You’re not gonna believe this

Had another accident

It’s been a pretty insane week – which is saying a lot considering everything that’s happened the past two years.

Immediately after my last post, I had a week of insomnia. Serious insomnia.

My demons seem to like to stop by after midnight and stay for a spell.

After about four days I took some serious sleep meds and woke up in daze at 3AM on my floor.

And a lotta blood. A whole mask of blood, in fact, courtesy of a two-inch gash on my eyebrow and blood all over my face. No idea what I hit but I probably tripped on a chair.

Got to my feet and staggered to the bathroom where I took a tube of crazy glue and roughly sealed the cut. Then I called up Gymgirl.

Me: Sorry to wake you. I had something happen and I need you to do two things: (a) Call me in three hours and make sure I wake up? And (b) do me a solid and come by tomorrow to watch the kid?
Gymgirl: What? Why?
Me: It’s a long story. But I need your help. Can do those two things for me?
Her: I’ll call you in three hours and see you as soon as I can.

She called me and I woke up.

The crazy glue kept the wound closed and I managed to drop the kid off at his daycare. Gymgirl would watch after him after his sitter.

Because I had to go to the ER and I had enough goddamn experience to know it’d take all day.

Surprisingly, the local medimerge said that they had a plastic surgeon that could patch me up. In six hours. Downtown. So I made it back home, crawled into bed and slept until it was time to make it downtown, which I somehow did.

Doctor: That’s quite a cut
Me: I always go for the superlative.

Took 13 stitches to patch me up. Had rough flashbacks the whole time.

Took a cab home cause I was so out of it that I was sure I’d end up in the train tracks otherwise.

Me: How’s the kid?
Gymgirl: He’s good. How are you? (looks at me) You look OK. You look like you’re wearing makeup.
Me: That’s the look I’m going for.

My demons come at me after midnight. Wish they wouldn’t.

Then again, I wish for a lotta things.


Location: home, sick and in pain, again
Mood: just @#$@#$@# peachy, again
Music: my life has been a silent fight to be ok

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Blogarama - Observations Blogs


Go, no go?

January 2nd must be the busiest days for gyms and dating sites

Just came back from the doc’s. Was hoping he’d greenlight me to go back to the gym but no go: he said I’d have to wait until the end of February.

Gotta think of some way to do it, though. Not sure how as he was adamant that I’d get re-injured again because my leg is so weak.

I’ll think of something.

Noticed two things recently:

  1. On January 2nd, had the most readers I’ve had since I left LJ. I checked it out and this entry – Online dating: eHarmony vs. Match vs. Plenty of Fish vs. OK Cupid – had four times the normal readers. As an aside, it’s actually the first natural search result if you type in: “eharmony vs match.”
  2. My fencing class is packed.

Here’s what I think is going on: People are making New Year’s resolutions. I think that’s great.

Just hope that people stick with the things they’ve decided to do. There’s a saying that goes, You’ll regret the things that you’ve not done, more than the things you’ve done.

It’s somewhat tied in with what I wrote above.

Regret that I’ll lose six months to be better at something I enjoy. Can’t tell you how many people I’ve met in life that tell me: “If only I stuck with wrasslin/writing/boxing – I’d have X years of experience by now.”

Think that all the time myself.

Speaking of writing, dropped the price of my ebook down to $0.99 again because I wanted to do some marketing stuff with it but I’ve been too busy to do it and I’ve let it languish for a bit.

Dunno if you’ve noticed but I almost never curse in this blog (or real life) for that matter.

But I’ve been told by a few people that they’ve had a hard time reading my book because it’s so profanity-laden.

Find that more amusing than I should.

Pick it up if you’re interested in a fast read about New York City’s Chinatown in the 90s. (/shameless plug)

The Men Made of Stone - Logan Lo
Mood: shameless
Music: how I struggled in vain, to solve this riddle with my brain
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It’s hard to get around (things)

Navigating NYC – or just life, for that matter – isn’t easy

Reflecting pool at the east most part of East 72nd Street.Mass transportation in Manhattan is such that to go from West 79th street to East 79th Street involves taking a train down the west side to 42nd street, taking another train across the island, and taking yet another train up the east side to East 79th Street.

Think of a letter “U” and you get the idea.

Instead, took the bus across town cause I didn’t think my leg would be able to handle the trip up and down the stairs on the subway. It’s roughly the same amount of time but a straight shot – most people don’t take the bus for some reason. Which is why I try to.

I’ve noticed that it’s always some little old lady that’ll offer me her seat when she sees me struggling to board with my cane. It’s never the younger guy.

Suppose that they know how hard it is to get around, the older people.

Changing room while at MRI.Made an appointment to see get an MRI done. When I got there, the place was empty. Suppose that people have better things to do on sunny afternoon than be shoved some contraption.

Not me, of course – other people.

Was told to lie still for 25 minutes as this machine scanned me

Him: Stop moving around so much!
Me: Sorry, sorry…

As I hobbled home got a text from Paul. I’m free for a drink or something later if you’re not busy. I’ll bring the rums.

The remainder of the evening involved a good deal of self-medication.

Ended the night with a conversation with another friend over his relationship.

Said it once before: Goodbyes are sad, regardless of how it happens.

Me: You’ve been through this before and made it through ok. So has she, yeah? This’ll happen however it happens.
Him: I know…

Suppose we all know how hard it is to get around.

Location: a chair
Mood: thoughtful
Music: remind myself that times could be much worse
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If I were a betting man?

You get bonuses to go with every painful thing that happens to you

Saint Clair Cemin's 40 foot stainless steel sculpture at 57th Street and Broadway.After some more serious pain in my left leg and the acceptance of the fact that it wasn’t actually getting better, went to the doctor.

Didn’t actually have to wait all that long before this young doctor came in and examined me.

He pulled and pushed my leg in all sorts of different ways that were pretty violent but, oddly, didn’t hurt that much. Then he sent me in for an X-Ray and then finally wrapped up everything by saying that I had to get an MRI to rule out any damage to meniscus.

But there was a pause in his voice that worried me. Been to enough hospitals to recognize it.

Doctor: …just bring this to the front desk and they’ll order up the MRI for you.
Me: Will I need surgery?
Doctor: Well, it’s hard to say without an MRI and…
Me: (interrupting) What if you were a betting man, Doc? What would you say my chances were that I needed surgery then?
Doctor: (slight laugh) If I were a betting man? (turning somber) If I were a betting man, I’d say 90%. There’s definitely some damage there.

Took a deep breath and then went out to the front desk and then made it home.

The thing with bad events is that, not only do you get the bad event, you get bonuses.

The bad event here is that I got injured and now have to get surgery.

The bonuses here are that now I’m unable to work out, which means I’m unable to sleep. So in addition to the discomfort in my leg, there’s the return of the insomnia. Last night was the first night.

It’s only 8:41 AM and I’m already dreading tonight.

Also had to turn down some work in Brooklyn as I can’t make it out that far.

Finally, I’ve recently been dealing with a crisis of faith for unrelated reasons.

Not been the best week so far.

Well, there’s always tomorrow.

Location: a chair
Mood: concerned
Music: if we are wise We know that there’s always tomorrow
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Fear is forward. No one is afraid of yesterday

Logan Lo at the hospital - again
Her: Thanks for staying.
Me: (laughing) Where else was I going to go?


Not sure one could say I’ve bad luck – got a roof over my head, running water and all my family and body parts. Can’t really say I’ve good luck either.

Suppose you might call what I’ve got peculiar luck.

The kind where you spend a dollar to win a dollar.

Bout two weeks ago, found out that there was about a week’s gap between my old heath insurance and my new one. Joked to my boss that I’d try to stay outta the emergency room.

Next morning, bright and early, hear a slam and “Oh no.” Turns out HG smashed her fingers in the metal door. Blood everywhere. Everywhere. Next thing you know, in the emergency room. For hours.

Been to the emergency room four times in the past five years. But was fine each time.

Kinda the story of my life, yeah?

This chick named Renata Adler said that, Fear is forward. No one is afraid of yesterday.

Try to tell myself to hold on until storms pass, wait for the joy. In the meanwhile, insurance’s back.

Off to fencing. People swinging sharp metal objects around.

What could go wrong?


Met up with the fellas last night for beer and $0.10 wings. 60 wings for $6. Gotta love NYC.

On the way back, helped this pretty German tourist get to Columbus Circle.

NYC’s quite the town.

Location: not the hospital
Mood: still fulla wings
Music: Schön ist es auf der Welt zu sein


Red Blood, Green Beer, Red Envelopes

A green Cipriani sign


Her: (annoyed) Please, you’ve kissed half of New York.
Me: The female half!
Her: (glares)
Me: (thinking) That probably wasn’t the right thing to say.

A fella I know opines that only the Irish should wear green on St. Patty’s day or wish another person a Happy St. Patty’s day. That’s just ridiculous.

That’s like saying no one should wish me a Happy Birthday on my birthday cause it’s my birthday not theirs.

Y’don’t say Happy _____ to make yourself feel good, y’say it for the listener.

Like if y’wish me a Happy Chinese New Year, I’d take it, regardlessa your race, creed or colour. Likewise, if I wish you a Happy Chinese New Year and you’re not Chinese, I’m ok with that and hope y’d be too.

Plus there’s green beer for one and red envelopes for the other. Both good things.

Next Chinese New Year, drinking green beer.

Or green rum. Or just regular rum.

Probably just regular rum.

Delicious rum.


Y’ever watch CSI or Dexter where they shine that light all over the place to show if there’s blood splatter to indicate a crime occurred?

My pad’d glow like a teenage rave party. There was:

  • the time I sliced open my foot two hours before a vacation on a piece of glass (emergency room).
  • the time I fell down my stairs and smashed my face in, almost bleeding out (emergency room).
  • the time I sliced my hand in the kitchen (emergency room).
  • the time(s) I performed surgery on myself in the bathroom. (almost emergency room).
  • the time I killed the mouse in my other bathroom.
  • all of times I get knocked around wrestling or fencing.
  • today.

Should never live without a roommate.

On another point entirely, my insurance rate just went up. They must be reading this blog. I better buy an inexpensive burial insurance before it’s too expensive for me to even afford my own death.

Well, at least someone’s reading.

Location: yest, 7PM, looking for gauze on Broadway
Mood: bleeding
Music: you cut me open and I keep bleeding



Location: 23:00 yest, an orange chair
Mood: tired
Music: I don’t have a simple answer

Have y’noticed the disturbing trend in commercials and movies where people’re in a car and then another car comes outta nowhere and just smashes them up? I can relate.

S’for the shock value, yeah. But it does illustrate a point: y’never can tell what’s gonna happen, good or bad.

Finally got some significant scratch from a gig I did ages ago. Cannot tell you how excited I was about that.

But then another, unpleasant, thing popped up unexpectedly from a different area of my life. And I’m back to square one.

Juggling your health, wealth and relationships‘s never easy.

Sorry this post’s late, been busy. Juggling, y’see…

YASYCTAI: Get a prioritization system. (45 mins/1 pt)


Oatmeal or gruel? Vicodin or Rum?

A root canal is nowhere near as fun as you might imagine

A tribeca apartment stoop

Her: Let’s get going to see the dentist.
Me: OK, just lemme grab my keys. (sound of cloth ripping) Um, I think I just ripped my pants.
Her: (shakes head) I’m going to wait upstairs.

Had my second root canal today. If you’re contemplating getting one, reconsider. They are not nearly as fun as you might imagine. Visit three of nine.

Know what you never wanna hear your dentist say? Well, that’s unusual. That’s what y’never wanna hear your dentist say.

Assistant: Do you want more Novocaine?
Me: (muffled) God yes.

Actually been sleeping better, what with the quantity of drugs in my system. I also bought myself a mouth guard for teeth grinding at night, so that must be helping too.  But when I’m not sleeping, I’m reading Outliers. Probably his best book – and I liked the other two. Y’should read it. We’ll discuss when I’m not so cloudy.

Saw my mom for dinner.

Her: You’re coming home for dinner? (thinking) I’ll make oatmeal then.

Instead, had rice gruel and 10,000 year old egg. So. Painful. Least it wasn’t oatmeal. To add insult to injury, evidently washing down vicodin with rum is strongly discouraged. Which means I gotta choose which pain reliever I love more.

Me: …sorta felt like a hammer slamming into my tooth…
Brother: (interrupting) Y’know, using the words hammer and tooth in the same sentence results in, one would say, dubious enjoyment potential.

On the plus side, I’m gonna see me some Fleetwood Mac tonight. But first I gotta prep breakfast.

Two guesses what I’m having.

Location: 15:07 yest, getting drilled in Queens
Mood: more ouch
Music: sings a song Sounds like she’s singing oooh baby
YASYCTAI: Eat more oatmeal – (a) because why should I be only one that has to and (b) it’s good for you. Keep telling yourself that. (50 mins/1 pt)


I’m a hazard to myself / Fiona / The War

Location: on my family couch watching the tube
Mood: slightly poisoned
Music: always in a fight cuz I can’t do nothin right

I almost accidentally killed myself this Christmas.

See, I spent the weekend moving stuff into my new office and wrestled on Saturday. My neck was killing me. So, at the rents, I popped about four tabs of naproxen. Then at night, I took about four tabs of Tylenol PM. I woke up the next morning and popped two more tabs of naproxen cause my neck was still busted.

BUT it turns out my mom actually ran out of naproxen and put Tylenol into the naproxen bottle for reasons she doesn’t remember. So I took 5000mg ((4+4+2)*500mg) of Tylenol within six hours – a potentially lethal dose. Luckily, my brother realized this before I took any more.

Man, I’m my own worst enemy.


Fiona and I aren’t right for each other. It’s not her fault – as usual, it’s mostly me. My hands shake so much that I’m only able to use about 10% of my night shots. She’s already gone.

I need another camera with an anti-shake feature like this, but fast. The pictures I take remind me that the things I write about really happened.


I’m watching The War with my father and brother. Crazy isn’t it? To see how close we are to angels and animals at the same time. I forgot to breathe more than a few times.

Seems like some things never change.

Dunno why, but I find it appropriate for the holidays.


Logan still hates mice and AT&T

Switched mobile phone carries and thought of something

Note to self: After a major car accident and a two-week cold, avoid fencing.



Haven’t seen my furry little houseguest in a few days, but the other thing I said still holds true.

After nine years, I’ve left the devil I know and ended up with the devil I don’t know, but already hate.

Funny, it’s sorta like my personal life, except with customer service, but just imagine…


  • To leave a message, press 1.
  • To admit everything’s your fault since we’ve met, press 2.
  • To perform the traditional swapping of the stuff, press 3.
  • To find out things you really don’t wanna know but just gotta know, press…

Hope my 8/2007 is better than my 8/2006.

Location: 7PM yest, heading west on the LIE
Mood: sore
Music: ni wang ji wo xing ming
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