we laughed about our old lives. We’re gonna try and do that more often.

Also, got a letter from Gshok. Opening up the mailbox and pulling out something that’s not a bill or ad’s rare for me. I think I’ll do the same for her today.

It’s a rainy Monday but good weekends usually carry me through to about Tuesday.

Location: chair, listening to the rain outside
Mood: tired
Music: In this world, it’s hard to get it right
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personal

Our wedding day

Me: You ready?
Her: Yes.

The funny thing about picking a wedding date’s that you’re really picking an anniversary. We figured February’s always dreary so why not have a good reason to look forward to it?

———-

Last week, I took three last minute assignments for work. Combined, it was the equivalent of what I’d make in three weeks in three days so I couldn’t say no. Course, that meant that I was up until midnight each night working and then fighting the insomnia.

One client finished without a hitch on Tuesday but the second client needed the work product on Thursday morning so wrote it all up and packaged it for him to pick up in exchange for a check at 10:30AM.
We woke up on Thursday and while Heartgirl got ready, I finished up. The client pulled in front of my building and I hopped in.

Me: (handing him papers) Here you go. It should have everything you need.
Him: (pulling out check) Thanks for the quick turnaround on this Mr. Logan. You’re really getting married this week?
Me: Not this week. In 90 minutes.

Took his check, shook his hand, then popped out to zip back home to get ready – the great thing about being a fella’s that y’can get dressed to the nines in nine.

Her: Men. It’s not fair.

Just before I turned off the computer, shot a contract to the last client and him I’d be offline until the weekend.

Cabbie dropped us off at Worth and Centre where her sister was waiting for us. We went inside to speak to the guy at the desk; some lady was yelling him for some reason. After all the yelling, he turned to us, asked us for some id and our paperwork. After he checked it all, gave us a number, C930, and we took a seat.

45 minutes later we sat in the west room chapel and waited. We looked at the books from the 1940s where people signed their names. Everything’s all digital now. A smiling lady came in and told us to stand in front of the podium.

“Do you take this…”
“I do.”
“I do.”

Maybe 59 seconds later we were legal. We hopped a cab up to the London Hotel, which turns out not to be in London but rather in midtown, NY. Her sis took us out to eat and we ended up having a two hour lunch before she took off for home.

We then went upstairs to our suite where we did what all newlyweds have done for hundreds of years – we watched Robin Hood on Netflix. She passed out before it was over.

Met up with RE Mike that Friday night and checked out the space he rents. He and the restaurant owners brought us a coupla bottles of champagne. Told the owner that I’d return the favour with a bottle of good rum.

Spent the resta the weekends trying out the words “husband” and “wife.” Quite surreal, lemme tell ya.

Both sets of parents were thrilled – always a good sign.

Told her to tell her parents to rest easy cause I’d always take carea her and do mosta the cooking.

She is, after all, family. I’d keep her safe.

Location: in fronta stacks of paper
Mood: good
Music: There’s a hole in my pocket that’s about her size but I think everything’s gonna be alright
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personal

By the time you read this, I’ll be married

By the time you read this post, Heartgirl and I will be married. Or at least enroute. Edit: 10:47PM – Married

———-

Passed her green eyes three years ago exiting a bar downtown. Asked WM to introduce us.

Her: Alison.
Me: Logan. (shaking her hand) Well look at us – we’re like ships in the night; you’re stepping in, I’m stepping out. We’d have lovely children, you and I, what with my looks and your brains. They’d be a shoe-in for the ivy league.
Her: What? (laughing) Then stay.
Me: Can’t. Got an appointment to keep. But New York’s a small town – ships in the night, yeah?

Location: home
Mood: happy
Music: you are the only exception and I’m on my way
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personal

Friends and weddings

Missed posting last Thursday – no real reason but I’ll tell you why some other time.

In other news, been planning the wedding. Parta the issue why it takes so long is that there’re so many people in my family. My family’s side alone, we’re talking over 100 heads. It’s pretty ridiculous. As for her, she’s got far less so if anything, it’ll be crazy lopsided. We’ve been talking more and more about just up and getting hitched ourselves and doing something for our friends and family later. Suppose we’ll see.

On a related point, the thing about cutting your friends is that the friends you’re left with, you don’t have to make excuses for:

Sorry, he’s a little snarky at times.
Sorry, she’s always like that.
Sorry, he does have his good points.
Sorry, I’ve known him for years, he went through a lot.

It’s exhausting.

Not all of your friends’ve gotta be smooth as silk but I got little tolerance for poor behaviour these days. When Steel and Bryson came by to learn to cook from my dad, they didn’t know each other but we all got along great. It’s a nice side benefit for having a low tolerance of general douchebaggery.

You don’t gotta have a lotta friends. Y’just gotta have ones that’re worth it.

Location: off to physical therapy shortly
Mood: tired
Music: want to be the best I can For me for you for everyman
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personal

Aerelon: No one that was born poor wants to stay poor

Mona Lisa on a NYC Building

1983
Me: Why do I have to know what a salad fork looks like?
Him: (exasperated) Because, one day you’ll sit down with people that have a fork for salads and you’ll need to know which one to use. Now’s what’s that?
Me: Soup spoon.
Him: (beaming) Yes, soup spoon. That’s right. Good.

Thanks for taking the time to write a comment or email. Found it all really interesting the very different views people had. It’s funny but minorities & native-New Yorkers saw one thing (the second exchange) while non-minorities & non-New Yorkers pretty uniformly saw another (the first exchange).

As I wrote, that was the entire conversation; she never even bothered to respond. And rather than deal with any of the points I made, she sniffed, “Ugh, Logan, ugh! Privileged sentiments bore me.”

Like Nietzxche said, “Convictions are more dangerous enemies of truth than lies.” She’s so smugly certain she’s right, she has no need to respond to new information.

Switching gears, you can always tells someone that used to be fat. They lumber. They walk as if they still carry the weight.

When I did lose the weight, onea of first things I did was ask my mom to buy me a nice sweater. She brought me to Alexander’s and I picked out a grey sweater from a bin. Got it big just in case I got fat again.

Wore that sweater proudly cause I got it at a department store. At the time, we didn’t usually get our clothes from a department store. When I told Grace in school about it, she laughed and said that only poor people shopped at Alexander’s and that I probably got it from the bargain bin. So I put the sweater away and only wore it at home.

It took me years to unlearn how to walk like fat person. Just like it took me years so that people didn’t immediately say, “You sound like you’re from Queens.” And years to know that what other people think of me is nonea my business.

Still, gotta admit that “privileged sentiments” made me pause. But not for reasons y’might think.

That I don’t sound like someone born to penniless immigrant parents outside an industrial park in Queens, New York, I take as a particular compliment. No one that was born poor idealizes it, only rich folk that have no clue.

Take it as a testimony to those parents who made sure, even though we grew up with halfa nuthin, we still got a proper upbringing – jia1jiao4. They taught me manners, how to love reading, and how to figure out which one was the salad fork.

“Privileged sentiments” – gotta tell my mom. She’ll take that as a particular compliment too.

And now, geekiness:

Location: hopefully Croxley later
Mood: lethargic
Music: You got the talking down, just not the listening
YASYCTAI: Seriously, stop idealizing things you know nuthin about. NYC in 1993 is hardly NYC when it was gritty. Try five years earlier on for size. (2 mins/1 pt)
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Categories
personal

In my life

Condiments at a diner

Had my second Thanksgiving dinner with my family; Heartgirl came along. After a ridiculous amount of food, we all settled down to play cards and Taboo. It felt like family.

That Saturday, saw my old college buddies for dinner; it was a potluck “Friendsgiving.” Brought some sweet potatoes that I made as well as a pie that I bought. Afterward, had some of his fine bourbon, which I enjoyed, but not as much as my usual rum. Per my usual clumsiness, managed to spill wax all over some furniture. That too felt like family.

The guy I’ve known the longest – since we were about 16 (21 years) – just had a kid. It’s weird seeing your friends as parents.

After that, went and saw Hazel, who happens to be his sister, and my buddy Paul with my brother and his new girl for karaoke. Didn’t do much singing but I did have some more drinks there although the drinks were so watery that it was like drinking nuthin.

Sunday, we all just got up and had diner food with my bro and the girls before he headed home to LA.

My lens wasn’t snapped in correctly for most of the stuff so no good pictures to show you of most of it. Figured that out when I took the above pic at the diner.

S’ok, there’s always next year. Hope you had a similar friend/family-filled holiday.

Man, gotta hit the gym.

Location: Brooklyn within the hour
Mood: fat
Music: places have their moments with lovers and friends, I still can recall
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business personal

My three business credos

Birds on a wire; pigeons on a streetlight, NYC

Think I’m gonna stop writing for Technorati. No major single reason but a few little ones:

  1. Been crazy busy with work and those articles take me longer than anticipated to write – plus they make change requests that eat up more time
  2. Kinda feel like there’s no real support for articles since they run them all equally without any promotion
  3. There’s no means of auto-publishing. This I understand cause they want some editorial control but it has ramifications for me.

My three business credos, which’ve enabled me to not have a “real job” for decades yet still live comfortably, are:

  1. Underpromise, overdeliver.
  2. Save 10% of everything you ever make.
  3. Be a man of your word

It’s the last one that causes my friction with Technorati. Said to readers that we’d publish weekly on Fridays and yet, no; the editors manually put up each entry so articles’re published when an editor gets around to it.  They completely missed publishing last week.

It’s not as if I think people’re waiting with bated breath for my next installment; it’s that I said I do it.

When I say I’ll do something, it gets done. Even the people that can’t stand me know that if I give my word, it’s done.

Figure that my job’s to write and their job’s to publish. Y’can’t keep bugging someone to do what they’re supposta. Ergo, no more column.

It’s a shame – liked writing it and they weren’t bad fellas, just maybe understaffed.

Maybe I’ll move it somewhere else – any ideas?

———-

Him: How do we get to the museum?
Me: Just walk down Broadway and make a left at 79th Street. Keep walking straight until you see a large building that looks like a museum.

HG’s brother stayed over the other night and enjoyed hanging out in the city enough to stay for another dinner. We ended up doing Vietnamese the first night and pizza the next.

It’s nice when your significant other’s siblings and relatives aren’t jerks. Hoping they think that it’s nice that their sibling’s fiancee’s not a jerk too. It’s rough when that’s not the case.

Went to wrestle the other day and now my neck’s all jacked up; can barely move right now.

Man, the holidays’re gonna leave me a porker.

Location: at my desk, immobile
Mood: in pain
Music: I guess action speaks louder than words
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dating personal

It’s the same old thing as yesterday

Couple fighting in Lincoln Center, NYC

Was taking a quick break from work this week and someone told me they saw an ex being interviewed on TV so I watched the vid. She looked good and it sounds like her job’s going well. I’m glad. Hard to believe it was over four years ago.

It’s funny, that guy that loved her so I don’t even know any more.

Douglas Adams once said, I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I intended to be.

We all think we’re the king of pain at one point or another. The sane people realize that we have no idea what we’re talking about.

Watched it for another minute before I flicked it off and went back to work.

———-

HG’s brother’s staying over as the first member of her family in our pad. This is cool cause, first of all, he’s a nice fella. Second of all, it forces me to get things done to free up my evening; dunno the last time I had a free evening.

Finally, we get to go out for sushi. Win/win/(win) for all concerned.

If you’re looking for me, look for the grown man in the corner stuffing his cheeks like a chipmunk with raw fish and seaweed.

Location: in fronta my desk, under a deadline
Mood: rushed
Music: I have stood here before inside the pouring rain
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dating personal

Need the darkness, someone please cut the lights

Clock in midtown, NYC

Got a number of nice comments from friends that read my last Technorati entry as to Why Wednesday is the Best Night for a First Date. Tell me what you think.

———-

Was running around the city again last week when a client called me and asked me to come over. His dad passed away and he wanted my help addressing a few things. Told him I would, so that kills any free time mighta had this month and maybe next.

It’s a terrible thing to think but if the father had to pass, 2010 is the best year for a rich person to do so cause there’s no estate tax.

Course, that’s on a purely pragmatic basis; on a personal level it’s always too early for a loved one to go, yeah?

Been thinking a lot about life and death these days. Maybe it’s the weather.

Saw my aunt and cousin for lunch Saturday – also work related. My aunt told me that when she first came here at 21, she stayed, along with three other people, in my parent’s two-bedroom. That made seven people in a one-bedroom. She said she never forgot my family’s kindness. Felt pretty good about that.

Told them about my family’s name, Luo. It turns out that China just forced another of my “relatives” to have a abortion at eight months. Reason #2,234,645,549 why I hate China.

As for me, came home and filled out the life insurance paperwork that’s been sitting on my desk for a month. Kept putting it off. I’m not that old and I don’t need 50 year old male life insurance, but I figure better safe than sorry and to have a policy of some sort. Afterward, called my pop.

Me: …so then she said that there were seven of us in the apartment.
Him: (laughing) Were there? I don’t remember. Oh, we were poor back then.
Me: Yeah. It was a long time ago.

Wish I had more time to write.

Then again, when I had time to write, wished I had more scratch.

They heard me singing and they told me to stop
Quit these pretentious things and just punch the clock
These days my life, I feel it has no purpose
But late at night the feelings swim to the surface

Location: my newly cleaned room
Mood: run down
Music: I need the darkness, someone please cut the lights
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business personal

Brian Regan, Thanksgiving part 1, Drama, and Cars on Demand

Tickets to Brian Regan in NYC

Me: Do you wanna fool around?
Her: No.
Me: (10 minutes later) Do you wanna fool around?
Her: How many times are you going to ask me that?
Me: Evidently twice.

Finished up 95% of that crazy batch of work. It’s a good feeling when you’ve finished up a large project.

On Friday, decided to buy my office some beers so I brought a half-case of small batch brews in. Turned out to be fortuitous cause our law clerk passed the bar and I got another major client. So the bosses picked up some Maker’s Mark and champagne and we pounded until it was time to go home. Sobered up with the girl in front of Iron Man 2.

Saturday, HG got us tix to catch Brian Regan at Lincoln Center. It was a perfect night and he was hilarious.

He’s onea the inspirations behind this blog. He doesn’t curse at all in his set but both HG and I were frequently in tears laughing. There’re 880,000 words in the English language, and it’s not the words you use but the manner in which you use them that makes you a good artist. It’s easy to toss around an expletive here and there and sometimes it’s funny.

Most times, it’s just lazy.

Sunday, went to see HG’s family for an early Thanksgiving – her bro’s in town and won’t be able to come for the actual date. We’re in the DriveMint program which’s like a NYC-centric ZipCar service; they had more garages near us so we picked them over Zip.

Anywho, the @#$@#$ who had our car before us left it BONE-DRY. Our car conked out in the middle of Broadway in front of Lincoln Center.

Me: Oh this can’t be good.

We managed to get it to the side of the road and called Mint. The guy we spoke to got told us to leave the car there, walk over to 59th and pick up the Mercedes sitting there, which we did. He went to go get gas and pick up the car to drive it back.

As for us, we hightailed it out to HG’s family place; we lost like an hour but gained a Mercedes. The stuffing was great – both the noun and the verb.

Afterward, we played some modified Trivial Pursuit 80s version. I did the best, which is understandable since I was the only one that could remember the 80s.

Me: I just wanted to call to say how much I appreciated how you handled the situation earlier. If it was done any differently, you would have lost a customer.
Him: Thanks for being so understanding.
Me: It wasn’t you that caused the problem but you took ownership of it and came up with a solution. I respect that. I’d like to send an email to your company to tell them that how you dealt with me and the situation professionally and quickly.
Him: (laughing) I’m actually a partner in the business. But thanks, I appreciate it.

Location: yest., driving down route nine
Mood: still full
Music: you too and stuff
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