Category: personal

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personal

Secret Project II

Location: 22:30, yest., hitting something on 72nd
Mood: better
Music: I don’t care…As long are you’re here

A brief break from Bachelor Cooking, just to keep you on your toes. Thanx to Seemore for putting our last vid up on her cooking page; to ouijacat for sending me the above and prodigallyyours for her nice words – I was feeling craptastic because I spoke to my grandmother recently.

Me: Something’s come up. I can’t come.

Her: It’s been almost five years. (long silence) You promised.

Me: I know, (clearing throat) I know.

I felt murderous but Johnny’s traveling and Bryson’s busy so I spent Saturday working with my coach, Koshen. I also just walked in from fencing. Y’ever just wanna break stuff?

Man, I wanna break stuff.

———-

Seemore reminded me that I’ve got a project in my head. Remember the last insomnia driven project I had? It turned out well, I thought, and now I need volunteers again. Involves drinking so drinkers and foodies welcome.

More practical than art. If you wanna help, shoot me an email: logan607 at hotmail.

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personal

Bachelor Cooking III

Location: finally back home
Mood: freezing
Music: I foresee terrible trouble And I stay here just the same

I should note that I (a) really needed a haircut, (b) was wearing a REALLY large tee-shirt and (c) I had little sleep before the shoot. But I thought it was funny, even if I look terrible.

This week, I’m posting nothing but vids – no pics.

———-

I worked most of the weekend however I did venture out at night. Friday was a story in itself but I ended walking some two miles home in the cold just because I was awake. For a moment I almost called someone that I knew I shouldn’t but by then I was already sober. Just as well.

Saturday, I spent about four hours in the gym. I met up with in_a_silver_bag at night because she was in town. She and her friend were troopers and braved the freezing cold to have some of my favorite aged rum with me.

She told me that I was pretty much like I am in my blog. I think that’s a good thing.

Sunday I saw Rain, L and company for a short holiday party after church. It was good to see them again if only for an hour.

There’s never time enough.

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personal

A Bachelor, cooking (Ep. II)

Location: 17:00, walking in the rain
Mood: wide #@$@$ awake
Music: I try, I try Never gonna fall for modern love

For those of you that never saw these, especially my two readers that I know could use a laugh. If you like it, please forward this vid. I’m trying to convince Rain that we should do it again. Lemme know if it makes you laugh. It was the start of Lorin and Ray and 72nd to Canal.

Yes, I know the sauce was runny. We were running outta time.

I had to get to the church on time.

———-

I think too much. It’s one of the problems with constantly being awake. That’s why I’m always looking for a distraction. I’ve got an idea for another secret project and, like last time, I’ll need your help. Details next entry. But until then, I’ve got to find some other way to entertain myself.

The German girlfriend was awesome in this regard because at 2AM it was her 8AM and we’d chat as she drove to work. Funny what you miss, huh? But I digress. I’m knee-deep in lawsuits, charts, spreadsheets and documents so a girlfriend is not in the cards at the moment.

However, I’ve got fresh strawberries in the fridge and a pot.

I think I’ll make a compote.

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personal

Miss

I’m right

I’ll be posting a lot less these days. I’m so insanely busy that I may have torpedoed yet another perfectly fine relationship. One day, I’m gonna run outta chances. I’ve already run outta rum.

In A Few Good Men: Lt. Daniel Kaffe says, upon entering a courtroom, “So this is what a courtroom looks like.”

Recently, I stepped into a courtroom for the first time since law school. My opposing counsel was a young woman. I remember when she walked in, I thought, She’ll be the one I go against and I was right.

Her: Where’s your lawyer?Me: I’m representing myself – I’m a lawyer. I’m actually…
Her: (interrupting) Whatever. Did you file your notice of appearance?
Me: Um…that is…?
Her: (shocked) Are you ____ing me?
Me: (shaking head) No. (pause) Can I borrow your pen?
———-
Her: (disgusted) What kinda offer’s that?
Me: Miss, I may not know what to file where or what something’s called. And I sorta got lost coming here. But I know the law and I know I’m right. And you know it too. So tell your client, that’s my offer. (pause) You know I’m right, miss.
Her: (long pause, sigh) Lemme call her. 

———-

Afterwards

Her: You should be a litigator. You would do well.
Me: (shaking head) Thank you. But no. 36 months. Then I’m out.
Her: You did well. (she repeated, holding out hand) Good luck.
Me: (shaking her hand) Thank you, I’ll take it. Happy holidays, miss.
Her: Happy holidays.

Four more to go.

I walked in the door an hour ago. I’d kill for a good stiff drink right now. Or sex. Or a good fight.

Something.

Location: 30 mins ago, looking for an open liquor store, chick or a fight
Mood: tired and vicious
Music: mercy baby I do not know what this all means

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personal

Australia

A Frog in a Well Knows Nothing of the Ocean

You ever hear of the saying, A Frog in a Well Knows Nothing of the Ocean?

This frog meets a turtle one day and the frog says to him, Dude, you gotta come check out my home in a well. It’s got it all: cool mud in the summer, protection from the wind in the winter, the whole nine.

The turtle checks it out and says to the frog, Man, have you ever been to the ocean? The water goes down deeper than a thousand of your wells. And you could swim forever and never see the land again if you didn’t wanna. And there are things of every color in the rainbow that you couldn’t imagine of in your dreams.

Y’only know your well, the turtle finished, but there are oceans you know nothing about.

Prior to 2001, I was the frog. Then I met this girlie…but that’s not really the point. Sometimes, I think I still am the frog. I told someone recently that I learned to ride a bike here. That kinda stuck with me. Anyway, remember how I’ve said, There’s no such thing as a line?

It’s true. Pretty much everyone I’ve mentioned in the past month or so, I’ve been asking, You know what we need to do? We need to go to Sydney, Australia. I’m actually interested when they say they’ve been there before. I spoke with one girl about traveling for hours the other night.

At some point, someone asks, But why Australia and why Sydney?

And I answer, truthfully, Australia because everyone’s got that cool accent. And Sydney – well, it just sounds pretty.

Doesn’t it though? We should go. It’s freaking cold here. And it’s not just the weather.

Location: 9:00 yest, driving crosstown
Mood: restless
Music: Break, eject, eject, eject, break, eject, eject, eject
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Gossip Folk / More advice

Location: 16:02 yest, looking at the new office
Mood: contemplative
Music: he went about his business and devised a plan


Continuing from yesterday, someone asked me if there was a lesson to be learned from what happened to me. Here’s my answer:

Avoid gossip folk.

The woman that took my scratch was the local gossip. I thought she was harmless. Lesson learned.

When I’m out and about, I constantly see guys call a girl a hottie one second and a bitch the instant their game goes south. And that’s always when static starts and I get gone. People always cut you down with words before they cut you down with anything else.

Before it became part of WWII, the beef between China and Japan was called the Sino-Japanese War, Shina being being a racist word in Japanese. In fact, all of WWII can be seen as step-by-step escalations of evil starting with simple words.

In this blog, the only person I criticize (relentlessly) is myself. I’ve now made it a point to avoid gossip-folk, even cutting an entire raft of friends. Cause if they gossip about others, they gossip about you. And if they gossip about you, they don’t respect you. And if they don’t respect you, well then…

I think evil people can’t help it. They can hide everything else, but the gossip. The one scene I remember from JHS reading Julius Caesar was where Cassius starts it all up by leaning over to Brutus and whispering, The fault, dear Brutus, is not in our stars, But in ourselves, that we are underlings.

I should have known better. I should have paid attention in seventh grade English class.

Avoid gossip folk. That’s my advice.

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personal

Only one end

Location: 2 hours ago, on Broadway, remembering
Mood: ok
Music: I will show you someone that you never thought you’d be

Helen Keller said that Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet.

She was on the money. Oh, speaking of Helen Keller, click here for a short video I made a while ago.

Anyway – I woke up mad early and hopped to court again. I got what I wanted but that’s a story for another time. I couldn’t celebrate because I had to run to the office and land a client. Then I got a shut-off notice from ConEd and the contractor for my new office wants another $6,000. It’s always something.

The thing is, you gotta keep bobbing ‘n weaving. My dad told me recently, there’s really only one end, everything else is an opportunity. I hope he’s right.

I ran out the door at five today to make a massive holiday party with some killer food. There I met a pretty blue-eyed dancer whom I feel now I should’ve asked for her number but instead, I gave her mine.

Afterwards, I had coffee with two recent college grads and a girl in college at a diner on 34th near where I met Blue Jean Eyes. Old ghosts. I told them to save 10% of everything they ever made, learn a foreign language, meet as many people as they could, and see the world.

I wish someone told me that last one when I was in college.

Yes, yes, yes, yes, I do (now).

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personal

Logan the Suit

I meet someone new every night

 

Was in an office all day yesterday so there’s no excitement there. And I’m in court today.

I’ve become that which I always never wanted to be (again): a suit, running after a check.

———-

That’s a pic I took at like 4AM on the red line going downtown from this past weekend. A good bunch of females ‘n fellas.

I think I’ve said it before: I don’t have a problem meeting people, I have a problem connecting with people.

Her: (non·plussed) You meet people every weekend? I don’t believe that.
Me: (shrugging) It’s true.
Her: Who’d you meet this weekend?
Me: You.

Smooth right? Don’t be impressed; as an ex once said, I’m a talker (glattzüngig).

It only lasts for as long as it lasts.

Location: on a flower-print sofa, plotting
Mood: pensive
Music: I’m not perfect I wanted to be I have this big mouth It always contradicts me

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personal

Yet here we are

Location: 20:30 yest, in my apartment wondering, what if
Mood: resigned
Music: Lord listen lover you’re all missing something I don’t got

What a day. But I made payroll.

I worked the weekend but met up with some friends and the two girls I met from Boston, Anna and W. I usually ask people to draw a picture of themselves if they give me their number – those’re their drawings from when we met. They were actually some of the last pics I ever got; I decided a while ago to stop asking for numbers and instead just give out mine. I figure if someone wants chat to with me, they will.

But I digress. It was nice to see them again.

W: I never thought we’d meet again.

Me: And yet here we are.

Speaking of random meetings, on Saturday, I went to my first 2007 holiday party in Harlem. At 3AM, a bunch of us decided to call it a night and we walked over to the subway. But it was closed. So we hoofed it a half-mile downtown to the next station. I didn’t know any of them when the night started but there we were dashing down 5th Avenue at an ungodly hour.

Something to remember when I’m an old man.

Me: I find it hard to believe that you don’t meet anyone in NYC. A pretty single girl here’s like chum in shark-infested waters.

Her: (laughing) I’m not a man-whore like you.

Me: I don’t see what the problem is. And you have such nice green eyes.

Her: (surprised) You noticed my eye color?

Me: Yeah, (nodding) it’s my thing.

I had a nice weekend. And yet here we are.

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personal

Theme Song

If your life had a theme song, what would it be?


I gotta make payroll & rent Monday so I’ll post on Tuesday. Clearly, the most logical thing would be to rob a bank.

So I’ll be busy…plotting…

———-

If your life was a TV show, what would it be it’s theme song? I got a few. But if I had to chose just one, it would be Overkill.

Like I said, the insomnia’s back; I don’t actually mind being alone between the sheets. I do mind the lying there awake though.

So I get up and go for a walk. I’ve lived here my whole life and the last several women I’ve seen have been from around the way. I’ve run into a few of them over the past several months. I got memories on every corner.

In other words, on every corner, ghosts appear and fade away.

At least there’re pretty lights.

———-

I can’t get to sleep
I think about the implications
Of diving in too deep
And possibly the complications
Especially at night
I worry over situations
I know will be alright
Perhaps it’s just my imagination
Day after day it reappears
Night after night my heartbeat, shows the fear
Ghosts appear and fade away

Alone between the sheets
Only brings exasperation
Its time to walk the streets
Smell the desperation

At least there’s pretty lights
And though there’s little variation
It nullifies the night
From overkill

Location: 13:00 yest, Paterson, NJ City Hall
Mood: indescribable
Music: at night I worry over situations