Month: October 2016, On (or Close to) Schedule

Thank you for setting her apart

Alison’s been pretty stoic about everything that’s happened. Every once in a while, though, the gravity of the situation hits her – and us.

After dinner the other day, The Scientist came on and when they got to the part that went:

Tell me you love me
Come back and haunt me

she started to cry.

Her: It’s so sad.
Me: “Come back and haunt me?”
Her: (thinking) Yes, that is sad. I try not to think about things like that. But that’s not the line that makes me so sad. It’s the one that goes, “Nobody said it was easy. No one ever said it would be this hard.” (pause) I can’t believe it’s been so hard.
Me: As long as we have 1% of 1%, we’ll keep trying.
Her: I will. I’ll always fight this.

Years ago, told you that I met a girl and set her apart from everyone else in the world. That’s what happens when you come across something or someone special.

That girl Annabel from my last entry wrote me to tell me that she hosted a fundraiser at her home to help Alison and sent us a – wholly unexpected – check. Below is a picture from the fundraiser. I only personally know one person, Annabel. And Alison knows no one.

But each of these strangers, like so many others, have gone far outta their way to help us.

There are 880,000 words in the English language. And yet there are no words to adequately express my gratitude that, in this past horrifying year, so many people have set Alison apart as well.

Suppose I’ll just have to settle for thank you, as always, however inadequate it feels to me.

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Look for the helpers

Thanks for helping

Went on a kinda roadtrip this past weekend. Was the first time I’d been out of New York City since this entire thing went down with Alison.

We needed a washer/dryer, you see. The laundrymat around the way just closed and having a kid and a sick wife means laundry. Lots of laundry.

A woman was selling her ten-month old set out in NJ but I’d no means of getting to her. So I asked on FB if there was anyone I could hire to move it for me.

A friend-of-a-friend named Phil immediately said he’d pick me and bring me over. A few hours later, was in the car with a relative stranger on the way to another stranger’s house in New Jersey to either pick up a washer/dryer or get stabbed. It was the former, luckily.

Phil helped me haul this monstrosity out of this lady’s house. As we struggled in the rain to get it into Phil’s car, the lady started to cry. She was moving cause she had to, not cause she wanted to and couldn’t take this thing with her.

I told her not to cry, that she’d be ok. She smiled and told me I would be as well. Let’s hope we don’t make liars of each other.

After a slow drive back into the city, Phil and a neighbor helped me haul this thing into my home. Tried stuffing $100 into Phil’s glove compartment but he wouldn’t take it and just took off with a smile and a wave.

Spent the rest of the day moving it into place with the help of some other neighbors and hooking the whole thing up. Was late when it was all over.

Fred Rogers used to tell children that, when they were frightened, to “Look for the helpers.”

Alison’s cancer has been many things, all of which were anxiety producing.

And anxiety is just a fancy word for fear.

But the helpers have made it better – friends, strangers, and family.

You know, this girl named Annabel shows up at my doorstep every Wednesday with some insanely good homemade food she cooks. And a fella named Anthony brings food from his restaurant every Thursday. And then there’s a girl named Kristin comes over a couple of times a week to do PT with Alison. They were strangers to us.

Plus we have friends like Rain, who just built me something to make the washer work better and Alison’s best friend Lacey, who sends someone to watch the kid almost every day.

It’s all been frightening. But the helpers make it less so.

Her: Who was that?
Me: Someone who wanted to help us.
Her: That’s really nice of him.
Me: It is. It really is. Get some rest.

\’

Location: last weekend, the West Side Highway going 10 mph
Mood: slightly less anxious
Music: I fight. Now I’m away

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