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The 4th of July weekend, Pt 2

Catching fireworks with the Firecracker

Her: I’ve been here all this time and I’ve never seen the fireworks.
Me: Well, it’s not my thing but I’m sure we can figure something out.
Her: Fireworks for the Firecracker – we’ve gotta do it, Lo!

My cousin, Ras, just moved in LIC and had an outdoor space so the Firecracker and I were supposed to head there after dinner but Ras cancelled last minute.

But it was fine, we were in LIC anywho so just scouted around for a place to watch the fireworks.

For those of you not in NYC, Long Island City in Queens and Midtown East in Manhattan are the two best places to catch the Macy’s 4th of July Fireworks because they’re held on the east side.

As a native New Yorker, I’ve spent my life trying to avoid going to these things but the Firecracker’s not originally from around here, so I figured I’d take her.

First, we went to a tiny, tiny, tiny, restaurant called Carla.

Afterward, we walked around looking for a spot to catch the fireworks.

We walked for a looooooong time.

Because not every place was suitable.

Her: No, Logan Lo.
Me: Now, hear me out…

We did not go there.

We did, however, do our civic duty and killed a lanternfly nymph that we saw – first one for 2023.

We ended up walking past the gym I’d gone to while the lockdown was in place.

The streets were already insanely crowded and the Firecracker was getting a headache, so we just popped into a Thai restaurant and ordered a few drinks as well as more food.

They had paper umbrellas in their drinks.

While there, the fireworks started and everyone left the restaurant.

We were the only people there.

So, I quickly grabbed a corner table that actually had a good view of the fireworks.

It was like we had a private room.

After a bit, we decided to leave a bit early to avoid the rush.

Which was near impossible because of the crush of people around us.

But it was fine because that meant that we could watch more of the fireworks, anywho.

A friend of mine once told me that the 4th of July was for family.

This was the first 4th in a while that I’d spent with anyone in years but it definitely felt right.

Me: Maybe next year, we can just watch them at home on the television, yeah?
Her: Sure, Lo. Next year. Maybe.
Me: (nodding) I’ll take maybe.

Location: home with COVID, still
Mood: a bit less COVIDy
Music: there’s a spark in you, you just gotta ignite the light (Spotify)
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Oh, how I wish you were here

Proud of ourselves

The Firecracker was busy for most of the following day but we met up for a walk to the pier near my pad when she was free.

There was a salsa party going on so we had to fight our way through that to make it to the edge of the pier, but it was worth it.

Me: What are you thinking?
Her: These are the times where I think, I can’t believe that I live here.

This fella named Richard Ford once said, The more we see our parents fully, see them as the world does, the better our chances to see the world as it is.

The boy just got his first red stripe in BJJ, which is kinda a big deal – certainly to him, if nuthin else.

Him: LOOK, LOOK! (shows me) Are you proud of me?
Me: Of course. But that’s not as important as if you’re proud of yourself. Are you proud of yourself?
Him: (beaming) Yes!
Me: That’s the most important thing, kid. Do things that make yourself proud of yourself, not me or anyone else.

Finding that I miss my dad the most when I want to ask him things about me when I was the kid’s age.

I mean, my mom’s still around and she and I talk about these things but I wonder what my dad was thinking when I was the kid’s age and doing similar things.

Realize all the times that my dad was right – and wrong – about things. I so wish he was here to talk about it all.

If he was, I wish I could tell him that I understand now, so much more about him than I ever did.

Wish I could tell him that I loved him, still do, and always will.

I wonder if he’d be proud of me. Then again, I think I did the best I could with everything I was given.

In that sense, then, I’m proud of myself.

Still, I wish he was here.

Although, truthfully, I always wish the people I loved were here with me.

Him: You looked like this again (makes face). Were you thinking of mommy again?
Me: (smiling, shaking head) I always think of her, but at that moment, I was thinking of my papa.
Him: (hugs me) I’m sorry, daddy.
Me: Thanks, kid. You’re my faves.
Him: YOU’RE MY FAVES!
Me: (laughing, hoping that I’ll stay in his top 10 forever)

Location: getting a second free soda at a street party because the person wanted a pic of me
Mood: hollowed
Music: how I wish you were here (Spotify)
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Last min trip to NJ, then Koreatown

Thinking about my dad with girlie drinks

In a last-minute decision, I decided to bring the boy out to NJ to spend the weekend with his grandparents so that the Firecracker and I could work on a personal project of ours.

To that end, I was scheduled to head out to NJ, drop the kid off, and come right back, for an approximately 180-minute, round-trip excursion.

Welp, my luck held ever to form. Because I dropped the kid off without issue but the return trip was delayed a solid hour, so my three-hour round trip took four hours.

Once I made it back into the city, I ran to the restaurant where the Firecracker was waiting for me.

Me: I’m so sorry I’m late.
Her: It’s fine. I’m just happy to see you.

We were gonna go to a restaurant that Pac had suggested to us but the wait on that was an hour, so we just ended up going to my regular joint, Jongro – the last time I was there was with my buddy Bridget.

The Firecracker actually wasn’t all that hungry cause I was so late so it was mostly me that ate all the food.

Even that wasn’t enough, so I ordered a pancake that feeds 2-3 people and ate almost alla that myself.

Afterward, we went to a rooftop bar called K-32, right across the street.

There were only a handful of other people there because it was supposed to rain (but didn’t) so it just me and her.

Since it was just us, I ordered my fave drinks: Oversweet girly drinks made of rum.

Me: Don’t judge me for my drink. I like them like I like my women: Sweet and with fruit. Wait…
Her: (shaking head and turning to the bartender) Can you do something to make it more manly? Like put a tool belt around it or something.
Bartender: (nods) I’ll fix ya up!

There were no umbrellas.

But there was a drink in a tiki mug.

Her: Hey, these are like the mugs at your place.
Me: Yeah. They’re tiki mugs. They’re my fathers’.

We struck up a conversation with the bartender and the waiter and got onto the topic of Scenic Fights.

Me: You should subscribe.
Waiter: Wait, Scenic Fights? I’m already a subscriber!

Turns out he was already a fan and that’s why he thought I looked familiar.

The bartender was young and, because it was just the two of us, really spent a lotta time getting the drinks just right.

We actually left as the bar started filling up and were home and in bed by 11PM.

Location: 8:15 PM, with the kid, catching a train at Penn Station
Mood: hungry
Music: Now my dark days don’t phase me even a little bit (Spotify)
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A celebration and then karaoke

So funny and great

After the Hudson Yards, the Firecracker invited my brother and his girl to a celebration that she was having.

I got there first, where I met a whole buncha her friends, including another lawyer.

Him: …Yale. You?
Me: Cornell. Which, in the original Algonquin, I believe means, “Couldn’t make it into Yale.”

It was a pretty low-key thing at a local bar that I’d been to tons of times before.

Had my fill of bar food. Well, I had bar food. I coulda eaten more.

The Egyptian boyfriend of one of her friends and I got to talking about food.

Him: It’s not Egyptian but if you like shawarmas the best places are in Astoria.
Me: Way ahead of you, man.

I would honestly go to Europe just to eat shawarmas/gyros everywhere.

It was fun and everyone was nice but then it was time for us to leave.

I expected to head home afterward but my brother and his girl wanted to go to karaoke so who was I to tell them not to?

Brother: Wait, do you wanna come?
Me: Well, I don’t *want* to come but…
Firecracker: Karaoke!
Me: Yes?

So, the Firecracker and I went with them to midtown.

After just a few minutes, we found ourselves at a joint called Duet 53 where everyone sang a song and I tried to finish a huge bottle of sake.

Couldn’t do it.

My brother and his girl hung out until 6AM – hoo-boy – but the Firecracker and I called it by 1AM.

Although, she would probably had stayed out if given the option.

Her: Ready to go home, old man?
Me: God, yes…

Interestingly, on the way back home – in the middle of the night – met another couple who saw my cousin’s show on Broadway, Shucked.

She raved about it.

Woman: You have to see it now, before it wins a buncha awards and tickets are sold out everywhere.
Me: Oh, that’s high praise, I’ll definitely need to tell my cousin.
Her: And watch it! It’s so funny and great.
Firecracker: We should go see it!
Me: (laughing) Ok, ok, I’ll try to get us some tickets.

Like I always say, New York City’s like a small town a lot.

Location: Janovic paints, buying new paint for my apartment.
Mood: grateful I survived another May
Music: I’ve never lived a simple life (Spotify)
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The lady in green’s bday

A stop by a local bistro

Me: (laughing) Good god, that’s the kinda pushcart my grandma would wheel around.
Her: Look, I’m dating a grandpa, I might as well have a grandma cart.
Me: So mean!
Her: You started it! Plus, someone’s gotta get your ego down a notch.

The dinner the other night after the theme park was really just a spur-of-the moment kinda thing.

I actually planned out the Firecracker’s birthday to a French bistro around the way

Me: What do you want for dinner?
Her: Well, I love salmon. So, any place that offers that?

It turns out that she’d been to the place I picked out but she came right after COVID so they only had a tasting menu.

This was the first time that she was trying out something from the full menu.

Whenever I’m in a French bistro, I always order the mussels if they’re available – pure protein if I skip the bread (which I should do, but never do).

Her: Give me your camera, I want to take a picture with all of the steam coming off of it.

It was pretty good, I’ve gotta say.

Man, I miss Paris.

The vegetable sides were great; think I’m gonna try and make some carrot purée next time, because theirs was killer.

The Firecracker would probably agree.

Afterward, we went to the second bar that we went to on our first date.

We ordered two drinks and a dessert.

Purely by coincidence, she wore a green dress, I wore a green suit, and one of our two drinks were green.

Because it was a school night, I had to leave pretty early but it was nice to celebrate her bday with her.

Me: Technically speaking, you’re probably the oldest woman I’ve ever been serious relationship with.
Her: You’re kidding me, right?! So, you keep getting older, but the girls always stay the same age? That’s messed up, Lo.
Me: (laughing) Yeah. It’s a wonderful thing.
Her: (rolls eyes) Are you done dating children, Logan?
Me: Evidently.

Location: earlier today, making the last of Steel’s tuna
Mood: hungry – what’s new?
Music: Hey there, baby, now ain’t it the life? (Spotify)
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Hurt you so badly

Better off now

After the night out with the Firecracker and her friend, neither of us could make it to the Frenchman’s karaoke thingy the next day.

Me: (next morning) I think I’m still drunk.
Her: I need a Tylenol.
Me: Why are we even awake?!

But we were scheduled to meet up with her sister and her sister’s fella, both of whom lived across the street from her.

We ended up meeting up at a bar for an afternoon drink, not too far from the tiki bar we were the night before.

The Firecracker and I each got a rum and diet coke – plus wings for me – while they got beers and a huge pretzel for their kid, which made me think of Germany.

Her sister and fella were super cool and grabbed the bill, which was super nice of them.

Afterward, I was hungry for more wings, so we spent a solid 45 minutes walking around the hood looking for more wings, which I ultimately found.

A young couple were arguing – well, the fella was being yelled at by his girl – and the girl asked me what I thought.

Her: (turning to me) What do you think?! Am I right or is he?
Me: I’m just trying to get some wings here, lady…
Her: No, no, no, is he right or am I?
Me: (shaking head) I can’t say. I can say that communication isn’t what you’re saying but what he’s hearing. And he – and everyone else here – is just hearing you yell at him, kid.

There’s a lot more to this story but I’ll end it here.

The next day, I went out to NJ to get the boy from my in-laws.

MIL: We’re having pasta, salad, and garlic bread.
Me: I’m not saying no to any of that.

He went out with his guitar to practice and bringing it back was a bit of a pain, but worth it because he had plenty of time to practice.

As you might imagine, the Firecracker and I chat quite a bit now.

I find it odd because the weird commonality of the women I met after Alison have all had very sad stories to tell.

Wonder if it’s something about me that either attracts people with sad stories or perhaps they feel safe because I have my own – obscenely – sad stories.

Perhaps it’s a bit of both.

Me: I’m sorry.
Her: Nothing to be sorry about. I’m better off now.
Me: (shaking head) I’m sorry the world hurt you so badly, Firecracker.
Her: (nodding) I’m sorry the world hurt you so badly, Lo.
Me: Yeah…

Location: this afternoon, Blue Bottle with the pastor, disagreeing about cruising
Mood: contemplative
Music: this should be a crime and I’m ready to do the time (Spotify)
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Valentine’s Day 2023

Sneak peeks

Don’t think I’ve had a proper Valentine’s Day in years.

Not that I’ve not wanted to. It’s just that it’s not something you can do on your own.

Like I said, I’ve been trying to do things differently these days. After all, if you keep doing what you do, you keep getting what you get.

Me: You free to do something [next week]?
Her: A chance to spend time with Logan Lo? Yes, please.
Me: (laughing) Great. I’ve got a few things in mind.

Had my sitter watch the kid and had the Firecraker meet me outside of my pad.

While it’s great that the boy seems to be fine with her, I do want to try and manage how often he sees her because everything is so new.

Having said that, I brought her to a private sneak peek of a building that was just gut renovated a couplea blocks from my pad.

As soon as we walked in, someone took our coats, and within a few minutes…

Him: Chardonnay?
Me: That would be lovely – thank you very much.

She’d never been to anything like this so I showed her around a bit but she got the hang of it pretty early and was soon off doing her own thing, checking things out.

Should mention that the bathrooms at this place were nicer than my entire apartment.

Her: This shower is bigger than most rooms.
Me: We should get a place like this.
Her: Let’s do it!

In any case, I put on my old personality and started making friends.

Me: Do you have a card?
Him: (fumbling) No, I…
Me: (reaching in my jacket pocket) No worries, take one of mine. Logan. And you are…?

The Firecracker wanted to stay longer than I did, because it was all so new and fun.

But we had dinner plans.

Me: Sushi’s still good?
Her: You put that in my head, so, yes, I’m definitely up for some sushi.

I’m still trying to understand how much she eats. I’m used to eating a ton so I ordered waaaaaay too much sushi. She had a normal human’s portion while I…did not.

Her: I’m so stuffed.
Me: I’M so stuffed. That says a lot.

We actually got each other things for Valentine’s Day. What I got for her is for her and we’ll leave it that.

Me: I always slant practical versus romantic. It’s just my nature.
Her: No, these are awesome, thank you!

She, in turn, handed me a heart-shaped box. I gotta admit, I was a bit disappointed when I saw it because I don’t eat sweets. At least, not normal sweets that I don’t bake myself.

Her: It’s not what you think it is. Open it.

And I did and saw that she bought me a heart-shaped box of…dried meat products.

Her: I know you don’t eat carbs so…
Me: Holy shitballs, this is awesome!
Her: You like it?
Me: It’s perfect. Thank you.

Afterward, because she didn’t live too far from the restaurant I walked her home.

Me: Did you have a nice night?
Her: I had you, a nice event, and a great dinner. So, yes.
Me: (laughing) Good. I did as well.
Her: This wouldn’t be a bad life, Logan Lo.
Me: No, Firecracker. Not at all.

Location: this afternoon, watching the boy hit a takedown and get mount on the UWS
Mood: impressed
Music: you and me, we’re not friends (Spotify)
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The 90s-Themed Party

Dinner with my college friends

Her: Logan! (shakes head, sighs) What’s the opposite of a cougar?
Me: I dunno.
Her: Logan Lo…

It’s been super busy lately, sorry for the lack of updates.

I suppose the two things that are taking up the most of my time are: the tax increase (boo!) and the Firecracker (yay!).

I’ve not been social with too many of my old friends for reasons I’ve told you about before, but lately, that’s been changing.

For example, I’ve always wanted to introduce someone to my college friends but either no one I was dating reached that level of comfort or the people that did wouldn’t have appreciated it or them.

The last person I introduced my college friends to was Alison and that was over a decade ago.

But my friends were celebrating two of our groups birthdays and I asked if the Firecracker wanted to come along.

Me: The thing is, there might be a theme.
Her: What’s the theme?
Me: The 90s.
Her: I love it! We gotta do it.

So, we got dressed up and headed downtown to Kimika to meet everyone.

Honestly, one of the best things about her is her positivity. I didn’t realize how much negativity I’d been harbouring in my life for the past few years.

She loved Clueless as a kid so dressed somewhat similarly to Cher/Alicia Silverstone while I channeled my inner Will Ferrel from Night at the Roxbury, combined with the Rock from the 90s.

The fella over my shoulder’s Gar, whose home I went to over the summer to swim.

It was a ton of fun. The food was ridic good and I cannot tell you how many bottles of wines and glasses of rum I went through.

Although, I should comment that we were all talking about us all getting older and I had a glass of red wine in my hand and I literally snapped it in half for some inexplicable reason.

Table: LOGAN! What happened?
Her: Did you just snap that in half?
Me: Yes?
Her: Why did you do that?
Me: I didn’t do it intentionally!

I really didn’t. Suppose I’m really, really not mentally ready to turn 50.

That woulda been the end of that…had I not spilled another glass of water a few minutes later.

Table: (groans)
Me: (to Firecracker) This may explain why I don’t get invited out a lot.

For some reason, they didn’t tell me to leave. In fact, they invited us out to drinks afterward at another friend’s bar, Ms. Yoo.

Along the way, I ended up chatting with Gar’s wife, Wynn.

Her: So, I’m just watching some things on YouTube and you know what shows up?
Me: No idea.
Her: You! I get this suggested video from Scenic Fights and there’s your face!
Me: Sweeeeeeet. You’re welcome.

The bar was pretty packed with people but it was still great.

LT: Here are some cards for comped drinks.
Me: Thanks! I promise to try and not spill anything.

I really am ridic clumsy.

One of the girls there knew my cousin Ras and we commented (a) how young everyone looked and (b) how small the world was.

By that point, it was late so the Firecracker and I broke out and headed back home.

Her: Your friends are nice.
Me: I like to think so. Did you have a nice night?
Her: (nods) Yeah, I did.

 

Location: running into another kalista in a playground on the UWS
Mood: flirty
Music: Dreams are hopeless aspirations in hopes of comin’ true (Spotify)
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What we could be

Looking for green flags

Firecracker: I like you and you like me and we’re trying to see what we could be.
Me: Oh, that rhymes.
Her: I know, I said it.

While I still believe that most of my luck is of the stripe that no one wants, I do gotta say that I feel lucky that I meet so many good souls in my life.

My buddy CoB makes a number of appearances in this blog and in my life in general.

I’ll just be doing one rando thing or another and I’ll get a completely non sequitur message from her that comes outta nowhere.

Case in point, she sent me the following images while telling me about what was going on her life.

Her: Took myself out after [after an awful day]. I DESERVE A RESTAURANT WEEK LUNCH!
Me: You def do! (later) OMG, you just massively changed my dinner plans. I was going to take the Firecracker to a casual bar thingy but you reminded me that it’s restaurant week so now we’re heading to The Library at The Astor – thanks to you!
Her: Ohhhhh I love that place! Have all the funz!

I was in NJ, dropping the kiddo off at my in-laws and rushing for time. The Firecracker and I met up around me as I got ready in 10 minutes, and we headed down to Astor Place together.

Her: Are you trying to impress me with your directional skills?
Me: God, no. I would get lost in a sealed paper bag.

Neither she nor I had ever been to The Library. One massive plus of going to a nice joint is that it’s usually less crowded.

It turns out that we share a lot of the same tastes in food except for three major things:

      • Most of my diet consists of some form of peanut butter – after all, the kid and I go through close to two pounds of the stuff per week. She cannot stand the sight nor smell of it.
      • She doesn’t like Indian food.
      • She can’t handle spicy food.

Buddy: Dude, I swear to god, if you mess this up over peanut butter…
Me: How dumb do you think I am?
Him: (stares)
Me: Fair…

Finally, she’s very good at expressing herself, which I really appreciate. I think I’ve spent years talking with people but never actually communicating with them.

Her: You know, instead of looking for red flags, maybe look for green flags.
Me: Green flags?
Her: (nodding) Reasons to do this thing instead of not.
Me: Well, you do have a lotta those, Firecracker.
Her: As do you, Logan Lo.


Location: late this afternoon, getting midday drinks in midtown
Mood: always hungry
Music: If we never met, I’d be drunk, waking up in someone else’s bed (Spotify)
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Violence and Mexican with the fellas

You’re always hungry

Sorry, more out of order entries.

Been insanely busy these days, mainly with my slowly stirring social life, which itself is an entire entry.

On that note, the Frenchman and Bryson – who both know each other – stopped by my gym the other day.

It’s been ages since Bryson was at my pad last. I’m 33 in that pic in that entry.

I miss that leather jacket.

It was cool to see the Frenchman roll because a number of the gym members knew him as only as a beginning kali student and definitely not as a seasoned BJJ black belt.

I rolled with both Bryson (a brown belt) – who missed the entire class but ended up catching the sparring part – and the Frenchman. I was surprised to see that I survived as long as I did.

They both wrecked me. It was glorious.

Did manage to catch Chad in an omaplata (!!) in one of our rolls, which is the second time I’ve tapped him in 14 years. Pure luck.

So, I’m averaging one tap on him every seven years, which is actually far better than I woulda expected, lemme tell ya.

Unfortunately, the Frenchman, like me, had a number of injuries and he definitely tweaked it again rolling with Chad, who I’m sure, was happy to be on the mats with two high-level fellas like them.

Him: Rolling after 40 is a different thing.
Me: Preaching to the converted, man.

Afterward, the three of us left with the kid to head back to my place to drink and catch up.

Me: Heya! Are we still on for tonight?
Her: I mean, I’m still testing positive for covid…

The reason I had the kid with me was the same reason that we had to shut down the gym the other day; his sitter was supposed to watch him so I could hang out with them but she ended up getting COVID. Ditto for his guitar instructor.

But I was happy he got to meet Bryson. I consider him one of my oldest and dearest friends, even though we rarely see each other.

Kinda think that’s just how it is these days.

The kid’s been on a taco kick lately; this is what I made for him earlier in the week…

But there’s this killer taco truck one block away from my pad and we left the gym late. Like, really late.

Me: You guys should get something here. The food is outstanding.
Frenchman: You don’t want anything? It’s on me.
Me: Nah, I’m still single so I gotta try and look good. But I’m sure the kid’ll want something.
Boy: YESH!

It was great catching up with them. The kid liked having a full house. And the late-night Mexican.

Me: Why are you always hungry?!
Boy: YOU’RE ALWAYS HUNGRY.
Me: (scowling because I was just bested by a seven-year-old)

They gave me a ton of gossip about all the other schools and the goings-on there. We also talked a lot about child-rearing.

Me: As the only one of us without a daughter, I’m just gonna say I’m guessing that’s even more stressful.
Bryson: No way, boys are a terror. Terror!

It was pretty fun night that we said we’d do again.

The next day, I brought the kid out to my in-laws and then came back.

Also met up with another single-serving girlie, which is all that really needs to be said. Another date to nowhere.

It was a short little innocuous meetup.

Her: You’re a little too charming for my tastes. My spider-sense goes off when someone’s too charming.
Me: Give it time, darling. I’ll be sure to disappoint you, somehow.

Had a few more dates lined up this week too but an unexpected trip to the doctor for a medical emergency and a blue-eyed blonde firecracker messed up those plans.

But that’s for another entry.

Her: You’re the first guy I’ve ever googled and actually found something besides their LinkedIn.
Me: You’re welcome?

Location: this morning, getting an early morning Reuben with a new friend and not getting to eat it.
Mood: super tired
Music: never get old (Spotify)
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