Tag: dating

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personal

Therapy with Rain

I wait for the things worth waiting for

He’s been busy and so have I; plus we don’t have the requisite scratch for another ep of 72nd to Canal (if you happen to have 22 grand lying around, shoot me an email). We haven’t seen each other in a bit – life just gets in the way.

But his girl checked in with me today (she’s a sweetheart) and I recalled one of my more interesting conversations with him.

Him: Six months?
Me: Well…yeah, pretty much…
Him: Wow. I think I’d explode.
Me: Dude, it’s not that bad. I think I could make a year.
Him: That’s in-sane! One year?!?
Me: Oh yeah, I’m like a camel. I wanna wait until I find someone I really like.
Him: You’re not getting any younger, man. And no one lies on their deathbed thinking, Oh, I’m glad I didn’t hit that when I was 34.
Me: (shrugging) I’m ok. Plus, have you seen me lately?
Him: (scoffing) I’m looking right at ya – you should take what your goblin ass can get.

Location: 10PM yest, Broadway & 82nd, wondering
Mood: hard to say
Music: we notice you don’t come around
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personal

Why?

People are looking for relationships for different reasons. Here’s mine

People ask me all the time why I’m looking.

The pathetically honest answer is that when I’m with someone, I sleep just a little bit better. Maybe ten percent. It’s enough. I do it so I can sleep ten percent better. Crazy.

It’s not about sex. It’s about something else – and that’s a different post; but if you’ve read me enough, I’m sure you could guess.

You remember the last time you didn’t get a good night’s sleep? You look at your clock and do that mental math – if I fall asleep right now, I can get four hours sleep? Three hours. Two. Forty minutes. You remember how horrible you felt the next day?

Yeah, that’s me every two weeks for 20 years.

I’ve avoided talking about insomnia for almost two months but here we are.

Another date today. Another pretty face. Biker. It usually takes about three dates for either the girl or me to call it quits. Goes either way.

Hazel thinks I’m luckier than most cause I meet so many people but I tell her that it just means I’m disappointed and I disappoint more frequently. I know it’s crazy. I know it.

And yet I sit. I smile. I ask, So, what’s your story?

Inside I hope, this time’s the last time.

Location: 2PM yest, in front of the Flatiron saying, Bye
Mood: awake
Music: Tell me, where is the shepherd
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personal

What has Life told you?

Got a call from a girl who asked me an interesting question

 

Me: I dunno, I’ve been out a lot this week, I shouldn’t.
Nadi: Blue-eyed Lawyergirl is gonna be there. Although you are NOT permitted to make a pass at her.
Me: First of all, I’ve got my hands full. Then again, why not? That’s half the fun right there – for all involved parties.
Nadi: It’s open ba…
Me: I’m in.

Was thinking of a girl with curls when my email box went ding.

Berlingirl wrote me and asked the most random but sweet thing: Hope you had a lovely day today! What has Life told you?

Thought that was such an interesting question.

So I stayed in tonight to listen. Life didn’t say anything to me though.

I’ll sit by the phone and wait anyway. Just in case.

Don’t wanna miss that call.

Location: living room, black chair
Mood: waiting
Music: where ever you go I always know
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business personal

Pets, Pt. III

 

Caffeineguy’s entry will explain. I miss my pets.

———-

Client: I need you in Syracuse next week. (pause) Think of it as a roadtrip.
Me: (scoffing) Sheeyah…

———-

Conversations with a friend:

Him: So basically, we’d be renting out small dogs for guys that wanna meet chicks.
Me: Well, what’s gonna happen when the betty actually shows up at the guy’s house and there’s no dog?
Him: That’s the brilliant part, he can just go, “Oh, Spike got hit by a car.” Then he also gets the sympathy vote too.
Me: Well, that’s just insane.
Him: Plus imagine we get a dog with only three legs. (pause) That’d be like…like gold!
Me: You’re going to hell.

Me? I’m going to Syracuse…

Location: 8PM yest, 6th and 3rd with Nadi & some rum
Mood: amused
Music: I’d rather be with…I’d rather be with an animal
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personal

Das ist fuer dich

Went on a date with the Berlingirl

 

I saw Berlingirl again the other day:

Her: I like your happy words, like lovely and wonderful. I also like hilarious, what a great word! And actually – actually is actually so useful!
Me: (nodding) It is.
Her: I brought you something. (hands me a gift)
Me: Lemme guess, it’s a baseball.
Her: Funny…No, but it does come with a catch – is that how you say it? You have to drink it with me here before I go or with me in Germany someday. (pause) Unless you drink it with the woman you love.
Me: (laughing) Fair enough.

Life is long and the world is small. I’m sure I’ll see her again.

 

Almost a year ago, I wrote this. After I walked the girl to where she was staying, I ducked into the 24 grocery on Broadway. That same manager saw me and gave me a big smile.

Him: How’s everything my young friend?
Me: It’s a beautiful night – I’ve no worries, no troubles.
Him: (nodding) That is a beautiful night.

Location: 12AM, 86th and Broadway
Mood: content
Music: she knows I know what she’s thinking
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personal

No Such Thing 2: Soulmate / One-itus

 There’s no such thing as a soulmate

 

My buddy Rain once wrote something brilliant maybe a decade ago called My Soulmate Sells Kumquats in Istanbul, or something. Basically, it was about the ridiculousness of the concept of a soulmate.

Fun with math:

  • There are 8.2 million people here in NYC.
  • With some 65% women, that means 5.33 million women.
  • Assume arguendo that 1% of 1% are perfect for me – the right age, look, brains, education, dietary restrictions, whatnot.
  • Ergo, there are 533 women in NYC perfect for me. Perfect. I just gotta find em.

So to add to my idea that there’s no such thing as a pickup line, there’s no such thing as The One. That and St. Valentine’s Day, was invented to sell you something – whether it be $4.50 for a piece of paper or the thought that, this person is the best I can do.

Trust me, the person you pine after ain’t that grand.

The only thing that changes in your relationship life is the degree of (a) effort and (b) forgiveness two people expend. That’s it. It’s true of any relationship – lovers, friends, family.

One-itus. It’s a crock. And don’t tell me I’m not a romantic – if you’ve read me at all you know I am.

It’s lot more romantic, IMHO, that two people work on making something…work, than two people being together because they both happen like the same obscure 80s band.

The one means, you’re the one I found cause I’m too lazy or scared to go up to a stranger and ask, what’s your story morning glory?

Location: 2PM yest, 53rd and 6th Ave., eying the Halal food
Mood: enthralled
Music: I was off kilter, now I got shelter

Categories
personal

September

My year really starts in September

Busy week. My rule to never say no to an invite came back to bite me last week. I was out every night after returning from Baltimore. Both my liver and my wallet hate me.

Saw a curly-haired girl from NYC, a grey-eyed blond from down south, and a brunette actress from Berlin, whom I suppose should be called Berlingirl.

For the first time in months, I find myself thinking about one particular girl. I’m trying not to dwell on it her too much, but it’s not easy.

Still, Fall’s my favorite season and I was alone(ish) last time around. Some company this year would be nice.

Not absolutely necessary but nice.

Hey, when does your year start? Does it start in January like most people? Or on your birthday?

Or September? Mine starts in September. Probably cause I was a student for so long.

And when you’re a fat, clumsy, geek, no one calls you to come out to play over summers. Plus camp’s for people with spare scratch.

For kids like me, summer’s just three months of solitude.

I can’t hardly wait for Fall to come.

Seriously, bring it, bring it, bring it…

Location: 10PM yest, saying goodbye and then hello on Broadway
Mood: excited again
Music: One eye on the winter Oh there’s just a hint of soviet snow

Categories
dating personal

Never gonna fall for

Saw a concert with Camera Obscura and The Last Town Chorus

 

The Last Town Chorus playing Modern Love at the South Street Seaport

Hopping on a 6AM train bound for Baltimore tomorrow. Exam.

Not ready but when are we ever for these tests we take in life?

Did go to that concert Friday at the seaport to see Camera Obscura. Opening act was The Last Town Chorus – that’s a pic of the lead singer, sorry so blurry, I was hella far away. They sang a cover of Bowie’s Modern Love.

Camera Obscura at the South Street Seaport

Told the Grey-Eyed Girl I went with that I got dropped off by my party bus rental at the seaport and spent my prom night there. She got a kick outta that. Been in this @#$! town too long.

Speaking of towns, looks like she and I are heading for Friendsville – weird, it’s usually me driving there. Well, it happens.

Been on 20 dates with 14 girlies in 60 days. Plus I met two separate women on the way to the concert. Not sure I’m cut out for this modern love – I’ve essentially turbo-charged my disappointments and disappointing. Perhaps I’m just all charm and no substance.

Startin’ to think dating’s just an excuse for me to blow coin I ain’t got, time I don’t have and hope I can’t spare.

Actually, hope? That I got.

Cause I keep thinking, this time’ll be different.

This time…

Location: on the telephone, dealing
Mood: indescribable
Music: Its just the power to charm
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personal

Great Expectations

Everyone I ever liked was some form of Estella

Dickens actually wrote two endings for the book – in the published version, you don’t know what happens to the two of them.

In the original, Dickens had Pip realize that he loved the girl that was cruel. And that girl was gone. The good girl left behind, wasn’t the one he loved.

I can relate. Think all the women I’ve ever had a thing for was some version of Estella. Interesting, eh?

I would love to meet a girl with that name. There was this Korean girl Stella whom I had a crush on. When we got our yearbooks, she wrote, You should have asked me out, I woulda said yes.

Argh! It’s why I don’t tell people things like that.

Other names I like:

  • Alexis – damn, that’s sexy
  • Amanda – just dated one
  • Marie – just met one from France, seeing her soon
  • Melissa/Melody/Molly – no explanation
  • Yve/Yvonne – massive elementary school crush
  • Many French/German/Russian names – Tajania, Katja
  • Many Japanese names – Naomi, Marimo

Once dated a girl who was Frau Zuzanne D’Longe – that was just hot.

Just walked in from a date.

Keep wondering if it’s better to have expectations or to have none.

Location: -30 mins telling her, I’m going in again
Mood: sotted
Music: I’d just like to know do you love him or just making time

Categories
personal

Umbrellas in our drinks

 The night is young and we have umbrellas in our drinks

 

Spoke to an ex a few times in this month. Probably not a good idea.

Speaking of exes, I met a designer who asked me what happened with my last serious girl. I don’t know why I told her because I don’t think I told anyone really, including you, did I? No great drama, really. Quite the opposite, in fact.

Me: One random day, I picked up tickets to a show and got reservations at her favorite Japanese restaurant as a surprise. She said she couldn’t make it that night because she was tired. So I tried to get her come out without ruining it and she hung up on me.
Her: That’s it? That’s crazy! You never told her?
Me: (shrugging) I tried but it’s hard talking to a dial tone.
Her: What? You couldn’t leave a message?
Me: I could have. But I felt that she should have been on my side, yeah?
Her: That’s your pride talking. I dunno who’s more f____ up, you or her.
Me: I’d put money on me. (laughing) But hey, we’re in New York, the night is young and we have umbrellas in our drinks. Does anything else really matter right now?
Her: (shakes head, grins)

It’s been a while since I’ve thought of either ex.

Dunno if it’s church, chicks, the checks or the rum, but I’ve been oddly content.

That’s not true – I know why. I’ll tell you soon.

Promise.

Location: 5:45PM yest, alone in a church
Mood: excited
Music: Sunlight On my face I wake up and yeah I’m alive
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