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Hanging with Andy, Rob, and the Firecracker, Pt 1

Seeing a concert

Me: Can’t on Thursday. I’m catching Matchbox 20 with the Firecracker.
Brother: Matchbox 20? Shouldn’t they be at least Matchbox 50 by now?

The last major music concert I went to was 16 years ago with Alison at the Prudential Center, just a year after it first opened.

That’s because there aren’t a ton of artists I’d wanna see in exchange for the hassle of getting to and from a concert.

I’m fully embracing my inner crotchety-old-man.

When I first met the Firecracker, told her that Matchbox Twenty / Rob Thomas and Andy Grammer were the only people that I’d see but that list has grown somewhat to also include:

But that girl pays attention.

She told me that Andy Grammer was opening up for Matchbox Twenty at the Prudential Center the other day, and she got us tickets.

Her: AND…I got us seats with unlimited food!
Me: What?!
Her: Yup!

See, Matchbox Twenty and Rob Thomas’s Streetcorner Symphany was on repeat during my first breakup with the Reporter.

And after Alison got sick, his song Her Diamonds would always make me cry.

Ergo, I was super jazzed to see them both on this double-header.

So, last Thursday, we headed out to see him from Manhattan…

…but ended up taking the wrong PATH train in NJ, so we had to hitch an Uber.

Her: I don’t wanna miss Andy Grammer!
Me: (waving hand) Nah, they never start on time.

He started right on time.

Opens mouth. Inserts foot.

As soon as we walked in, we heard him playing Fine by Me, one of our favourite songs.

But, while the Firecracker was anxious to get seated to enjoy the concert, I had other priorities.

She wasn’t joking about the unlimited food.

Ended up getting five plates of food and four full cups of drinks before the night was over.

Six plates if you count that the Firecracker got us dessert at the end.

Andy: I’m like the golden retriever of music and I’m ok with that.

Anywho, getting back to the concert, I particularly like Andy Grammar, not just because I enjoy his music, but also because he and I seem to share a similar point of view when it comes to our art.

His music routinely gets criticized because its relentlessly upbeat.

Yet, I don’t have an issue with that because, what is life if not a tragedy fulla joy?

We can focus on the tragedy part or the joy part.

In any case, I just missed seeing Andy in concert a while ago with RE Mike a couplea years back, so this was a chance to finally get to see him perform.

He didn’t disappoint.

Her: Man, he’s so good, live!
Me: He really is! (getting up to get more food)
Her: You’re getting more food? You’re missing the entire concert.
Me: The food’s not gonna eat itself!

I’ll wrap this up in the next entry.

Location: sick at my desk
Mood: see above
Music: I know it’s hard to remember sometimes but you gotta keep your head up (Spotify)
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Another year done

Summer Vacation Begins

The weekend before his last week of school, I took him to hang out with Steele and the Surgeon at another trampoline park.

Went there mainly for the food.

Evidently, so did he.

Afterward, we ended up having ice cream by my old gym.

Him: Is that chocolate?!
Me: Maybe.
Him: Can I lick it?
Me: I guarantee you, it’ll be super gross.

The Firecracker was also dealing with the start of summer.

But this also meant her summer work party, which was held just two blocks from my pad.

Her: No one ate the wings, so…
Me: I’ll take care of it…them.

Also ordered a pina colada.

No umbrella, though.

Me: When we leave these doors, you won’t be coming back for…THREE…WHOLE…MONTHS!
Him: Here I go…I’m done!
Me: (laughing) Yes. One more year down.

The kid just finished another school year.

There’s something weird in our brains where years 1-20 seem to take forever, but then the same years 21-40 sprint by.

41-51 has been a blur.

The kid is growing up so fast and I can’t keep up.

Wish so much that I could slow things down.

I wish a lotta things.

On the last day of school, picked him up 20 minutes early to take him out to NJ for him to catch a flight and to start his summer.

Me: Man, I’m gonna miss you!
Him: (rolling eyes) It’s just gonna be a few weeks, papa.
Me: I know…but still.
Him: I’ll be back soon.
Me: OK.

Location: home, without the kid. It’s not the same
Mood: sick and a bit melancholy
Music: And it’s a circle, circling around again, it comes around again (Spotify)
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Meeting friends

My brain just glitched

Him: Hey! Any chance we could meet up a little earlier tomorrow? Say 10 vs 11?
Me: Sure!
Him: Perfect, see you then! I’ll be the gray-haired guy with the 6’ tall sixteen-year-old.

My buddy Danny came by with his kid the other day. He moved to Texas ages ago.

Don’t think I’ve seen him since this entry waaaay back in 2007, far before his daughter was born and before he had grey hair.

I gave them a quick tour of the Upper West Side before I had to run back for some zoom meetings.

Gotta say, I think about stopping this blog alla time but then I’m reminded how nice it is to have a place I can just remember things.

Me: His daughter really was six-foot tall.
Her: You know, one of these days, the kid and all his friends are gonna be taller than you.
Me: (…)
Her: (laughing) You ok?
Me: My brain just glitched.

Him: I’m glad we could meet up! And you’re right by my sister.
Me: It is the upper BEST side, after all. (stopping in the middle of the street) Hold on…
Him: Everything ok?
Me: Yeah. (pointing down) That’s a baseball imbedded into the street and thought it was interesting enough to take a pic of. (shrugging) It’s kinda what I do.

I’ve also been having some zoom classes for a physcian that lives in Pittsburg. He’s also a former boxer that’s gotten really into kali and reached out to me to see if we could do private zoom classes.

So, for the past few months, I’ve been teaching him here and there.

He randomly ended up like two blocks from my home the other day so we met up for a cuppa joe.

Whenever possible, I always try to make time for people if they’re willing to head up to where I am.

After all, I never know when – or even if – I’ll ever see them again.

Location: watching Rob and Andy sing in Newark
Mood: entertained
Music: If you would leave it’d be a crying shame (Spotify)
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Hating people

Not alla them

Me: I’m gonna fucking punch them both in the face and then call the cops.
Her: Then they’ll be dealing with you and not her.

Olivia’s death definitely messed with me a bit this past week.

But so did another very disturbing thing that also took my breath away.

See, Firecracker and I were sitting in a park and this little Asian girl went running to her mother…with a CLEARLY compound fracture in her arm.

It was dangling off her elbow like a limp noodle. Both the Firecracker and I gasped when we saw it.

Any idiot could see that this kid was about to go into shock; the pain musta been insane for this 5-6 year old.

Yet BOTH parents were yelling at her and asking her what happened, as if that mattered.

And the mother started shaking the broken arm as if it was a wet towel.

Yup, you read that right. She most definitely made things worse and that girl was definitely in shock.

Almost lost my shit.

You have to call an ambulance. Now! I yelled.

But they essentially ignored me, continuing to blame the kid for having a broken arm.

The father continues to look at his phone while the mother goes to check the bus schedule.

I’m doing my level best to control my temper when the Firecracker tells me that the parents are probably overwhelmed but I don’t think so.

The kid and mom start walking, we hope, to the hospital, which is miles away while the father remains with the other two kids, casually looking at his phone.

Had to leave because I was so upset by this whole thing; was worried I’d get into a shouting match with the dad in front of his two other kids.

I hate people.

Well, not all people. Just most.

Location: my somewhat air conditioned pad with the kid
Mood: hard to explain
Music: why you gotta be so heartless I know you think it’s harmless (Spotify)
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Goodnight, Olivia

Running outta time

Years ago, I met this sweet, funny, very pretty girl who was just a bit too young for me.

But we got along really well and kept in touch here and there.

She was the girl I mentioned to you here.

The last time we spoke, we said we’d have a playdate with our kids but then life got into the way.

Life always seems to get in the way.

Found out via social media that she just died.

So, like with my friends Bobby and Kirk, Alison, and my dad, I thought Olivia and I would have enough time in life to see each other again.

I’m always so wrong.

We weren’t super close, so I don’t have any details beyond what was listed in her obituary.

So, I’ll be mostly back to normal soon, but her family doesn’t have that luxury.

I have some ideas what happened based on our last conversation, but I suppose that’s between her and me.

It hit me hard, though. Sat down after I read it. It took my breath away.

She was so young; she was a teen when we met and only 36 when she died. Like Alison.

And like Alison, she left a little kid behind, except this kid not only loved her mom, she knew – really knew – her mom.

Dunno which kid is in a worse position, actually.

But I suppose that’s irrelevant at this point.

Goodnight, Olivia.

Everything is so unfair, and I’m so sorry for that.

I wish you could have stayed.

I was 34 in this picture. She was only 36 when she died.

Location: my head, remembering my possible pasts
Mood: gutted
Music: Let’s hit the road, friend of mine, wave goodbye to our thankless jobs (Spotify)
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New Mexico came before Mexico

Plus, Germany and Switzerland don’t like debt

Me: I have all this useless information in my head for some reason. Like, which do you think came first, Mexico or New Mexico?
Her: I would think Mexico.
Me: And you would be wrong.

If social media has taught me one thing, it’s that (a) people are easily fooled because (b) we put a outsized value on common sense – but “common sense,” differs radically from one group to another.

For example, the German word for “debt” is the same as their word for “fault” and “shame” (in the sense of, “what a shame”) which tells you a lot about how they look at borrowing.

And that’s probably why Germany and Switzerland, both German-speaking nations, have the lowest home ownership rates in alla Europe.

Here in the US, it’s just common sense to strive for home ownership.

There, in Germany, it’s just common sense to never have debt.

As I see the kid grow up, it’s alarming how much certain bits of information is just taken for granted and is so often wrong:

These are all things that have the air of truth but only a tiny bit of actual truth to them.

Like all kids, he asks a million questions.

But, for some reason, when kids grow up, they stop asking questions and just assume that what they’re told is correct.

After a while, people just assume things – they don’t even need anyone to tell them stuff.

That’s why I’m hoping that the boy’ll always be curious and intellectually inquisitive.

Her: How is that possible?
Me: New Mexico was first called that in 1598 (Nuevo México) but what we now know as Mexico was never known as that until 1821; prior to that, it was known as New Spain.

Location: the Dakota bar, with a buncha school principals
Mood: floaty
Music: Man, it’s a hot one – like seven inches from the midday sun (Spotify)
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Chasing water(falls)

My Father’s Day 2024

Her: [The kid] and I have to run an errand together.
Me: What? OK…
Her: We’ll be right back.

The kid got me the below card for Father’s Day – evidently, he picked it out himself.

He also picked a $25 Domino’s gift card as well.

Woke up early to get him to jits and, when we got back, the Firecracker had made us a buncha heart-attack sammies.

The boy wanted to play in some water, so he and I, plus the Firecracker – her son was with his dad – spent a good part of the day trying to find a place where the water was on.

We walked up Columbus and into a street fair, where the kid found something to amuse himself with.

But the place we ended up at had no water.

Nor did the other places we went to.

Ended up going to three joints which were all a bust but went a solid mile south and the boy crashed a soccer game.

Somehow also got some ice pops as well.

Me: Did you say thank you?
Him: Of course!

Needed to go to the bathroom, so I walked into a restaurant ready to buy something, but no one was there.

So, I just used the facilities and then left.

Walking up, we finally found a water pad for the kid to play in, just as I heard about the horror at the water pad in Michigan.

But I was determined to have a good day with the boy and the Firecracker so I put it outta my mind as best I could.

I have that luxury; I’m sure the families in Michigan couldn’t do the same.

Him: Did you have a good Father’s Day, papa?
Me: I had you and [the Firecracker] plus a heart attack sandwich. I’m not sure what else I coulda wanted.

Location: at a picnic on Riverside, surrounded by kids and carbs
Mood: exhausted and, I’m certain, a little stinky
Music:  stick to the rivers and the lakes that you’re used to (Spotify)
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Let’s hear it for the boy

Showing up

When I was a kid, there was either no afterschool programs or my family couldn’t afford to send us, but, in any case, I never knew about the very idea of “afterschool” growing up.

For my own kid, I put him a program so I had time to work, and that was a musical production of Footloose.

Because it was his first time, he only had a bit part with one line, but he was in the cast and had to sing and dance in a number of the songs.

In any case, they had their three shows last week and I went to two of them.

My MIL, SIL, and I went to the one on Thursday; ABFF, her kids, and her sister went on Friday; the Firecracker, her niece, her sister, and I all went on Saturday.

On the one hand, it was pretty well done, I gotta say.

On the other hand, watching two of the same grade-school musicals is pretty much my limit.

The kids with parents that went to all three are pretty lucky as they, clearly, have better parents than my kid has.

On the flip side, there was this nice kid that was also in the show that waved to my kid after the last performance was over and proceeded to walk home alone.

Me: Oh man, that really bothers me.
Her: What? That he’s going home alone?
Me: Yeah – it means that no one came to see him.
Her: Maybe they came to another show.
Me: Still…

I’m confident my kid will be angry with me because there’s something about fathers and sons that means there’s always friction there, somehow.

But I hope he remembers that, whenever possible, I showed up.

Him: Thanks for coming! I was looking for you.
Me: (laughing) And you found me.

I’m pretty sure the fella on the lower left-hand corner is Tony Danza.

Quick little side story:

On the first night I went with my MIL and SIL, Tony Danza from Who’s the Boss fame sat two rows ahead of us.

We all assumed that he had a kid or grandkid in the audience but one parent told me the following – which, keep in mind, is like the game “telephone” in that you’re like hearing it from the person that heard it from the person that heard it.

Me: Does he have a kid here?
Him: I just heard him tell another parent that he was at the park the other day and some kid walked up to him, not knowing who he was, and said, “I’m in a play on Thursday, will you come and watch it?” I think that kid was asking everyone he met to come by. Anyway, Tony Danza heard this and said, “Sure!” and he actually showed up!
Me: Man, I always liked him. I hope that’s true.

Regardless, he sat through the whole thing, laughed and clapped at the right times, and left without a fuss.

What a class act.

Should mention that my brother did that picture of my kid for the back cover of the Playbill above – he’s amazing at stuff like that.

Location: at a NYC splash pad, reading about Michigan and hating people.
Mood: upset
Music: Tell me why, ain’t nothin’ but a heartache (Spotify)
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Happy Father’s Day 2024

It’s been seven years

I was just born in this picture. My kid wore what I was wearing here as well. Maybe someday, I’ll show it to you.

Mom: Your dad’s been gone seven years. Can you believe it?
Me: Not really. It feels like it was just a couple of years ago.
Her: (repeating) Seven years. Not easy, is it?
Me: No. He woulda loved seeing [the kid].
Her: Yes. That’s your dad.
Me: (nodding)

Location: at a school performance, waiting for the kid to arrive
Mood: impressed
Music: Where are all the gods? (Spotify)
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Why she said it

Cleaning up the hard drive

Firecracker: Is that a black bagel?
Me: Yeah, it’s pumpernickel.
Her: Oh, I’ve never had it before.
Me: You’ve never had it before?!
Her: You know, you do that all the time: I tell you that I’ve not had or done X and you immediately say, “You’ve never had X?!” No, Logan, I haven’t. THAT’S WHY I SAID IT!
Me: Noted. (under breath) You didn’t have to yell…

My buddy Annabel swung by my pad the other day and dropped off some gifts for the kid.

I’m always touched when someone goes out of their way to help us out or do something nice for us.

Thank goodness for the good souls.

The main problem with having such easy access to a good camera these days – after all, even the cheapest cell phone still takes pretty good shots – is that you end up with hundreds if not thousands of pictures that you really should go and clean up.

I keep having to upgrade my harddrives because I have so many pictures.

So, the other day, I started deleting pictures that either aren’t good or that I just don’t care for.

Been coming across some cool ones though.

Like the woman above obviously shooting a model shot.

Or this one below of people jumping onto the tracks to save someone.

Think he just fell in, and those two fellas jumped in to rescue him.

Again, thank goodness for the good souls, right?

Finally, the below conversation between the Firecracker and her sister made me laugh…

Location: late evening, picking up my son late from school. There’s a lot to do at the end of the year.
Mood: sleepy
Music: Christ, I’m out of my mind (Spotify)
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