Stay, Gold

Ended up bringing my wife to the emergency room again this past week. Was hoping to avoid it but we didn’t have a choice.

Stay Gold

Gold Statue
My dad told me a story once of a man who had a block of gold. He buried it in his yard and would dig it up periodically to admire it before burying it again.

One day, someone stole it and the man was inconsolable. But his friends told him to paint a rock gold and look at that. Because he didn’t use the gold, there really wasn’t a difference between a piece of gold and rock painted gold.

The moral of the story was that money has value only when it’s used properly. But I always thought it a weird story – the man knew what was real gold and what was paint.

Ended up bringing my wife to the emergency room again this past week. Was hoping to avoid it but we didn’t have a choice.

I’ll simply say that this time, I didn’t collapse to my knees but it was still pretty horrible. Waiting to find out more information and the waiting is excruciating.

I’m a lawyer, amongst other things. Not a doctor nor a nurse. I’m not qualified to do much of what I’m actively doing now. But I’m also an auto-didactic.

And the thing I need to figure out is how to save my family. Amazingly, Alison is not the only person in my life with a life-threatening aggressive cancer. In fact, there are three people I love in my life with life-threatening illnesses.

All of which seem to be reaching their nadir at once.

I think I’m of above-average intelligence. Figure most people think the same about themselves.

Yet, what’s the point of all the intelligence in the world if I cannot use to save my family? It’s like that guy with the piece of gold – all my intelligence is useless if I can’t use for the only thing that I care about in this rotten world.

Ever read The Outsiders? There was a kid there named Ponyboy that read a poem called Nothing Gold Can Stay.

So Eden sank to grief,
So dawn goes down to day.
Nothing gold can stay.

His friend Johnny implored him to “stay gold” in a world that’ll hollow out anything of value in you.

In my tin life, my family is only thing of any real value and they are all suffering. The only thing I want is for them to somehow stay.

I have to figure out a way to make that happen.



Location: heading to the east side
Mood: weak
Music: I want it real. Run away with me now

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12 replies on “Stay, Gold”

Don’t know enough to try and be helpful, so I apologize if I’m sending you on a wild chase. There are five trials showing on City of Hope’s website. Worth checking out?

Also, Blaze Bioscience may be of interest:
Don’t know how far along they are on their research.

Thanks for reaching out – unfortunately, she’s barely able to travel crosstown, let alone cross-country. We’re hoping that may change in the not-too-distant future but only time will tell.

We have never met however, I have many family members who have been affected by cancer. I have volunteered at City of Hope cancer hospital on and off for years and also noticed the many trials they are conducting. Not sure if any would be helpful but just thought I also would mention this to you. I live very near the hospital and if anything can work for you I would be more than happy to gather info or help out in any way possible. You can email me anytime.

Thanks for sending this – I looked and there’s no specific trials that she’s suitable for right now, which is the nature of clinical trials. Finding one that she might be able to partake in is a full-time job in itself.

Logan, I see that family and friends have fund-raising activities in place. if you have not yet done so, consider applying for Social Security disability for your wife. It can be done online and glioblastoma is one of the “fast track” diseases that gets priority approval for disability benefits. My husband was diagnosed with glioblastoma in Oct 2014 and passed away in Oct 2015. . If you would like to reach out, you can contact me 908-725-7811.

Hello Logan. You don’t know me, but I felt compelled to write a little note to you. We lost my nephew to glioblastoma. He was just shy of his 4th birthday when he passed. I pretty much consider this disease a monster that needs to be stopped. Apparently, my nephew did not qualify for any trials because he was so young, which was very frustrating. I feel your pain all too well. But never lose hope. That hope is stronger than this stupid disease. And remember that Johnny wrote a letter to Ponyboy before he passed away. Along with explaining his thoughts on ‘stay gold,’ he also told him ‘there’s still lots of good in the world.’ I know the darkness is all around you right now, but I am praying for good days for you, your family and your wife. The good is out there and I’m hoping it finds you. Don’t give up hope.

Logan: I read about your wife’s plight in the newspaper today and I believe that there is a viable and realistic ready protocol that has a great promise for completely helping her cure herself . I live nearby in Basking Ridge and would like to explain this protocol in detail because it sounds too good to be true and need an in depth explanation and it has been PROVEN to eliminate cancer without intrusion and at little or no cost in dollars or time. Please contact me or 908-647-5179.

I understand your are a fighter that leaves no stone unturned so please hear me out -its time that Alison gets treatment that works!!!!! I truly and sincerely believe this will help

Doug Wicks Basking Ridge NJ

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