Her: Do you wanna meet her? Me: Sure! What about Chinese food in Chinatown?
The Firecracker’s cousin was in town for a few days so we decided to meet up with her.
Ever since the cruise, I’ve been wanting nuthin but Asian food. Don’t get me wrong – unlimited gyros and shrimp will always be a winner for me, but I just can’t go that long without having some real Asian food.
Firecracker: Should Logan just order? Cousin: Sure, I’ll eat anything. Me: Sweeet! OK, where to begin…
Ended up ordering all the classics, including Beef with Broccoli, which is not at all an authentic Chinese dish but it’s still something that I love.
Afterward, we headed to Whiskey Tavern for a drink but it was packed and super loud.
Me: I know – there’s a new bar south of us that I’ve been dying to try out: The Wallace Lounge. Firecracker: Oh yeah! Let’s do that. Cousin: I’m down for anything.
Before we knew it, we were in the oak-walled bar when the singer walked by in a slinky red dress.
Me: I think I know her.
It turns out, it was my friend Isabel, whom I’ve seen all up and down the Upper West Side.
Her cousin seemed to really enjoy being out and about in a laid-back kinda joint. We ended up just chatting for the rest of the evening before calling it a night.
Her: Did you have a good time? Me: Sure! You cousin was nice and now we’re back at a reasonable hour. Her: You’re so old, Lo. Me: A nice night out with nice people, good food, great drinks, a live singer, and in bed and asleep before 11PM? That’s my idea of a perfect night.
The Firecracker’s kid and my kid were away, plus she was in the middle of moving, so I ended up helping her schlepp her stuff here and there.
Her: We have to bring this TV to my new place so I can give it away. Me: What?! That’s ridiculous. It’s gonna rain soon. Just slap a sign on it that it’s a free TV and someone’ll take it. Her: Are you sure? I’d hate for it to end up in a landfill. Me: Trust me.
It was gone in a few hours.
After a full day of that and a million other errands, we decided to treat ourselves afterwards to a drink at a local bar.
We got some appetizers…
…and drinks.
But the night seemed super early yet.
Me: Do you wanna go someplace else? Her: With you? Sure!
Her: Who wrote Robinson Crusoe? Me: Daniel Defoe. Hey, did you know that it was based on a real person named Alexander Selkirk? Just before he died, he dreamt of being back on his island. Her: You know a lotta useless information, Lo. Me: We’re using it right now!
Of course, I ended up spilling hot sauce all over the cards.
Her: LOGAN! I can’t bring you anywhere. Me: (sighing) Evidently not. I’ll get some paper.
After several drinks and food, we walked outta the bar.
Me: I want more food. Her: We can get some chicken sandwiches and a pina colada over at Tiki Chick. Me: Sold!
While the Firecracker went to the restroom, I chatted with the manager.
Me: Where in Africa are you from? Him: Sengal. Me: Oh. I loved a girl once that worked in Dakar. Him: Really? That’s so great. Was that her? Me: (shaking head) No. No, that’s my girlfriend. The girl from Dakar was…someone else. She…got sick. Him: Oh. (gently) Your girlfriend is very pretty. Me: (nodding) I think so too. Thanks.
Location: earlier tonight, walking all over LIC so the Firecracker could see the fireworks for the first time.
Mood: full and tired
Music: Come along, baby, we better make a start (Spotify) Subscribe! Like this post? Tell someone about it by clicking a button below.
Years ago, Alison and I were taking a walk in the hood when we came across a fella at a street fair near our pad selling these cool oversized coasters.
Alisons loved them and picked out four large ones; they’re still the ones I use to this day.
Fast forward to the weekend after last and kid and I were hanging out with the Firecracker and her kid at another street fair when I met the same guy.
Me: I bought a buncha these from you years ago. We chatted about cameras. Him: (big smile) I remember you!
Dunno if he really did, but it was nice for him to say.
I told the kid he could pick any four of the smaller sized ones and I’d get them for him; he did, so I did.
Him: Do you like them? Me: You picked them out, so I like them.
Since it was the end of the school year, I told the kid he could have anything he wanted for dinner.
Despite us seeing some gorgeous dumplings and authentic German bratwurst…
…this is what he choose.
In my defense, I ate the vast majority of it all.
Him: Are you still hungry?! Me: …well, I could eat a little… Him: Papa!
Well, I could…
Dropped him with my in-laws for a spell – as I did last year.
It’s bittersweet, like most things with me, that we have these new traditions, he and I. But it’s not supposed to be like this.
Nuthin is as it was supposed to be.
I spent the day out with him in NJ and had a nice Afghani dinner before I left.
Me: I’ll miss you. Him: I’ll come back!
It was just as well. There’s been alla this stuff that I needed to do around the house.
For example, there were years of leaks into my basement that I needed to fix…
He originally wanted some Cuban-Chinese around me but I told him that our buddy Half-man said this place was the bomb – the last time I had it was with the NFL Player.
Him: Man, this was definitely the better choice! Me: Agreed! Him: I may have gotten a little excited and bought too much stuff.
He did not.
It’s my first summer as a 50 year-old.
And yet, I’m as excited about it as I was as a child.
Me: I like you. Her: (laughs) Oh, Lo…you don’t like me. Me: I don’t? Her: (shakes head, smiles) No, Logan Lo. You don’t. Me: (nodding) Ah…
Location: yesterday, getting sprayed in the most unmentionable places at my buddy’s pool in Long Island
Mood: hopeful
Music: Romantic Piscean seeks angel in disguise (Spotify) Subscribe! Like this post? Tell someone about it by clicking a button below.
Never realized just how true that statement was until I became a dad.
Seeing the kid every day, I don’t really notice how much he’s grown, day-by-day, but looking at pictures, I’m shocked how much he’s changed.
The fella that wrote The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe said something similar: Isn’t it funny how day by day nothing changes but, when we look back everything is different?
It’s so true.
Everything, and everyone, is so different now.
The kid finished school today.
It seems like we just started and it’s summer vacation already.
I (barely) remember taking him to preschool when he was just 18-months old and I gave him a rum-carrier as a bookbag.
Now, he’s a full-fledged kid with opinions – lots of them.
Me: How on earth do you not like 紅豆湯, kid? I loved that growing up. Him: People like different things, papa.
Alison loved this kid so much the short time she was here with him. She woulda loved him to the moon and back if she could see him now.
As I do.
Met up with some a group of fathers from the school for some beer and tacos the other day.
I really only talked to two of them, but a solid eight people showed up. It was interesting finding out about their lives.
Me: You’re a lawyer? My condolences. (laughing) I’m one as well. Him: What do you do? Me: Drink, mostly. When I’m not raising the kid.
I could only stay out for about 90 minutes before I had to pick the kid up from a birthday party he was attending.
Still, it’s one of those things I think I’ll do again.
Thought of it again when I told the kid that he was done with school and that he was starting a whole new grade next year.
Him: Can you believe it?! Me: (laughing) Not really, kid. Not really.
He loves this shirt and wears it *waaaay* too often – no idea why.
Suppose I’ll always think of him as a little boy, even when he’s not one any more.
Like I said in my last entry, I think I understand my dad now more than I ever have before.
After all, all men are little boys to the parents that love them.
Imaginary Tea
I love you more than you will ever know
I love you no matter what you do
I’m gonna hold you as long as you will let me
‘Cause you’re mine, I love you
I loved you before I heard ever heard your voice
Before I even knew your name
I loved you before I saw those pretty eyes
I loved you right away
So, take it slow
Before you know it, you’ll be old and grown
Just remember that I’m always here
Hands you can hold on to
I love you
Don’t worry what anybody else will say
Don’t hurry to break that precious heart
When you try to be like somebody else
Remember I love you the way you are
So, take it slow
Before you know it, you’re gonna be old and grown
Just remember that I’m always here
Hands you can hold on to
And I love you
So, let’s climb every tree
And drink imaginary tea
And speak a language only we can understand
And I will fight back the tears
As we fly through the years
And I’ll keep you as close as I can
I love you more than you will ever know
I love you no matter what you do
And I’m gonna hold you as long as you will let me
‘Cause you’re mine, I love you
It was fun and everyone was nice but then it was time for us to leave.
I expected to head home afterward but my brother and his girl wanted to go to karaoke so who was I to tell them not to?
Brother: Wait, do you wanna come? Me: Well, I don’t *want* to come but… Firecracker: Karaoke! Me: Yes?
So, the Firecracker and I went with them to midtown.
After just a few minutes, we found ourselves at a joint called Duet 53 where everyone sang a song and I tried to finish a huge bottle of sake.
Couldn’t do it.
My brother and his girl hung out until 6AM – hoo-boy – but the Firecracker and I called it by 1AM.
Although, she would probably had stayed out if given the option.
Her: Ready to go home, old man? Me: God, yes…
Interestingly, on the way back home – in the middle of the night – met another couple who saw my cousin’s show on Broadway, Shucked.
She raved about it.
Woman: You have to see it now, before it wins a buncha awards and tickets are sold out everywhere. Me: Oh, that’s high praise, I’ll definitely need to tell my cousin. Her: And watch it! It’s so funny and great. Firecracker: We should go see it! Me: (laughing) Ok, ok, I’ll try to get us some tickets.
Like I always say, New York City’s like a small town a lot.
Location: Janovic paints, buying new paint for my apartment.
Mood: grateful I survived another May
Music: I’ve never lived a simple life (Spotify) Subscribe! Like this post? Tell someone about it by clicking a button below.
This past weekend, the kid had his first “school party” without me.
Basically, the PTA threw a party where the parents dropped off their kids so the kids could spend three hours running around the school, playing games and dancing and such.
The kid was so thrilled, I was excited for him. But he’s growing up way too fast.
Him: You’ll really let me go? Me: Of course. Him: You’re the best dad, ever! Me: You’re not wrong.
The Firecracker and I took the opportunity to grab a drink around the way at a local bar called Jake’s Dilemma.
Her: You got carded! The night’s already off to a good start. (later) Look at us, out at a bar without the kids. Me: It definitely feels weird.
Because we were both actively dating when we met, she and I chat about dating in NYC in general and our recent history.
Me: …so, that was the end of that. Her: Well, compared to my last date, you’re definitely an upgrade. Me: (laughing) I would hope so. Her: Oh yeah, it’s like moving up from a Pinto to a Ferrari.
Me: See that brown building over there? This entire place used to be fulla buildings exactly like that. But you can actually see exactly what it used to look like before it became Lincoln Center. Her: Where? Me: The original West Side Story. It was shot when this was all residential walk-up housing. They literally bulldozed the entire neighborhood the day after shooting stopped.
The kid and I met up with the Firecracker and her kid to come with me to the Surgeon’s place for a little party after his Holi party.
Me: They live in a converted department store. The ceilings are like 15 feet tall. Her: I can’t wait to see it!
She was impressed.
The surgeon made rum cocktails while I cooked up some Korean pork dishes that I got from H Mart near the gym.
Her kid was a huge hit with the Surgeon’s daughters. It was nice that everyone got along well.
His brother, Steel, had another engagement but everyone there was really cool. We met the most interesting fella who worked at Google…
His Wife: (proudly) He invented Chrome. Me: Wait, for real?! Him: (sheepishly) Yeah. I led the team that wrote Firefox and Google hired me to write Chrome for them. Me: Oh man, I have so many questions. (later) BTW, lemme tell you about this hack that happened to me because of Chrome…
It was super late when we all left.
The next day, we all met up with the ABFF and her kids as well and everyone seemed to get along well there too.
Her: Shoot, I don’t have any alcohol. Me: It’s like you don’t even know me.
I feel like my life’s been on hold for years now.
I either didn’t go out or went to things solo. It’s nice to have a companion that wants to do things with me.
After the night out with the Firecracker and her friend, neither of us could make it to the Frenchman’s karaoke thingy the next day.
Me: (next morning) I think I’m still drunk. Her: I need a Tylenol. Me: Why are we even awake?!
But we were scheduled to meet up with her sister and her sister’s fella, both of whom lived across the street from her.
We ended up meeting up at a bar for an afternoon drink, not too far from the tiki bar we were the night before.
The Firecracker and I each got a rum and diet coke – plus wings for me – while they got beers and a huge pretzel for their kid, which made me think of Germany.
Her sister and fella were super cool and grabbed the bill, which was super nice of them.
Afterward, I was hungry for more wings, so we spent a solid 45 minutes walking around the hood looking for more wings, which I ultimately found.
A young couple were arguing – well, the fella was being yelled at by his girl – and the girl asked me what I thought.
Her: (turning to me) What do you think?! Am I right or is he? Me: I’m just trying to get some wings here, lady… Her: No, no, no, is he right or am I? Me: (shaking head) I can’t say. I can say that communication isn’t what you’re saying but what he’s hearing. And he – and everyone else here – is just hearing you yell at him, kid.
There’s a lot more to this story but I’ll end it here.
The next day, I went out to NJ to get the boy from my in-laws.
MIL: We’re having pasta, salad, and garlic bread. Me: I’m not saying no to any of that.
He went out with his guitar to practice and bringing it back was a bit of a pain, but worth it because he had plenty of time to practice.
As you might imagine, the Firecracker and I chat quite a bit now.
I find it odd because the weird commonality of the women I met after Alison have all had very sad stories to tell.
Wonder if it’s something about me that either attracts people with sad stories or perhaps they feel safe because I have my own – obscenely – sad stories.
Perhaps it’s a bit of both.
Me: I’m sorry. Her: Nothing to be sorry about. I’m better off now. Me: (shaking head) I’m sorry the world hurt you so badly, Firecracker. Her: (nodding) I’m sorry the world hurt you so badly, Lo. Me: Yeah…
When the kid’s away for the week, I usually try and hit up the gym every day – sometimes even twice a day.
But, because I didn’t wanna rip open the cut above my eye, I couldn’t go to the gym for most of the time.
It was fine, though.
Was supposed to meet Bryson and The Frenchman for karaoke and drinks on Saturday – I’m not a karaoke person but I like going just to be social and be entertained.
But on Friday night, the Firecracker hit me up because she had a Ukranian friend from Austria in town and wanted to know if I wanted to meet them for drinks. That made hanging out on Saturday impossible.
Her: She’s heading back to Austria tomorrow morning so tonight’s the only night I can see her. Me: OK, I’m down. Her: We can meet at the Tiki Chick. They have $5 chicken sandwiches and is a rum bar. Me: Sold!
Her friend was already at the bar when we arrived.
Because the Firecracker had been there so many times, the bartenders motioned to us when the corner seats were available – despite a huge line – so we took them.
Here’s the thing; I’m a sucker for a pina colada for a buncha reasons:
I also told the two of them that I wasn’t gonna eat anything because I was drinking so many calories…
…BUT I ended up not only getting a chix sandwich…
…BUT ALSO getting comped a foot-long hot dog…with SPAM, because of a mistake they made.
Him: Just take it, we’ll throw it out if you don’t eat it. Me: Well, we can’t have that.
After alla that, I headed down to the restroom.
Even though I was two sheets to the wind, I did notice that there was a drink that someone left on the sink. While inside, a woman called in.
Her: (outside) Is there a drink in there?! Me: Maybe! Her: Don’t drink it! Me: It’s America!
When I stepped out, I handed her the drink.
Her: Whoa, that’s a nasty cut you have there. (looking closely) Krazy glue? Me: How’d you know? Her: I’m a surgeon. (peering closely) You did a good job. That’ll heal nicely. Me: Thanks doc. I promise I didn’t roofie your drink.
Made my way back up to the bar and the Firecracker and told her what happened, among other things.
Her: (afterward) You are a really solid dude. Me: Yeah, I’m pretty fucking wonderful. (thinking) Man, I should NOT have had that hot dog.
Location: this morning, prepping for court and telling them that they’re not ready for what I can do
Mood: upset
Music: If I let you in, I won’t let you go (Spotify) Subscribe! Like this post? Tell someone about it by clicking a button below.
Meant to put up a video of the kid doing a takedown in BJJ in my last entry but I didn’t have the video edited for that so here it is now:
In any case, after the party, we hightailed it to New Jersey to see the in-laws – my MIL ended up making meatloaf and she and I ended up chatting about the time that Alison and she both made the ATK meatloaf.
Her: That one turned out really well. Me: After all these years, I still remember it.
Sorry. I get lost in my head and my memories sometimes.
Left that night to get home and get some work done. On the way home, I heard someone call out my name.
It turned out to be the ABFF’s sister, who just happened to be heading back into the city on the exact same train as me.
One of the things I had to do here while the boy’s away is check out apartments.
Essentially, I never seriously thought about moving – at least not without Alison – in the past but with this massive real estate tax rise, I have to figure out my other options.
The Firecracker had a happy hour with her co-workers the other day and invited me to come along.
I was flattered that she wanted me to meet them. The last time anyone introduced me to their coworkers in a social setting was years ago, although I did stop by an office here and there.
Unfortunately, I’d gotten hit with a MASSIVE hike in my monthly real estate taxes, which threw me and alla my plans for a loop.
Honestly, you wouldn’t believe me if I told you how much more I’m paying per month to live in the same damn place I’ve been in for years.
In any case, I’m never late for these kinda things but, because I was juggling a buncha things related to this unexpected new bill, I was 15 minutes late.
Felt awful about that. The Firecracker and her coworkers were all seated in a nearly empty bar when I arrived.
Me: (breathlessly) So sorry I’m late. What’s the topic of discussion besides my tardiness? Co-Worker1: We were talking about Greece and olives. Me: (taking a seat) Lovely! Do you remember back when there was that whole pink slime nonsense where people were up-in-arms over putting lye in meat? I told several people that, historically, olives cannot be consumed without soaking them in lye first. They didn’t believe me but thank goodness for Google.
It was all pretty fun after that.
Me: Sorry I have to drink and run. Single parenting and alla that. (reach for my wallet) Her Boss: (waving his hand) It’s on me, really. Me: Dammit, I shoulda ordered more expensive stuff.
Because we both had to pick up our kids, and we lived in the same hood, we left together.
Her: (walking outside with me) OMG, you really are good in social settings. Me: Like I said, you can bring me anywhere, anytime, and cut me loose. I’ll make friends. I have zero social anxiety. Her: Seriously!
During the happy hour, I felt like the Firecracker was proud that she was sitting there with me. She was legit bragging about me, which was something that’s not happened to me in ages.
In fact, I’ve been a shady secret for so many people for a long time, for reasons that I understand – and I myself often caused.
Gotta say, it was refreshing to be the opposite of a shady secret. She was saying, This is my fella.
On that note, even though we were super early in whatever this thing was/is between us, we chatted about what we were hoping for and doing.
The details of that talk are kinda private and somewhat irrelevant.
But when it comes to dating – at least in modern America – there’re really only three choices:
Roll the dice and leave someone that’s great to keep searching for your person, who – hopefully – exists.
Cash out and give up. Thank god for Netflix and the gym.
Cards down, all in, and hope for the best.
It’s been years since I’ve done number three. And that was all heartbreak and mistakes, by everyone involved.
Which is why I bounced from number 1 and number 2 for alla this time.
Me: So, what now, then? Cards down, all in? Or we rolling the dice again? Her: (shaking head) No. I told you – I wanna keep you. Me: What about your rotation? Her: There’s no more rotation. I cut the last guy loose yesterday. Cards down, I’m all in, Logan Lo. Me: (nodding) I was hoping you’d say that, Firecracker. All in, then. We’re all in.
