Tag: good things

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A BBQ in NJ

A Burger and a Pool

Pak invited us out to a little thing he was having with his friends. His pad out in NJ has a pool so I brought the boy to go for a swim.

The boy and I were at my gym and I thought we had plenty of time to get out to NJ but there were alla these train delays so we RAN to catch the bus to NJ with just two minutes to spare.

While running to the right bus, the Firecracker met up with us.

Her: (laughing) I heard some weird slapping sound and I realized it was the two of you with your slippers, running.
Me: (breathless) We try to make an appearance.

We got there a bit late so everyone else was winding down but it was fine as the boy wanted to go swimming anywho.

Him: There are so many bees.
Me: Those are yellowjackets.
Him: Is that better?
Me: No.

I was so busy with the kid that I forgot to take pics. But trust me when I tell you that he had a grand time.

Told Pak and his girl about our cruise.

Me: There’s even a ship with a go-kart track.
Pak: Get outta here.
Me: Legit. Here. (show him a video)

Afterward, we went to Mitsuwa for – what else – more food…

Me: We come alla way here and you just want McDonalds?
Boy: Yes!
Me: (sighing) Fiiiine.

…before we went home.

It was a pretty nice day except we got devoured by mosquitos, which is exactly what happened the next day when we went on an impromptu trip to see the surgeon’s wife in concert.

But I’ll tell you about that in the next entry.

Location: The Wallace with the Firecracker and her cousin
Mood: slightly sotted
Music: I’m soaking up the good times now (Spotify)
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Travelogue: Mexico 2023 Pt 4 – Ruined Ruins

We almost got stranded in Mexico

There were a lotta fun activities on the ship for the kids but every so often – besides eating and catching up on some reading – there was something that I really liked.

Like the baby race.

I’m honestly embarrassed how hard I laughed at it all.

And, while the food wasn’t quite as good as I had on the NCL and Celebrity ships I had in the past, did manage to eat my weight in shrimp and snow crab every day for lunch.

Her: You’re not eating anything else?
Me: God, why would I? Maybe a salad, though…

And, while we didn’t get a chance to get onto a glass-bottom boat, we did get to go on one excursion in Mexico in Cozumel…

…to see some Mayan ruins, which was incredibly cool.


For the most part, the trip was fun for everyone; no major fights or anything of the sort.

Honestly, after my past few relationships, it’s kinda shocking to just have a fight/argument-free vacation. It was…refreshing.

Which is not to say it was perfect.

The kid and I got into a tiff because he disobeyed me about something and put himself into a lotta danger AND we almost missed our bus getting back to the ship.

Which, of course, woulda ruined our trip entirely as that meant we might have missed the ships sailing home.

The tour operator was not messing around when he said he’d have to leave us behind if we weren’t back on the bus in time because they actually left a family of four that were sitting in front of us on the bus behind.

So, I read him the riot act once we got back to the ship.

Me: You gotta make better decisions, kid.
Him: OK, papa. I’m really sorry.

Honestly, that unpleasantness aside, I’m really not sure a kid could ask for more when it comes to a nice vacation.

Besides the parties, there were fireworks on the ship – twice!

Room service dessert…

…and a pirate night.

Ultimately, the kid didn’t wanna leave the ship and asked if we could come back again the following year.

Me: Well, if you pay for it, for sure. But we may need to wait a little while before we can come again.
Him: But we can do it again, someday?
Me: Sure. Someday, kid.

Him: Promise?
Me: Promise.

Back to the real world in the next entry, folks.

Location: Alphabet City, having some dumplings in a playground
Mood: fat
Music: I don’t wanna leave but I got places I wanna be (Spotify)
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Travelogue: Mexico 2023 Pt 3 – Hot Diggity Dog!

A pit stop in the Bahamas

Him: I wanna go to the Kid’s Club again.
Me: OK, I’ll bring you there after dinner.
Him: Hot Diggity Dog!

I’d cruised on a number of other ships before, but this was the first time on Disney.

Friend: You like cruising just because you can read? You can read anywhere!
Me: It’s not the same.

It’s true. There’s nothing like reading a book, looking up, and seeing the above.

Now, I get while cruising isn’t for everyone – the expanse of the sea can be overwhelming at times.

But I – very much – like the idea of being cut off from the internet and everyone else to do simple things like spend time with the kid and just…read.

Suppose we never leave our childhood too far behind.

While I did once go on a cruise that had a hot dog stand, this particular ship had a shawarma/gyro station, which was much preferred.

Him: What are you gonna have for dessert, papa?
Me: A gyro.
Him: (sighs) You’re so silly.

While that was a draw, the main appeal of it to me was the “Kid’s Club,” where the kids could go to have some fun with their peers, and I could have some time to myself and the Firecracker.

This was actually my dessert…more than once.

It was really awesome as a single parent, especially because – by the end of the trip – the boy had a deeper sense of autonomy.

Actually, we both had a deeper sense of his autonomy as he would go to many of the events himself or the Firecracker’s kid.

Considering that he’s gonna be able to self-dismiss at school in a couplea years, this was a good thing.

Still, it’s wild to see him grow up so quickly.

A little too quickly.

Me: Tomorrow, we have an excursion.
Him: Yeah, baby!
Me: Where are you learning this stuff?!

We stopped at the Bahamas where we were supposed to go on a glass-bottom boat but, like that time in St. Martin, it was cancelled because of the weather.

Unfortunately, we weren’t able to go, because that crazy storm Hillary that ended up slamming into California made itself, and its friends, known where we were in the Bahamas.

So, we just spent time on the beach.

Which, honestly, wasn’t a bad way to spend a day.

I cautioned the boy that he had to be covered in sunscreen or he’d get sunburned.

Evidently, I was so focused on him that I forgot – completely – to put it on myself. I got sunburned so badly that my face blistered.

Her: I burn all the time but… I’ve never seen anyone blister like that before.
Me: Well, it’s been a while since it happened to me but, here we are.

I wasn’t miserable for the remainder of the trip but I coulda been better.

The alcohol helped.

We ended up having to run to the ship because it started to thunderstorm but everything turned out fine.

Him: I can’t wait to get back home…I mean the ship!
Me: (laughing) I know what you meant, kid.

Location: on the phone with NYC, trying to understand alla my taxes
Mood: grumpy
Music: He must have somewhere that he’s going (Spotify)
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Travelogue: Mexico 2023 Pt 2 – Oh yeah, baby!

Mexico by way of Miami

The Firecracker’s kid and my kid didn’t know the other was going on the trip and we both managed to keep the surprise for a while.

The Firecracker told her kid before they reached the airport but I waited until the kid was there to tell him what was going on.

Him: I thought you said we were going on a Disney cruise with them next year.
Me: I did…but that doesn’t mean we can’t go this year as well.
Him: Hey…!

The truth is that it’s unlikely we can do something like this every year, what with budgeting and all, but it was nice to surprise him with something where he would have a friend.

Oh, this was the very first cruise where I didn’t leave outta NYC or NJ; we had to get to Miami first, hence, the airport.

The trip there was pretty uneventful, however, I had a bit of panic when I thought I forgot to pack all of his chargers

Turned out that TSA simply moved them to a different compartment of my obscenely large bookbag.

We spent the night in a Miami hotel room, but not before we had a quick dinner at Chili’s.

Me: I don’t want to risk us getting sick before the trip.
Her: Absolutely.

Our server was from Queens, NY, which was a nice touch.

The night was rough because we were right by a canal and people in yachts kept playing their obnoxiously loud dance music until at least 4AM.

I musta gotten no more than three hours of sleep.

We arrived on the ship the next day; the Firecracker and her kid had been on the exact ship before so they told my son everything they could about it.

The kid, being so young, still wasn’t convinced he’d have fun.

Him: There’s a water slide? ON the ship?
Me: Yup!
Him: Oh yeah, baby!

Told him that, if he first ate some fruit and/or vegetables, I’d be somewhat lenient with him on the trip when it came to his food choices.

I can pretty much sum up alla our food conversations like this:

Him: I want a burger and fries.
Me: OK, as long as you have a salad or some fruit first.

Lather, rinse, repeat.

I think he musta had burgers for 9 outta 10 of the meals the whole trip.

I can’t say the same as we ate everything.

Seriously, everything.

But this is getting long so I’ll tell you more in the next entry.

Location: 5AM, cleaning up buckets of vomit because the kid ate something questionable
Mood: grossed-out
Music: Can we still pretend when the summer ends? (Spotify)
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Travelogue: Mexico 2023 Pt 1

First Class and With Children

Robert Benchley once said, “In America, there are two classes of travel: First class, and with children.”

Well, I recently traveled with two kids, and it wasn’t awful.

See, the boy’s seven, soon to be eight.

My MILs taken him across the country to see his cousins, my BIL, at least twice now, maybe three times? And my SIL’s taken him to a few beach vacations, while the ABFF’s taken him away to some upstate pool parties.

Me? Well, with the exception of heading to see my buddies in other states for BBQs, Legoland, and Great Wolf Lodge, I feel that I’ve not really taken him away any place significant in all these years.

When I first met the Firecracker, she mentioned that she and her kid were gonna head to a Disney Cruise.

Her: Have you ever been?
Me: Cruising? Yeah, I love cruising.
Her: What about a Disney cruise?
Me: Never had a kid when I went cruising a lot so, def not.
Her: You should do it. It’s great – the kids go to a private party, and you get some adult alone time.
Me: Sold!

Within a week of our meeting, she told me all the details about her cruise and invited me to maybe go with her.

Me: (laughing) What if we don’t get along and my kid and I book the trip?
Her: It’s big enough for us to completely avoid each other.
Me: These are compelling points.

I actually had a friend of my sister’s hold a cabin for me two doors down from her cabin. Because…well, hope springs eternal. And I had a good feeling about her.

Obvs if it didn’t work out, I woulda just cancelled the hold. But we clearly got along so well that I ended up telling her a few months after we were dating that I did that.

Her: You did? You’re coming?
Me: Looks that way.
Her: Yay! This will be great.
Me: That’s the thing with relationships: The difference between romantic and stalker is just whether or not the person’s into the romantic stalker.
Her: That is so true.

So, the kid and I took a trip to Miami – and some other places – with the Firecracker and her kid the other day.

I’ll tell you all about it.

Location: bed, waiting until noon to leave
Mood: headachy
Music: we talk about life but I wanna live it (Spotify)
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Dinner with my mom’s BFF

My mom’s tribe

After we finished our coffee, we drove by this once-small mall that I used to go to – it expanded quite a bit over the last few years.

Me: When I used to come here, there were only two stores. Now look at it.
Her: Wow, it’s definitely not two stores anymore.

She wanted to get some decorations for her place for the coming holidays.

Her: I always wanted the space and money to have holiday decorations for all the holidays.
Me: That’s tough to do anywhere, let alone Manhattan.
Her: Oooh, look! Halloween decorations!

Afterward, we went to have dinner with my mom’s best friend, her daughter, Mary, and her daughter’s boyfriend.

I met Mary when she was like two years old, and she and my sister were great friends. Her dad, Nick, passed away a few years ago and I told you about him.

Actually, ran into her once years ago not too far from my pad and she got to meet my son, but he was maybe two years old himself at the time.

In any case, my mom’s best friend had been wanting to see my son for a while so we went to have dinner at her house.

We were supposed to order food in, but Mary’s mom had clearly spent all day cooking because there was so much killer food, including appetizers of meatballs that my kid devoured.

Me: Your mom was a major reason why I was fat.
Mary: What?! You can’t blame my mom for that.
Me: I loved everything she ever made, have zero self-control, and can’t take personal responsibility for my actions.

The kid actually ate so many of the meatballs that he didn’t want dinner, which I kinda figured.

The Firecracker and everyone got along just swimmingly, which I knew they would.

Mary said I helped her with her SATs, which I vaguely remember, but it seems like lifetimes ago.

Afterward, we all talked about how we met.

Me: I can’t stand the apps but it’s a part of modern life now.
Mary’s Boyfriend: I didn’t mind the apps that much.
Me: I do have to say that you meet people that you’d never meet otherwise.

I think it’s amazing that my mom and her best friend met and kept in touch all these years.

When my dad died, she was a constant source of comfort and the same was true when Nick died.

Find it pretty adorable that these two immigrant women who speak broken English found each other and have been in each other’s lives for all this time.

Like I said, we spend our lives looking for our tribe.

My mom and Mary’s mom found it in each other, and I think I’ll be forever grateful for that.

Me: Thanks so much for everything! Let’s do this again soon – 30 years is way too long.
Mary’s mom: Yes!
Me: I’ll schedule you in for 2033. Maybe August…

Location: surrounded by kids and water
Mood: excited
Music: bring back the water, let your ships roll in (Spotify)
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A Birthday and then Coffee

Adult Conversation

Because the kid and his cousins on my side have been getting sick constantly, it’s been a while since I’ve been able to see my mom and sis.

But it was my nephew’s birthday the other day so the Firecracker, the kid, and I all took a train ride out to their place the other day and had a kid’s birthday lunch with them.

The birthday boy wanted Burger King so that’s what we did.

Her: You ordered a Triple Whopper AND a chicken sandwich?!
Me: (sheepishly) It’s a small chicken sandwich.

I like to see my family but the Firecracker – because she’s from the south – just likes to be where there’re trees. So, she’s always happy to come with.

After the lunch, the Firecracker and I borrowed my mom’s car to take a drive out to my usual Long Island Barnes and Noble where we just got two cups of coffee and some peace and quiet.

Don’t get me wrong, we both love our kids.

But if you don’t have kids of your own, you can’t fully appreciate the joy of just having a cuppa joe and some adult conversations.

Although, some adult conversations are better than others.

Me: I rode that bus right there for over an hour to go to a date one time. I saw a movie…I think “Scrooged?”
Her: (shocked) Wow! You’re old! (laughs)
Me: (laughing) That has to go in the blog.
Her: I’m sorry! I normally don’t even think about the age difference, but you were on a date, and I was a toddler.

Afterward, we went to some other places and then met with some family friends I’ve known over four decades for dinner.

But this is getting long so I’ll tell you more about it tomorrow.

Location: bed, listening to a radio blast outside, despite being 11 stories up
Mood: wide awake
Music: higher than a kite and I’ve been painting the sky (Spotify)
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You’re kidding me

Phrasing!

Me: Did you pack your lunch?
Him: Yes.
Me: Are you sure you packed your lunch?
Him: Yes!

The boy got strep throat the other day. It was a comedy of errors.

I’d dropped him off at his summer camp and I just arrived home when I got a call from one of the camp counselors.

Her: Your son said he left his lunch on the bench.
Me: You’re kidding me. (walk over to bench) Jesus Christ…
Her: It’s ok, we can buy him…
Me: (interrupting) No, it’s fine. I’ll come back and bring him his lunch. (hang up) *grumble*

So, off I went again to drop off his lunch.

An hour later I get another call.

Her: Your son said he doesn’t feel well.
Me: You’re kidding me.
Her: He said his head hurts and he has a sore throat.
Me: OK, I can be there at 2PM.
Her: Great. We’ll tell him.

Managed to get a doctor’s appointment that afternoon and we saw the doc less than 30 minutes after I picked him up.

That was a bit of good news/luck in an otherwise unlucky day.

Her: Yup, he’s got strep. It’s pretty common. He’ll be fine after 24 hours but you gotta make sure he continues to take the meds for the full 10 days.
Me: Got it, Doc.

What stinks is that that the very next day, we had three orchestra tix for a show that he was dying to see – and they were ridonk expensive for just an hour show.

Him: I can’t go?!
Me: Sorry, kiddo. We don’t wanna ruin other people’s summer vacation, do we?
Him: (sadly) I guess not.
Me: I’ll make it up to you, kid. Promise.

Then, the Firecracker and I started feeling off so we managed to get a doctor’s appointment for ourselves that same day.

There were two funny things about that doctor’s office – the first is that it was the same office I went to when I got into that scooter accident. They turned me away because I had a head injury.

The second funny thing was that there were pictures of TV and movie doctors everywhere.

Anywho, it turns out that neither of us had staph, we were just being waaay too cautious – I had stayed home with the kid for a couplea days until we got the results back just so as not to get anyone else sick.

After we left the doctor’s office, we walked around looking for my favourite bottle of rum.

The kid’s fine now, and back in camp.

As for me, I’ve been pretty good lately, although both the kid’s and my not feeling well meant that the pad got a little messy.

Her: Logan, can’t you clean up? Go put your nuts against the wall.
Me: (laughing)
Her: Your can of nuts, sitting in the middle of your countertop!
Me: Phrasing, Firecracker, phrasing!

She sent this to me recently on IG. I’m gonna assume that means she wants to keep me around.

Location: The gym, for the first time in days
Mood: headachey
Music: I ruin good things ’cause I feel guilty when I’m happy (Spotify)
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Running into a possible past

Making the right choice

Me: Sometimes, I wonder what my life woulda been like if I went to Dresden for that LLM.
Her: Well, there’d be no [son], no Alison, and no Firecracker.
Me: Maybe I’d have a son named, “Hansel.”

My kid went to a bday party around the way today and it was an interesting experience, at least for me.

Years ago, my buddies Johnny, RE Mike, Sheridan, and I all met up a few blocks south of my pad to check out a building that was for sale.

We were potentially gonna buy it, back before everything went to hell and I actually had some scratch.

We almost bought it, but Johnny felt it woulda been too much work. He wasn’t wrong per se but, in hindsight, I wish we did it.

Then again, Johnny and RE Mike never did get along.

Anywho, the reason I was thinking alla this is because the party took place inside the building we once almost bought.

It was markedly different/better than when I first saw it.

Most of the building was renovated with the first floor rented out to a small business.

Alla the things that Johnny was concerned about were addressed and it was fascinating to see the directions the new owners went in.

I spend a lotta time thinking about my possible pasts; what my life would have been like had I taken one path over another.

Used to do it pretty often when I was younger but, as the years go on and the branches accumulate, I find myself there in more situations.


Still, I can’t imagine a life without my son or Alison.

And the Firecracker has been an unexpectedly nice surprise in my life.

Her: (laughs) Yes, but he wouldn’t be [your son], he would have been someone different.
Me: Then I made the right choice then.

Speaking of Dresden, the Firecracker and I’ve been discussing heading to Europe together at some point while her friend was away and staying at the friend’s pad.

I’ll let you know if that happens.

Location: A building I almost bought before my old life ended
Mood: pensive
Music: Down like the sun at the end of the day (Spotify)
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Dinner at Iris’ and then a walk

40-60 Hours?!

Me: Hey, it’s Restaurant Week again.
Her: We should go out…oh, wait, that should be our thing!

Last week was pretty roasting so this week is a welcome respite from the heat.

Having said that, it was the last week we had without our kids so we went out to eat at Iris Restaurant in midtown.

The cuisine was Mediterranean, which is amongst my faves.

Pretty much everything was killer.

Afterward, we ended up walking home and stopping by The Shops at Columbus Circle, particularly Williams-Sonoma.

Me: I like looking at all the stuff I can’t afford, and can’t fit into my tiny apartment.
Her: But it’s still nice to look. (later) Hey – F for Firecracker!

The boy came back not soon afterward, as did her son.

It’s nice to have a bit of time off from being parents but we both missed our kids a lot.

I think the boy’s starting to realize that the effects of a vacation are quickly forgotten once you return to your real life.

Him: Wait, when did I come back from grandma’s?
Me: (puzzled) What? You came back yesterday.
Him: (incredulous) I did?! It feels like so long ago.
Me: (laughing) You’re not gonna enjoy working 40-60 hours a week.
Him: 40-60 HOURS?!
Me: (laughing more)

Location: Staples in the UWS, recycling lithium batteries
Mood: beat
Music: Was it all that easy? (Spotify)
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