I’m sick.
My brother sent me the following to keep me entertained – they’re six word stories:
http://wired.com/wired/archive/14.11/sixwords.html
My favorite is by Margaret Atwood: “Longed for him. Got him. Shit.”
Halloween’s coming up – it’ll actually be my first Halloween as a single guy since…well a long damn time.
S__t
Location: Propped up in bed/futon watching CSI
Mood: Sick
Music: won’t get fooled again
Saturday night, I went out to see a band play in Brooklyn, which ended up being hella fun. Course, had to up and ruin the night for myself.
Everything was going fine until we hopped a cab back into the City and ended up at a pizza joint downtown. I sitting to the side and when this very attractive blond comes in and sits down next to me. I’m not sure how we started talking but I find out that she’s from Florida, works with on a network program and is recently divorced. Somehow got her to also trade driver’s licenses with me and I realize that she’s six years younger than me. And divorced! Crazy.
We’re chatting a bit more and then she tells me that she’s going to eat more pizza. Scoff and tell her that women always think they can eat a lot but they never can, to which she tells me, “I can eat you under the table.” She goes and gets another slice and it’s just then my friends decide to leave. When she gets back, I’ve got my jacket on. Here’s the rest of the conversation:
Her: Oh, you’re leaving?
Me: Yeah, my friends are going.
Her: Do you go everywhere your friends go?
Me (wait for it): Well, we’re catching a cab uptown so, yes.
*sigh*
Did take down her number and I’m debating if it’s worth calling her at this point.
Oh who am I kidding – I’m calling…
20061024 UPDATE – Check that; I’ve lost her number.
I’m my own worst enemy.
Location: @8:15 – half breath, sight, pull
Mood: Silly
Music: the colors mix together to grey and it breaks her heart
Today was a pretty exciting day – mainly because Rain and I had our first batch of auditions and two people that I brought absolutely nailed the parts.
Also got a piece of horrific news today too but I suppose I’ll start with the good and end with the bad.
With the auditions, Rain’s group was good and there was some talent there but the last two people that came in were spot on. The only problem was that they are both auditioning for the same role. We’re contemplating writing a part just for one of them so that we can use them both somehow. I spoke with Rain afterward and we’re both beyond jazzed with how everything is coming together. Freaking exciting…
Drove Tony and Francis out to Queens because I needed to pick something up from Queens. When I arrived, noticed a friend left me a voicemail. He told me that a good friend of ours just found out this morning that he has a brain tumor! Couldn’t believe it. He just got married a month ago and I just saw him yesterday. It was quite a shock and very sad. I’m worried about him and his new bride.
I’ll say a prayer for them tonight and hope for the best.
Location: @10:45 – on the LIE
Mood: Thoughtful
Music: running to the edge of time, the moon will keep us company
Went out with some friends the other night and I met a girl who recognized me from years ago. She’s 24 years old and an art director now but it turns out that she went to the same church as No. 3. Moreover, some 10 years ago, she was in my apartment, when I was 23 and No 3. was 22, and had a “sleep-over/retreat” of some sort. Vaguely remember it. She was 14 at the time. Felt old.
So very old.
My friend signed his divorce papers yesterday; it’s sad because I was part of his wedding and I thought it would last. It actually the third wedding that I was part of that ended in divorce. I spoke to him today and he said he was fine (he sounded fine) but it was still sad to hear. His best friend dropped me a line about the situation too; it was good to hear from him. It’s good having friends that worry about you.
Speaking of which, my ex contacted me this week. It was the first contact we’ve had with each other for two months. Nothing angry or kind or anything. Just business. She wanted to tell me that my health insurance would run out at the end of this month (I’m currently on her plan) and she would like me to spin off her mobile phone (she’s currently on my plan).
Hadn’t thought about it or her for a bit. Well, that’s not entirely true. Try not to think about it or her.
Dunno…for me, it’s a little like signing divorce papers.
How disappointing.
Location: @ 3:00 – having a burger on Grand Street
Mood: disappointed
Music: Hol fuer dich den Stern vom Himmel
I was reading this article about the Amish girls that were killed the other day. The first to die was a 13-year old named Marian Fisher who asked “Shoot me first.” Her younger sister Barbie then said “Shoot me second.” Barbie survived. The thing is that that these kids never watched TV nor movies – they didn’t learn to be brave by why some actor taught them. They just were brave.
It’s hard being a Christian in the city – I admit, enjoy my sinful life a bit more than I should. But these are people who are at peace, even when they’re not.
It’s also hard having faith and being brave. I’m 20 years older than that girl was and half as brave (if that).
Maybe I just need a little more faith.
Location: @ 2:something – snapping this pic
Mood: Hopeful
Music: take these lies and make them true somehow
I had a bit of a mind warp today.
Today the Yankee’s pitcher Cory Lidle slammed a plane into the side of a building in the Upper East Side. I remembered all of 9/11 again. I still can’t believe it was five years ago. Today was 10/11 so it was freaky. Poor guy just wanted to fly.
Rain doesn’t have a TV so he called me for details. I also called my family – I don’t know, just because…
I’m always surprised at how I’m still surprised by anything anymore.
11:57:36 PM
The sun setting this past weekend at a much nicer latitude than where I am right now.
Rain Noe and I are working on a script for a series that we’ve got in mind for the Internet and we had a table reading on Friday. I wasn’t used to the script so we went through it again tonight and I’m more comfortable with it. It feels good to work on things that aren’t money or relationship related – something I’ve not had a chance to do in a while.
A friend of mine was in town on Saturday so we went out to a club – there was some interesting entertainment there so I recorded it and put it up in the “Video” section.
Sunday I was out in Queens and then back in the city for church. Church was fine but on the way out I thought about No. 6. It was weird because I’d been so busy these days that I hadn’t thought about anything but my projects. I thought of her because I would always call her on the way home to ask if she wanted anything from the supermarket.
I ducked in anyway to pick up some things for myself and ran into the manager whom I’m friendly with. He said hello and, noticing the small amount of food I was buying, asked, “That’s all?”
“Yeah,” I said, “that’s all.”
Location: @11PM – 1 train Canal Street Station
Mood: Okay
Music: Wo yuan yi wei ni
The N train at 3AM with most passengers sleeping – not that I’m jealous.
I remember that I used to take the train to and from high school – it took me an hour-and-a-half each way. Back then, the trains were covered in graffiti and filled with older people working their way through life.
Now the graffiti is gone and I’m one of the older people working his way through life. At least I dress better now.
I think.
Location: Back in NYC
Mood: drained
Music: it might sound strange but I wish it would rain
It’s been another blur of a weekend. I actually managed to sleep some last night although I don’t think enough. My hands have been shaking like a crack addict on withdrawal.
Ricky had his birthday party last night and I saw him and the rest of the guys. I would have stayed longer (there was a very cool girl I was talking to when I was leaving) but I had agreed to meet Rain downtown so I left at midnight or so.
I’m glad I went, though, because I met another nice girl who’s studying to be an actress and it turns out that we both go to the same church (although at different locations). I offered to give her a lift back home if she wanted to swing by my upper west side church but she had to call me, which she did this morning. She couldn’t make it this Sunday but we agreed to do it next Sunday. She has a nice web page of her own for her career so it was part of what prompted me to get cracking on finishing up my page.
I would type more but my hands keep shaking. I’m going to try and get some sleep. I’m flying back upstate this week for more boring work.
———-
I’ll now be at these two places:
http://logan607.livejournal.com
http://www.loganlo.com
location at 14:45: on 28th Street, playing “whoosh”
mood: awake
music: there must be an angel
I can’t believe it’s Sunday already. It’s been a pretty busy week.
Wednesday night I saw the film My Life…Disoriented but it’s actually only a 26 minute television show that will be showing on PBS on December 26, 2006. It was actually pretty good. I remember that when I went there, I was worried because I was only one of about seven people in the audience but then it started filling up with people (although it was still only half full). It was an interesting story about two girls that move from San Fran to a small town where there are few Asians. Afterwards, there was a Q&A; discussion that I felt was really helpful for the show that Rain and I are working on. Afterwards, we went to the afterparty where I met the main writer and a few of the stars, including the main girl who, despite playing a convincing high-schooler, assured me she was a lot older – it was funny because within ten minutes of talking to her, she told me that she had a steady boyfriend in Taiwan (who’s Jewish but studying there). I thought that was amusing.
Kirk came by afterwards and then so did Rain. They asked me, as a dare, to ask the bartender for her number, which I did and got. Nice enough girl but not my type. I got home just after one, walking home from 58th and 1st. Interestingly, it was the same place that Alan had his Xmas party and I went with No. 6. Oddly enough, I didn’t really think of her there.
On Thursday I went to the German meetup in Queens with Francis, who called me up late and asked if I wanted to grab a beer with him. I told him I was going to Queens anyway and would give him a lift back. We went to this cool beer garden in Astoria where we ate some burgers and a sausage and drank some beer. Francis wasn’t really into it so we left early and I went home.
Friday I spent the entire day working. Korean-girl called me on my mobile, I think a little tipsy, and asked me when I was visiting her in Europe. I would like to travel but the timing isn’t good.
I drove into the city where I met up with Rain and Kirk again for a bar party. It was fun and I met a lot of people including another girl named Olivia. Two in three days and zero for three decades. Weird.
Last night, I met up with Rain and Kirk again. I was in Rain’s neighborhood because Big Dave was in town and he, his wife and his mother were in Little Italy going to the Feast of San Gennaro. I went after going to the gym and met up with them; the crowds there were almost impossible. Afterwards, Rain and I went to Pho Bang near his house – ate way too much. Cindy called me and we all met up, along with Kirk, at a bar on 2nd Ave between 12th and 13th.
The crowd there was kinda lame – the quantity of people, the layout, the humidity and the volume of the music made it unpleasant to hang out. I did meet one nice girl but a friend of mine made it difficult to talk more with her via two moves my friend made (the weird thing is, I actually just wanted him to snap out of his depression and just get used to talking to people).
Move 1
He went up to his friend and essentially said, “My friend (me) wants to meet your friend (her).” So it was essentially a non-introduction because he made it such that there were only three options and results:
It may have ended up being “3” (purely by luck and because she’s just a nice girl) because I just rolled my eyes, sighed and talked to her.
Move 2
She invited us to go to a bar afterwards but he killed that too because he said he wanted to go – and guys have to stick together. So eye roll number two, and we’re off.
Oh well, moving on¦
Ricky had called me previously so I met up with him, Kathy, Edgar, Esther and a bunch of other people at Ave A and 6th at another karaoke bar. It’s always good to see them. Such a good group of guys. Kathy had encouraged me to ask for the number of the girl that lives around me but I told her last week that I was too depressed to contact her but now I wish I took her advice. As Gio says, “What’s wrong with meeting someone for a cup of coffee?”
So true.
Bettina had called me (or vice versa – we’ve been playing phone tag) at 4 in the morning. I was exhausted but I’m always happy to hear from her. She’s got drama of her own with her own random guy issues. I wanted to talk to her more about it but I was beat so I told her I would call her today.
Today I woke up, thought about No. 6, chatted with Hazel and then took the train to my improv class. Great time as usual.
I just took another PHQ-9 test – scored a 5. Hmm, things are looking up.
Location: Apartment, as usual
Mood: exhausted
Music: we’ve got stars directing our fate