Globetrotting Pt. I

Trip to Europe: New York to Paris, to Nates, to Bruges

Couldn’t even begin to tell you about the day I had. I’ll tell you in two weeks. Promise.

For now, my trip:

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Packed this morning but Jim forgot to confirm our ride. So I took the train to 34th and 7th Ave, where, like a $10 hooker, I stood on the corner to wait for a shiny silver car to pick me up.

For international flights you gotta be checked in at least an hour before the plane departs. We were scheduled for 5:55. We arrived at 4:53. After some well handled pleading, we got in. We went to the clubroom where I had a scotch (no good rum available).

We hopped on the plane and I listened to Good Souls as the plane leveled off.

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Arriving in Charles de Gaule, we took the train to Nates where a driver picked us up and took us to the Hotel Hermitage in La Boule, France. It was a beautiful yet vapid place – the food was surprisingly mediocre – the hamburger I had there was one of the worst I’ve ever had it cost $40.

Was certain it’d come with a massage at that price but I was wrong.

Walking on the beach, I took the picture of a happy couple above and thought, Someday…

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Cocktail parties, meet and greets, nothing of substance.

Jim and I went over to the local town where we had a plate of seafood. It was also ok; about 50% snails and not our cup of tea. I had five snails, Jim had four. Not terrible, not great.

Man, these French like to smoke. Meanwhile, the waitresses are smoking. Huh.

I wanted to tell her, “Use me, abuse me, make me write bad checks” but then I remembered I don’t speak French. So, instead we made the international symbol of check please by scribbling in the air.

Walking down the beach, I felt the cool wind in my hair.

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Grabbed a ride to Nates to catch a plane to the Netherlands. There we hopped on board a private jet where the stewardesses were all dressed in the sexiest damn outfits I’ve ever seen.

Some killer food on the plane – better than most of the meals I have at home (though that’s scant surprise).

We then took a bus to our ship as I heard a blue jean baby sing.

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On ship with a balcony and view. It’s where I took this video. Meetings, food, sun. Drank way too much. Got hit on by a bunch of gay guys. Great.

Not a single girl of my type in the group so I snuck out and chatted with the cute matre’d from one of the ship restaurants, Alexandra. I told her to ring me if she was ever in my town and she said she would.

I thought that I don’t wanna be walked on just before I fell asleep.

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Went to Bruges, Belgium from the Netherlands to have lunch at the Half Moon Brewery. It was interesting, the food and beer was topnotch BUT it totally wasn’t worth the three hours it took to get there and the three hours it took to get back.

The ship set sail for Rotterdam (above pic in the lobby of the New York Hotel there) and I heard someone say that everyone’s taken everything they can. I don’t think that’s true. I hope that’s not true.

More tomorrow.

Location: 3PM, staring at several Glocks in Queens
Mood: indescribable
Music: see the words in italics above

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