Tag: good things

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Two college lifetimes

For my boy, of course!

Mom: Was that today? I forgot.
Me: (gently) That’s ok. I forgot too until [my sister] reminded me. It’s good that we forgot today. It’s not like we’d forget him.
Her: Oh, I’d never forget him.
Me: I know, mom.

My dad died eight years ago this week.

I graduated college waaaaaaaay back in 1993. For a solid decade or two afterward, I told time in terms of “college lifetimes.”

Like, eight years woulda been two college lifetimes.

I remember when 1997 rolled around; I marveled that I’d spent four years in college and now, another four years had passed.

College seemed like it would go on forever.

And now, it’s been over for 32 years, which is such a kick in the head.

It doesn’t feel like my dad and Alison have been gone for two college lifetimes, and yet they have.

I suppose the only small solace in all this is both my mom and I forgot that my dad died this week, and that’s such a good thing.

Don’t wanna celebrate, or even memorialize his death, just his life, and how much it meant to me.

My dad drove an old beat-up blue Toyota.

The man coulda bought any car he wanted but that car never gave him a lick of trouble, and he loved it, so he drove it until it practically fell apart.

My siblings and I are pretty much the same way as him.

I used to take the train to Flushing and my dad would pick me up at 老地方, or “the regular spot,” for years in his blue whip.

There was one time, he picked me up with a mischievous grin on his face.

Him: You smell anything?
Me: (getting into the car) Yeah. What is that?
Him: Open the glove compartment.
Me: (opening it) OMG, you got a Fontana’s gyro for me!
Him: (nodding) With extra meat, just like you always ask for.

Swear to god, I had no idea that I’d replay that moment a thousand times in my head.

That was my dad. No one picks me up from the regular spot anymore.

I don’t have him or my regular spot anymore.

He woulda loved the kid so much too.

And he’d be so amused at how much he eats, like me.

Me: Oh man, thanks, dad. You’re the best!
Him: (waving his hand) For my boy? Of course! Just remember to treat your kids the same way.
Me: (laughing) Kids? Me? 

Location: Hoboken, for three minutes, before heading back
Mood: nostalgic
Music: I’ve lost count, all the detours that we take (Spotify)
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A short trip north

Cornell Chicken

Both the Firecracker’s kid and my kid are back for a little bit.

My kid came back first, so he and I had a little lunch together just so we could chat and catch up.

Me: So, how was it with your cousins?
Him: Good!
Me: (nodding) Anything else?

And then once the Firecracker’s kid came back, I took them both out to eat, since we’ve not really had a chance to hang out over the summer.

Me: So, how has your summer been, kiddo?
FCSon: Good!
Me: (nodding) These are good talks we’re all having.

An actual good I had recently was with my old buddy Buckley regarding the entry I wrote the other day, and he invited us to go see him.

Him: The weather is finally getting better. My offer to visit our hood remains open! From now through November will be prime weather.
Me: 100%! Hey, both boys are here this Sunday if you’re around? No pressure if you’re not but I wanted to ask.
Him: That could work!

So, that weekend, we took the train up to their neck of the state.

Buckley actually made Cornell Chicken, which is something I’ve always wanted to try.

Ironically, the day after, I came across this article from my old company that wrote about the history of it and why it’s so good.

Him: It was actually invented by the same food scientist that invent chicken nuggets.
Me: (laughing) Perfect because FCSon is like 79% chicken nuggets by volume.

While the adults were catching up, the kids were playing on a zipline that Buckley installed for his kids.

Me: Buckley is the only person I would trust to put up a zipline (he was an engineer in college).
Buckley’s Wife: Oh yeah, he did everything the right way.
Me: (nodding) Having lived with him alla these years, I believe that.

Told his kids that I’d known their father longer than I’d NOT known him, which is a kick in the head.

The zipline was a nice distraction from the screens…albeit short-lived.

We hung out a bit longer before we took the train home as the dark clouds were looming.

Her: Just think about it, Logan. If we lived in a house, the boys could have a zipline and you could have a grill.
Me: Compelling arguments. But let’s see after the boys head off to college.

Location: Please don’t tell…
Mood: fatty-fat-fat
Music: We’d play pretend in the suburbs (Spotify)
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Way less sad

Taking it every day I can

KG Betty: I just moved a few weeks ago; once I’m settled in it’ll all start sinking in. How about you? Still super happy? I hope everything is good with you!
Me: I wouldn’t say I’m super happy but you just reminded me of a song I’ve been listening to called “Way Less Sad.” It’s got a line goes, “I’m not happy yet, but I’m way less sad.”

Been chatting with KG Betty again.

She reached out to me a few times while Alison was sick but I couldn’t pull myself together enough to chat with her.

Or anyone, really.

Afterward, I was even more of a mess.

But, she always kept in touch, something I really appreciated. And she’s been dealing with her own stuff these days so I reached out to her.

Like I always said, old friends are such a valuable thing to have in your life.

I’m grateful for the ones that have stuck around.

Speaking of friends, my buddy Katrina was in my area the other day.

Her boyfriend was part of a bartending contest at our fave rum joint, Tiki Chick, to raise money for EPIC: Empowering Pacific Islander Communities.

Wanted to go – both to see them and because it’s my regular rum joint – but I was dealing with more tech issues, which I’ll tell you about one of these days.

Me: Sorry, was a crazy busy day with my network going down. Very annoying.
Her: That sucks. But it’s okay – you’re a busy guy

It’s a shame that I couldn’t make it but I figure they’ll do something like this again in the future and I can make it next time.

Until then, back to fixing this @#$@#$! network…

What I told KG Betty and my buddy Owen is true and I think that pretty much sums up my entire mindset these days.

I think that once someone deals with a double-whammy loss like I did, happy is something that seems very quaint and far away.

Way less sad is a win in my book and I’ll take it every day I can.

Obviously, the Firecracker has a lot to do with this, so I’m grateful for her as well.

Location: The New Cottage with my two tiny roommates
Mood: tech-y
Music: you’re so insane – shut up and just enjoy this feelin’ (Spotify)
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Love you, buddy

Another School Year

Firecracker: Love you, buddy.
Me: Did you just say, “Love you, buddy,” to me?
Her: (laughing) I was just talking to my son, but I do, anyway!

The Firecracker’s son has been away for a bit as well and he’s scheduled to come back this week – the Firecracker is just as excited to see him as I was to see my son last week.

But all this also means that school is starting soon and that means the kid is another year older.

Told you once, years ago, that my year always starts in September. That waned a bit but, now that I have my own kid, that feeling is exactly the same – and as strong as it ever was.

On that note, Angel and her son came by for dinner with us the other night.

Her: Thanks so much for inviting us.
Me: No problem. Plus, I get it – just spending a week in Vienna, I Was longing for a home-cooked meal. I can’t imagine traveling for months and eating out every night.

Forgot to take pics but we had a fun time eating and catching up.

Just a pic from Din Tai Fung.

Her son’s off to a boarding school in Europe and she’s moving to London to be (somewhat) near to him.

Should mention that it was her son’s choice to head to Europe; if my kid wanted to move abroad, I’m not sure I’d let him just because I think I’d miss him too much.

Then again, it’s not fair for me to have lived my life and also try to live his life.

As the kid gets older, suppose we’ll have more things to wrestle with.

Until then, I’m just glad he’s around and such a bright bit of my otherwise drab life.

Him: Can I eat in my room to watch something?
Me: You don’t wanna eat with me?
Him: I ate with you for brekkie!
Me: (sigh) Yeah, I guess so…

Location: home but dreaming of Belize
Mood: ambitious
Music: That’s just how I deal with crisis (Spotify)
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If you sit here long enough, everyone walks by

The Firecracker and the Asians

Alex: There’s a spot in the middle of Central Park, the Bethesda Fountain. If you sit there long enough, the entire city walks by.
Isabel: Hmm. And I know of this one canyon, that if you sit there long enough, nobody finds you and you die.

This pic is over 20 years old (I age very slowly); that’s Bethesda Fountain behind me. It’s from this entry.

Matthew Perry was in this rom-com that I absolutely loved when I was a kid called Fools Rush In, with Salma Hayek.

In it, their two characters were comparing the beauty of nature in Nevada, versus the excitement of New York.

I think a lot about maybe getting some place away from NYC, but I honestly can’t imagine living anywhere else but here.

Anywho, I gotta agree with the character of Alex – there’s something about NYC where the entire world really does seem to stop by for a visit.

In the past month alone, we had two doctors from Pittsburg, my relatives from Indiana, and friends from Spain stop by.

This past week, my friend Angel came to town with her son.

She wanted to go to Japanfes, which just happened to be in my neck of the woods this time around so off we met.

She brought her son, who was a Scenic Fights fan, which is always a plus.

Angel: He decided to study German. No idea why.
Me: Oh, I get it. If he can speak English, Chinese, and German, he’s speaking the languages of the Top 1, 2, and 3 world economies, in that order. He can literally work in 95% of the planet with those three languages.
Her: (smiling) Well, ok then!

The kid used the chance to get himself a bubble tea while the Firecracker got herself a salmon sushi taco.

Her: I think if I wrote an autobiography, I’d call this time “[The Firecracker] and the Asians.

Afterward, we went to my fave bistro around the way and got some more food and drink.

It was good seeing Angel – It’s been at least 20 years since I saw her last but she looked pretty much as I remembered her.

After a spell, we went back home, where we convinced Angel and her son to play Big Two.

The Firecracker is an addict.

But she came in second after Angel’s son.

She’s supposed to come back again before she leaves for dinner as she and her kid have been traveling the world and miss having a home cooked meal.

I’ll tell you about that next time.

Location: booking a hotel for a far-off place
Mood: content(ish)
Music: like a narc I knew I had to leave my mark (Spotify)
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Everything’s moving at lightning speed

Plus jewelry in Chinatown

Him: What was that?!
Me: What was what?
Him: You didn’t feel that?
Me: (puzzled) No. (later) Whoa, ok, I felt that! I think we just had an earthquake.

The kid was settling down for the night when the August 2nd, 2025 east coast earthquake hit.

Nothing really happened in the pad, although I did do a cursory inspection around the place.

It’s kinda crazy how much the world’s changing yet we’re all a bit inured to it all.

I had to run an errand in Chinatown for a relative and I also promised the kid we’d head down so he could have some pasteries, so the Firecracker, he, and I all headed down the other day.

While we were there, the Firecracker found some jewelry that she fell in love with, so I bought her a little something. I’ll tell you more about that someday.

As for the kid, well, he got what he really wanted all along.

The Firecracker ended up hanging out in Chinatown to do her own thing while the kid and headed back – but not before stopping by a soccer store so he could check it out.

He’s grown a solid inch since March, which is already something I’m already trying to wrap my head around, but more than that, he’s got a lotta opinions now.

And we’re doing things like checking out stores for stuff for him to buy.

When I was a kid, I remember my mom telling someone that we were growing up so fast whereas I remember everything being such a draaaaaaaggg…

Now I get it.

Everything’s moving at lightning speed, and I’m worried it’ll all be over before I realize it.

In my head, the kid looks like the 18-month-old above.

But he’s not anymore and I feel so many different things all at once about that.

Location: home, organizing a ton of boxes
Mood: nostalgic
Music: all over, I feel the earth move under my feet (Spotify)
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Tent or Cave?

Troglodyte

Me: I think all housing is either a tent or a cave. Like a modern home is a modern tent and a modern apartment is just a modern cave.
Firecracker: What would you call a stone house then?
Me: That’s still a cave. It’s like when you say all foods are soups or sandwiches, although I think that there’s a third category of salads.
Her: (shaking head) No those are soups. But I think there are a lot more things than tents and caves.
Me: Disagree on both points!

For years, I lived in my parents’ basement and then lived in my own basement for a while.

Told someone once that I was an actual troglodyte – which is someone that lives in a cave – in that an apartment is essentially a modern cave.

She disagreed as well.

But really, people have been living in caves since the dawn of time and things don’t really change, we just get used to things.

Like I live in a cave in the middle of Manhattan.

There are worse places to be.

The kid’s coming back this week and I’m super excited. There was a long time where I thought that home was wherever Alison was.

Suppose that’s a major reason I become unmoored after she died. I lost my sense of self.

But I’ve gotten better all these years because home is where the kid is now.

And the Firecracker and her son round out what home now means to me.

In fact, the Firecracker and I talk a lot about maybe getting a trailer and a car and traveling across the country when the kids go off to college.

Someday, maybe.

Until then, think I’ll make the kid some pancakes when he comes back for brekkie in our little cave we call home.

Me: You’re back in two days!
Him: I know! I can’t wait.
Me: Me neither, kiddo. Me neither.

Location: almost home
Mood: hot, hot, hot, hot
Music: don’t matter where we go, we always find our way back home (Spotify)
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Concert: Andy Grammer at Pier 17 2025.07.18

A Night at the Seaport

After Patrick Droney’s set, things were quiet for almost 45 minutes before Andy hit the stage.

But when he did, he did it with his typical high energy, which everyone in the crowd appreciated.

Here’s him singing a covers mashup before sliding into his own song, Fresh Eyes, a song that I’ll talk to you about one of these days.

Her: Man, he hasn’t been off pitch all night.
Me: I wouldn’t know but I’ll take your word for it.

The Firecracker knew pretty much every song by him and sang along the whole night.

It was great to see her so happy.

Me: Having a good night?
Her: I’ve got Andy Grammer, my guy, and a beautiful summer night. So, yeah.

The crowd was really into it as well. Like I said, the man gives a great concert – if you get a chance to catch him life, you totally should.

Here’s him playing a song I love called Monster, which I absolutely relate to.

Afterwards, the Firecracker and I took a little walk around the South Street Seaport.

Living in NYC my whole life means that I’ve seen a lotta changes – and man, has the Seaport changed a lot since I was kid.

But that’s a story for another time, I suppose.

Location: humid and wet NYC
Mood: sweaty
Music: You dress up just a little and I’m like, “Oh, damn” (Spotify)
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Concert: Patrick Droney at Pier 17 2025.07.18

A Surprise(ish) concert

Her: What?! Oh no!!
Me: What happened?
Her: I just got a text that our concert is tonight.
Me: What? No, it’s not. It’s in August.

Was making dinner on Friday when I heard the Firecracker yell out, so I quickly went into the room to see her on her phone, quite perplexed.

We’d bought tickets for an Andy Grammer – we’re both big fans – and Patrick Droney concert from someone that couldn’t make the show, and it turns out that they pushed up the date of the show over a month from the original date.

Evidently, they didn’t let us know.

So, we literally shoved alla the food I’d made into our faces and dashed off downtown.

Had to tell my kali class and the Radiologist – who was gonna stop by the class – that we couldn’t make it that night.

Me: OMG, we just got an email which is wild; a concert that we booked for August 23rd was resecheduled for tonight! This is the first we heard of it. Literally just got an email right this second.
Him: Enjoy the concert! I’d do Andy Grammar first second and third.

So, off we went.

We were there in less than 30 minutes – living in the middle of Manhattan does have its perks.

The weather and venue were absolutely perfect.

And we were right up near the stage.

So, we had amazing views and sounds.

Patrick Droney was the opening act, and I was actually a fan of his song, Stand and Deliver, which I didn’t get a chance to record.

But, as good as he was, we were there to see Andy and, man, did he deliver.

That fella throws a concert, lemme tell ya…

But I’ll write more about that in the next entry.

Until then, here he is performing one of my fave songs, Honey I’m Good, which is just so catchy.

More Andy in the next entry.

Dude rocks in concert. Literally.

Location: home
Mood: beat
Music: I’ll stand and deliver for you (Spotify)
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Cocktails at Omega

A Second Invitation

I’d taken over my old instructor’s class for a number of years when his work schedule changed but then everything went to hell with Alison, so he returned, and I went back to just being one of his students.

But I still have a handful of people that I tutor – I’m not their main instructor but I give them tips and tricks to improve their kali.

One such person is a Radiologist from Pittsburgh (which happens to be exactly where the Professor lives).

In any case, the Radiologist dropped me a line the other day.

Him: Hey! I remember us talking a while back about nice watches. My sister works for a luxury brand, and they are hosting some fun swanky event. Would you have any interest in taking your fiancée to something like that?
Me: 100%! Where and when?

So, before we knew it, we were downtown at Brookfield Place at the Omega Store there.

Turns out that the Radiologist got the time a bit off, so we walked around for 30 minutes beforehand, checking the place out.

And then, afterward, we went to the Omega store and met up with the Radiologist’s sister, who was just a sweetheart and got along with the Firecracker, swimmingly.

Her: Do you want to try on the pink one?
Firecracker: Sure, thanks!

She was also kind enough to have someone bring us some champagne…

Me: This reminds me of when we were in Pasadena.
Firecracker: Oh right, at Tiffany’s. We should check out wedding bands.

…as well as some hors d’oeuvres.

We spent most of the time chatting with his sister but also with the person in charge of alla the Omega stores in North America – turns out, he’s proficient in ranged weapons while I focus mainly on melee weapons.

Later on that week, the Radiologist was in town and we brought him to the same bistro I brought the professor for some drinks because he was fully scheduled.

Me: (to waitress) I bring all the Pittsburgh doctors I know here.
Her: (laughs) OK!

Afterwards, the Firecracker and I chatted.

Her: It’s nice that you always get invited to the rando things.
Me: Like I said, the whole point of being invited someplace is to get a second invitation.

Location: all over midtown with a hot blonde and a dog
Mood: less ache-y
Music: The city won’t change us, we beat to the same drum (Spotify)
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