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personal

Breathe, me, breathe…

How much is too much in a personal blog?

 

Can someone gimme my old life back?

Also, anything pre-2001 would be good too, and 1990 would rock so hard.

In any case, if you’re reading this, you probably either blog yourself or read blogs regularly.

Question: How much is too much in a personal blog?

OK, clearly this is too far but what about that grey area in-between? Note that, before you answer, I already know what is right for me – I’ve made my decisions.

I know my lines and I don’t cross them.

But I’m interested in your opinion, purely for my own curiosity.

For the skirts that read my blog, say you met me and I told you on the third date I had a blog, what would you think?

And what about the rest of you? Do I kiss and tell too much?

Not that I….ever…you know…actually get to…kiss anyone…

Location: yest – 9:00, arriving at the office; 21:00, leaving it
Mood: braindead
Music: Yeah I think that I might break I’ve lost myself again

Categories
personal

Anniversary / Year in Review

 

 

Him: You ok?
Me: Just thinking ’bout last summer.
Him: What about?
Me: (laughing) I feel free again.
Him: (disgusted) Don’t get all emo on me, dude.

It’s been exactly a year since I’ve started blogging. Had a different blog for a few weeks before I turned to this one.

Started it all because I was bleeding so much electronic ink anyway back then. Somehow, it’s morphed into what you see now.

Been in a good mood lately because I’ve had some time to reflect on the year. I wonder what my life would have been like if the ex and I stayed together – I think we’d have bits of happy with shades of miserable.

If we stayed together, though:

  • I never would have met Somena or L, (both of whom I met in bars – weird). I also wouldn’t be so chatty with KGBetty, Hazel or Nadi. With them plus new girls like Burn, I’ve got an awesome set of female friends.
  • I probably wouldn’t see the Zu Boys, Giovanni, Bryson, Hipstomp, Captredstar, Sheridan, Paul or any of the other guys nearly as much.
  • I wouldn’t have dated all the people I’ve dated – dunno if that’s good or bad. I’d probably have more scratch but less interesting stories.
  • I would never have dated the girl with blue jean eyes, which, for all it’s ridiculous drama, I still think of fondly. I should tell you that after we broke up, I got hooked on mac’n cheese cause of her.
  • I wouldn’t have gotten into photography.
  • There’d be no 72nd to Canal.
  • I wouldn’t know the joy that is aged dark rum on the rocks with a slice of orange.
  • I would have died having only kissed 10 women in my life – huh…
  • Probably still be driving my ride.
  • Harold’d still be a salad buffet.

Mostly though, I wouldn’t have this blog. You wouldn’t be reading me; I wouldn’t be writing this.

There’d be no you and me.

Funny thing is: I intended to only write this for a year, at most. Figured I’d run outta things to say to the three people that read me if I posted, say, every two days or so.

Now, I look forward to these daily conversations with you. Like I said, 8.2 million people but few connections.

Check it out: just for now, we’ve traveled through time (I wrote this before you read it) and space (I’m here, you’re there) and we’re connected. Writing is more than just words strung together – writing is telepathy.

You may think I’m vain, a womanizer, a hypocrite, awesome, humble, self-involved, brilliant, stupid, what-have-you,

But I’ve tricked you, you see; It’s quiet now, And I made you think of me.

The very last thing said at the end of this 80s flick called Heaven Help Us is by Ed Rooney. After everything, he’s a shampoo boy at a Bensonhurst hair salon, where the hours suck, the pay sucks, and I’m surrounded by ‘funny guys’, but the tips are great! Thank you, God!

It’s sucked a lot from there to here but I don’t think it could have played out any differently, or better, really.

One last movie quote. In You’ve Got Mail, Kathleen writes to Joe:

The odd thing about this form of communication is that you’re more likely to talk about nothing than something. But I just want to say that all this nothing has meant more to me than so many somethings.

I’m not on the other side yet, but I think I’m on my way.

Without getting too emo, thank you, very much, for reading me.

I’ll keep writing…

Thank you, God.
Location: here, telling you something important to me
Mood: grateful
Music: I’ll be back in the high life again
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Categories
personal

Pets, Pt. II

Being friends with an ex comes with its own special baggage

Think I’m pretty much just feeding the mice at this point. They even keep eating all the poison bait I put out, with no effect.

Mouse1: Look, I like that he leaves us food on these shiny wood and metal plates. But, #$@#! That green stuff gave me a @#$@#! stomachache.
Mouse2: Why do you have to curse so much?
Mouse1: I’ve become inured to it as the expressive vocabulary of my society. It’s neither indicative of a belief nor of a value system.
Mouse2: (…)
Mouse1: (sighing, shaking head) I know, we totally gotta get outta this #$@#$@ joint.

May take one of No. 6’s cats. Besides the mouse issue, I miss having a pet that doesn’t swim in its own waste.

Unfortunately, my last conversation with her was decidedly unpleasant. While I like the thought of having a cat that I’m used to, I’m worried it’s gonna come with baggage.

No more baggage for this bright-eyed, bushy-tailed, Asian boy, thanx.

Plus, I’ve never had a little kitten before; that might be kinda cool.

But we’ll see.

Wonder how Harold’s gonna take it.

Location: PM yest., 26th Precinct, writing a check
Mood: still sick
Music: After all the b__s__ I’ve heard It’s refreshing
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personal

New York in the Indigo

When Harry Met Sally is just a film, it’s not the real world

I’ve been sitting here working all damn day. At least it’s the weekend. Hazel took this picture a couple of weekends back at the 7/7/07 rooftop party. Time’s just sprinting by.

People email me asking why Hazel, Somena, or any of my other female friends and I don’t just get together.

It’s because When Harry Met Sally isn’t the real world or the NY I know. In my NY, guys can have three types of female friends: former somethings, just friends, and potential somethings.

In my life at least, we all know the parts we play.

A guy like me won’t end up with a chick just cause she’s around. And vice versa.

Who wants that? That’s like when you eat the crap in the fridge because you’re too lazy to go out so you think, Eh, it looks ok.

I’ve had crazy love before. Once you’ve had that, everything else is a distant second. If you’ve ever been loved, you know. You won’t take less.

Dean Martin knew that you can never really go home to Steubenville after you’ve seen the lights of New York.

I’m alone, yeah.

But I’m not lonely.

OK, back to work…

Location: my black chair, all %#@! day
Mood: beat tired
Music: It ain’t no big thing But I know what I like
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Categories
personal

Logan hates mice and AT&T

Also, here’s a vid of Pixar’s Lifted

 

Right now, I have two major distractions from my daily ruminations on insomnia, girlies, scratch, and the accident:

  1. I hate Cingular / AT&T; with a passion. Pure…white…hot…hatred.
  2. I have a mouse, in my house.

Regarding point one, and without getting into details, I’ve demanded that they write in bold letters in my account notes: We have screwed this man blue (they actually wrote, Client is justifiably upset with our level of service).

Could hate them more – I just don’t see how.

Regarding point two, my kitchen is like the DMZ. I’ve got baits, traps, poisons, and at least one Rube Goldberg/Tom & Jerry contraption – all of which, I think are just amusing them.

Mouse1: What’s that?
Mouse2: He put out peanut butter.
Mouse1: SWEET!
Mouse2: No, it’s that healthful crap. The kind where the oil and stuff separate…
Mouse1: What the @#$! is wrong with that guy? He needs to get some sleep.

Swear those little bastards are drinking my rum too.

Location: 7PM, yesterday, The PIT
Mood: busy
Music: Get on the highway point yourself my way

Categories
personal

On your side

I’m (not so) secretly on your side

I know we never talk;
Or take walks,
or even write.

It’s strange – we’re strangers.

We live separate lives.
But secretly

(shhhhh)
secretly, I’m on your side.

Location: -1 hr, all over the UWS
Mood: busy but happy
Music: I know we’ve all had a bumpy ride

Categories
personal

Can I borrow a quarter?

The Pickup Line Generator

I’ve been busier than I’ve been in ages. I can’t explain it.

If I knew I’d be working so much, I would have just gotten a job.

GEEK ALERT: On a different matter entirely, and related to my last post, I was thinking of getting a PDA phone and was looking up software options when I came across the Pickup Line Generator 1. Just imagine:

Me: Hi…um, hold on a sec (fumbles with phone).
Her: Um…
Me: Hold on, hold on…um…no that’s no good…not a redhead…haha, funny but…no. Oh wait. This is good. “Can I borrow…?”
Her: (interrupting) Um…I’m gay. And a pescatarian.
Me: Of course you are.

Somewhere, someone is paying $37 to embarrass him/herself completely.

Sucker.

I do it all the time without paying a cent.

Location: Broadway, putting another pretty lady into a cab
Mood: pensive
Music: You’re the best listener that I’ve ever met
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Categories
personal

It doesn’t matter

If you don’t know where you want to go, it doesn’t matter what road you take

Traffic sign in Flushing Queens, NY.

One day Alice came to a fork in the road and saw a Cheshire cat in a tree.
“Which road do I take?” she asked.
“Where do you want to go?” was his response.
“I don’t know,” Alice answered.
“Then,” said the cat, “it doesn’t matter.”

Had quite the weekend because of the show but that’s tomorrow’s entry.

So I considered locking this blog and or not writing anymore, but then again, rum and women notwithstanding, I live a fairly boring life.

I’m surprised you’re still here.

Decided to continue writing as usual. Pretty much made all my choices and so much of my life is out there already. It’s like putting toothpaste back into a tube. Anyway, writing is for public consumption. Anything else, and you’re just a nutcase with a notebook. Here’re my thoughts:

  • Regarding potential women, we both know that my love life’s a train wreck all on its own, with or without this blog.
  • Regarding past women, there’s a reason they and I live separate lives. After some thinking, I’m assuming that since they want no part of my life, why would they read about it?*
  • Regarding employment, I’ve essentially not had a real job since 1999. Why start now?

While I’m writing about the show tomorrow, I gotta mention that Furison came and said that I was absurdly hot. This brings the total number of times, I’ve been called that to…1. She said other nice things about 72nd to Canal but, let’s be honest, I only saw absurdly hot and eye-candy mainstay.

Her comments on my pictures do shed light to this blog entry; oh well, it’s still not a bad way to start the week.

Not a bad way at all.

*Coincidentally, I just had a woman from my past visit me – I guess I’ll have write about that later too.

Location: 7:30PM Yest, standing in church by myself
Mood: surprised
Music: the finish line’s a good place we could start

Categories
business personal

(Not) Back in the picture

Some breakups take longer than others

Blue Jean Eyes and I were orbiting for a bit more but I didn’t mention it because I wasn’t sure how it’d shake out. Turns out I was right; fifteen days later, we’re total strangers.

Suppose that’s just how it goes.

———-

There’s a new book called Send which basically says, think twice before you do anything online as once it’s up, it’s there forever. This is turning out to be very disturbingly true:

I did work for a short film, Cycle, years ago. Apparently it’s being shown someplace because I got a email from a girl asking me if I was the same Logan Lo.

Someone else said that she read about me from a random article in a local paper.

Just Googled my name and this blog showed up.

Getting a sinking feeling that if I ever look for a job (or a chick), I’m screwed.

I should re-think this blog, maybe…

Location: @3PM yest., Walker & 6th Ave
Mood: uncomfortable
Music: angel in disguise Chinese-speaking girlfriend big brown eyes

Categories
personal

Virginia, look at the blue sky

Dr. Kelso: Are you an idiot?
JD: No sir, I’m a dreamer.

Scrubs, S06E16 : 02:53

 

Location: @7:30 AM, Central Park in spring
Mood: thoughtful
Music: You’re good at makin’ me feel so small And I know you