Tag: New York City

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personal

Being Bougie with Ras

What everyone says

As I said, my cousin Ras hit me up months ago because she wanted to take me out to eat. Again.

Me: Was I right about everything?
Her: Yes!!!! You were so right about being reasonable; he used that term dozens of times in our call. Let me take you out to eat, someplace bougie.

I’m really not a bougie kinda eater, as evidenced by my love of $1 pizza slices. Still, she insisted and I’m never one to say no to food, as you’ll soon see.

Our reservations for the restaurant she wanted finally came this past week so she stopped by the gym and got her first roll in almost two years.

Then we showered and went with Chad to get drinks over at Barcade, NYC.

The last time I was there was with Chad and some friends after Alison passed.

Him: Women are just used to being pursued.
Me: It’s prob more accurate that they’re better at playing the game.
Her: You mean dating?
Me: The way I see it, all women are at least blue belts when it comes to dating. Figure that, the average girl has to fight off unwanted male advances 2-3 times a week starting at 14 for like 30 years. Contrast this with the average frustrated dude that probably *speaks* to 2-3 women they don’t know a year.
Her: You two aren’t like that.
Me: Nope. And you’re like a black belt when it comes to relationships too.
Her: Yeah – when they’re not mine. And some people clearly shouldn’t be dating anyone until they get their own lives in order.

Chad went off to go on a date and Ras and I caught a ride to Kochi, cause I’m a sucker for Korean food.

As soon as we arrived, we were treated to some champagne.

Her: My friend told them we were coming and hooked us up.
Me: Great, cause I’m starving.

She got us the tasting menu, which was fulla absolutely delicious – and absolutely tiny – dishes. Each one was a winner.

The alcohol kept coming too. Lots of it was on the house, but Ras made sure our cups were never empty.

Her: I’m stuffed. You?
Me: I could go for a $1 slice of pizza.
Her: You’re kidding me. OK.

So off we went to a pizza joint just down the block. I got a slice and a Jamaican beef patty.

Her: Are you full now?
Me: Do you really want to know the answer?

So off we went to Los Tacos No. 1.

Her: I just want the horchata but I’m buying you the Especial.
Me: Don’t you dare, you…
Her: Too late. You’re the only one that believed in me.

Her: Are you full NOW?!
Me: …yes?
Her: I don’t know how you eat that much.
Me: That’s what everyone says.

There’s more but I’m le tired. Still, my social obligations are almost over.

Almost.

Location: earlier today, being told I could lift more on 36th Street
Mood: fuzzy
Music: Just know that you’re good enough (Spotify)
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personal

Becoming a fatty-fat-fat

I’m a goddamn blast

My son cried this week because I’ve been out almost every night for the past two weeks or so.

Him: I never see you.
Me: I see you every day! We have brekkie together every morning, I get you from school, and we have hours together.
Him: It’s not enough!

Parental guilt is awful. Anywho, this is because, for the first time in years that I went back to my Never turn down an invitation, rule and I’m exhausted.

It’s off again, so don’t invite me anywhere. I’m done until January 2nd, 2022.

Also, I’m ten pounds heavier; I went from 141 to 151 pounds in two weeks. For reasons that will be readily apparent.

For the first time, I met someone with the kid…because she had a kid too. A pretty adorbs daughter.

The woman was exactly my type: Attractive, buxom, wealthy, coloured eyed, wealthy…I mentioned wealthy already.

But…

Her: I hope you don’t mind, I brought pasta for her. She only eats pasta.
Me: Wait, what? But we’re in a Chinese restaurant. In Chinatown. There’re noodles galore.
Her: She’ll only eat plain pasta with some cheese and oil. That’s it. Nothing else.
Me: No fruit? No veggies? What about fiber and protein?
Her: She just won’t do it. (later) He has his own room? That’s great! She does too but sleeps with me every night.
Me: (nodding as the girl begins to bang on the table)

Non. Starter.

I’m at an age when it’s just as important that someone be a match for the kid as she is one for me.

I also met up with my buddy Ollie, who’s actually a black belt in jits despite us starting at the same time. My old coach was just the pits.

That’s him, above, listening to Chad tell a story at the bar.

The plus of hanging out with Ollie – I’ve known him close to 30 years – was that he could corroborate a lotta the crazy stories that I tell people.

Me: Tell him about our buddy that has so much scratch that he covers an entire restaurant’s bill.
Ollie: Even better, I’ve got pics of his wedding. Did Logan ever tell you…
Me: (later) It’s been a long time, man.
Him: (nodding) I read about your wife. Well, I tried to. I couldn’t finish it, I kept crying.
Me: Yeah. You and me both.

On that note, both Chad and Mouse were out with us. Mouse and I got along a lot better, I think, than we had in the past year. It was really nice, TBH.

She showed me pics of her and the kid that I’d never seen before and I gave her a kiss on her cheek.

Me: Thank you for that.
Her: (shrugging) Sure. Google shows me these pics all the time.
Me: Send it to me, will you, please?

She was nice enough to give Chad and me a lift to the subway in my old whip. Once she dropped us off, he and I promptly each got two slices of $1 pizza.

Him: God. Dollar pizza is so good.
Me: I’m getting us another slice.

On the ride home, I got up so an older couple could sit together.

They were so grateful. I teared up a bit because they looked so in love. She was so happy to sit next to him and lay her head on his shoulder.

I wonder if I’ll ever have something like that when I’m their age.

The next day, my cousin Ras came by to roll for a bit. She wanted to take me out because she got a crazy promotion that I (kinda) helped out with.

But that’s a funny story so I’ll tell you that part tomorrow or sometime this week.

Today, I was out during the day doing…stuff. BUT, it was the first night I was going to be home for dinner in weeks.

The kid and I were going to have dinner together when both Chad and I got hit up by a buddy of ours at the gym. It was his birthday and he wanted us to go meet up with him in Koreatown.

While he did mention it previously, I don’t think people realize how much planning a parent – especially a single parent – needs to be social.

Him: I am having a small get together at Let’s Meat at 7:30 for my bday. Not really sure if I need to get a reservation for a Sunday night but lemme know so I can get a headcount.
Chad: Crap, you mentioned this yesterday. I’m hesitant to say yes because it’ll be clutch for me.
Him: One of you have to make it otherwise I will be unhappy.
Chad: Logan, this is your moment to become a hero.
Me: Wait, today? I don’t have a sitter. Dammit, I love KBBQ!
Him: I’ll let this one slide since you guys have been running the gym so well.
Me: Please, this was a non-vite – I woulda come had I gotten an earlier heads up, you rat bastard.

It’s just as well. I’m becoming a fatty-fat-fat.

Her: We’re right by you.
Me: Jesus Christ. I need lead time, lady. LEAD TIME!
Her: You’re no fun, Logan.
Me: With enough lead time, lady, I’m a goddamn blast.

Location: earlier today, asking her if she liked KBBQ
Mood: plump
Music: You’re something that I can’t forget (Spotify)
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The cool kids (2X)

Sprinting away

My mom misses my dad a lot these days. It’s the holidays, I think.

Her: It’s been four years since they left. Time moves so fast.
Me: The hours drag but the years sprint away. Yes.

While the gym was closed, Chad swung by to go over some plans for 2022.

The weather’s been freakishly warm and nice in the city lately; we’re obviously going to hell in a hand basket what with climate change and all but I suppose one takes any win one can.

We got a salad and then went to get a cup of coffee.

One of our students lived around the way so I hit him up; he’s the one with the second nicest apartment I’ve ever been to.

Me: Are you around for a cup of joe with me and Chad in the hood?
Him: Now? Yes! I am a cool kid…
Me: Thank god, we need at least one in the group.

We ended up going to his place and chatting for a spell, which was interesting because he had a different perspective on a few things as compared to Chad and me.

The views from his pad didn’t hurt.

The next day, I went to get my COVID booster (finally) and chatted to the girl ahead of me.

Me: Not everyone can pull off a red leather jacket.
Her: Only cool kids can!
Me: Oh, then we have a problem.

I got both the flu and COVID shots in the same arm; zero effects on me as a whole but my arm hurt like the dickens.

Today, I took my first class in the gym after the construction was done. Looked like a million bucks.

Me: Well, that wasn’t cheap but the guy did a killer job.
Him: And the mats feel great too.
Me: Considering how much we spent, they’d better.

Back before my world turned to shit, the weeks between Thanksgiving and New Years were a whirl of parties to meet women and clients.

In a sense, I’m back there again, but mainly to numb the pain of holidays more than anything else.

Got invited to seven parties just this week alone. Went to two of them so far.

One was my law firm, and their annual office holiday party. Even though I’ve not been steadily active with them since Alison got sick, I was touched to still be invited to all the reindeer games.

They ordered porterhouses from Benjamin Steakhouse and I ate most of it, I think.

It was a more interesting party than we had pre-COVID for a number of reasons, including that one of our buddies made partner and we had a slew of new, young attorneys in the office.

Her: Anyone want to go outside for a smoke? This one is covered with gold leaf.
Boss: Well, it is legal…
Me: I, personally, am offended by this suggestion. I will go and supervise.

I’d forgotten was it was like to be a young and optimistic attorney.

Seems like a million years ago.

I’d not met most of them but they’d heard stories of me so it was kinda like they knew me but I just met them. I felt a bit like a celebrity.

But I had to leave early with my boss because I had another party to attend, this time with an old client.

On the way there, a busker was playing With Arms Wide Open by Creed and I thought of my son.

He was on my mind when I got there and looked for my friend when I met this pretty blonde.

Me: Where’s Jen?
Her: Oh, she got wrecked and left early.
Me: Well, you’ll have to keep me company, then. She’s the only person I know here. My name’s Logan.
Her: (laughs) Hi, Logan…

She was 23 (of course) and a huge fan of illicit pharmaceuticals. But loads of fun. That’s all I’ll share for now.

It was late when I got home. Fun Logan and alla that.

I’m still trying to figure out where I belong, if I belong anywhere.

Suppose as long as with the kid, I belong somewhere.

Location: earlier today, talking about the UCC and Kokomo just off Grand Central
Mood: curious
Music: I hope he’s not like me, I hope he understands (Spotify)
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Rosalita

My definition of success

For someone that doesn’t like to be social, lately, I’ve been more social than I intended.

Her: I can stop by with some wine.
Me: I’m not a wine drinker.
Her: But I am. Keep me company.

The gym’s been closed for the past few days to do some construction but on the last day we were open, my buddy Miller and I grabbed a cup of joe afterward.

Me: I think I have PTSD from everything that went down.
Him: (laughing) Dude, you’re the poster child for PTSD.

He told me I should try meditating to try to deal with the insomnia and intrusive thoughts.

It’s hard to quiet my racing mind but I did it because I promised I would, and I always keep my promises.

Besides, it was nice that he cared. Can’t say it was life-changing but I’ll try to keep it up.

Afterward, had dinner with a new friend.

That weekend, met up with a buddy of mine in Chinatown with our kids. We were playing phone tag for a while so it was good we finally got together.

He’s about six-foot-three so his kid, despite being a year younger than mine, was exactly the same height.

Him: What did you expect? You’re not gonna raise a basketball player.
Me: How dare you!

Brought everyone to the same Cantonese BBQ place that Chad and I go to before our Scenic Fights shoots. As always, I thought I ordered too much, but we ended up killing everything.

Him: I’m in contract for a condo on the UES. $3.2 million, plus I gotta cover all the transfer taxes and both attorneys.
Me: Jesus Christ, that’s a lotta scratch. And that was fast too.
Him: (laughing) Been looking for over a decade, figured it was time to just do it. It’s pushing our budget but it had to be done. There are only 80 units in the whole building and they were selling out fast. Oh, they have a pool so you two should come by.
Me: You’ll regret saying that.

Afterward, we brought the kids to get some dessert. It was nice that they got along so well.

We then headed out to see my mom. This is my son running down a hill to see her.

It was sweet.

While he hung out with his cousins, I met up with another buddy of mine who just got a new whip.

Him: I totally overpaid. For what I paid for this, I coulda gotten a BMW last year. Damn supply-chain issues.
Me: Had I known it’d be like this, I woulda kept my ride instead of giving it away.

He was in a mood because his girl’s dad didn’t approve of him because he wasn’t born into wealth, even though he had a great job and loved the dude’s daughter.

I told him about Rosalita (Come Out Tonight) by Bruce Springsteen. The song tells a story about a fella that loves a girl but the family hates him because he’s a musician.

In it, Springsteen sings these, somewhat arrogant but, great lines that go:

I want to be your man
Someday we’ll look back on this and it will all seem funny
But now you’re sad, your mama’s mad
And your papa says he knows that I don’t (have any money)
Whoa, your papa says he knows (that I don’t have any money)
Well, tell him this is his last chance to get his daughter in a fine romance
Because the record company, Rosie, just gave me a big advance.

Me: What can you do but live your best life? Years ago, I uploaded this to YouTube because Alison and I talked about what being a success meant. (played the above video for him) That’s pretty much the only thing I’ve ever uploaded to YouTube prior to Scenic Fights. But that’s my definition right there.
Him: I’m not there yet.
Me: You will be. The best revenge is to have a successful, happy life. With his daughter.

Afterward, he drove me back to the kid and my family, but not before I grabbed Burger King for the kids.

I ordered so much food that they needed four people to put it together.

There’s a lot more to that story but nothing you’d be interested in hearing.

The kid was pooped by the time we went home.

Him: Can we do all that again?
Me: Sure. Be the type of person that people want to hang out with, and you’ll always have people asking you to do just that.
Him: (sleepily) OK, papa.

Location: having coffee and tea overlooking Central Park with Vazquez and Crowley at 3PM on a Tuesday afternoon
Mood: busy
Music: Now, I know your mama, she don’t like me (Spotify)
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Success models

We can’t stay here

The dinner itself was fun and the food was killer. It was also good to see the fellas outside of the gym and in our regular selves.

Him: I’m starting up a new venture with some big Hollywood stars.
Me: Do you need a lazy, high-functioning alcoholic lawyer?
Him: Oh, we have one of those already.
Me: Dammit.

It was so much, in fact, that we ended up staying out until they turned on the lights in the restaurant.

Him: I think they’re trying to tell us something.
Me: Yeah, we don’t have to go home, but we can’t stay here.

Most of what we discussed is unprintable, either because it was about the business or because it was about our personal lives.

Him: …and then the kid and his friends came out with guns and started firing.
Me: Well, I’m not visiting you there, then.

Told you once that you’re the average of the five people that you spend the most time with. These people should be your success models: The people we wanna be.

But there are probably just as many failure models in your life as there as success models. These are the people that are people like the consistently poor decision-makers, the immature, the selfish, the willfully ignorant, etc. Unfortunately, it’s a lot easier to end up with failure models than success models.

Him: I remember some of the advice he gave me.
Me: Man, taking business advice from him is like taking relationship advice from someone that’s never been in a good one.

Chad and I know a fella that’s super-focused on building, essentially, a martial arts cult for some mythical yesteryear versus a commercially successful business for 2022 NYC.

It’s mental masturbation full of nonsense versus concerted, dispassionate grind. And a life focused on mental masturbation produces precisely the same result as a life focused on actual masturbation. After all, if you keep doing what you do, you keep getting what you get.

He’s our walking, talking, cautionary tale.

In the end, we picked the investors because they’re all very successful in their respective fields and all had a skill or attribute that would be a tangible benefit to the gym and each other.

A plus is that they’re all extremely good fighters in their respective arts, which helps if you’re running a martial arts gym.

It stopped raining when we finally left.

Me: We should do this again, soon.
Investor 1: I’m away for the next three months at [a resort I own]. You guys should visit.
Investor 2: I’m away for the next two months in [the Caribbean with my family].
Investor 3: I’m in Europe for a day for work this week but back for the holidays and then traveling again.
Me: Clearly, I’ve made some poor life choices. If I didn’t have the kid in school…

Speaking of the kid, he and I put up a Christmas tree together. I bought a slightly larger tree than the one that was damaged, and I had to toss.

It was the first time we decorated a tree together. Man, he was so happy. I told him the story – as best I could – of each ornament, alla which had a story with them.

Him: The bell really works!
Me: (laughing) Yes, yes it does.
Him: It’s so cool! (thinking) I miss mommy.
Me: (sighing)

When he went to bed, I sat there and just stared at the tree for a while before I poured myself a glass of fine aged rum and thought about all of my possible pasts.

God, I fucking hate the holidays.

Location: earlier yesterday evening, looking at diamond rings
Mood: hopeful
Music: He’s been living in a pure illusion (Spotify)
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Déjà vu with burgers and lobsters

A business dinner

Me: I think I’ve been here before.
Him: You don’t remember being at a place called Burgers & Lobster?
Me: (pointing to wall) Well, I remember seeing lobster pots at a restaurant I went to, but that whole time was a blur.
Him: (laughing) I’m gonna say you’ve been here before.

The other investors of Paxibellum and I had our end-of-year dinner this week to go over where we were with the gym.

I screwed up the times so two of them were already at the bar when I showed up – it was raining and, despite it being just a few blocks from the gym and me with an umbrella, I showed up with my bottom half pretty wet.

Chad picked the joint, which is odd because that dude does not like seafood.

After I settled into the bar, I felt this huge sense of déjà vu. It was only when I saw the lobster pots on the wall that I realized that I’d gone there with Nadi and Kung.

Nadi about to devour some lobster, four years ago.

I had spent the night before with Gradgirl and she had brought over a bottle of vodka, which I recall I enjoyed.

Me: Have you ever had some fine aged rum?
Her: No, is it any good?
Me: It’s my favourite because if you take really bad rum, and put it on a ship…

I’d just met her and she was honestly just lovely.

We communicated via disappearing messages the entire time so I literally have nothing to remember her by except my own cloudy memories, which bums me out more than I can express.

I remember waking up the next morning and, like most of that time, not wanting to do anything but stay in bed with my bottles of rum/vodka. And her.

But I’d already told Nadi and Kung that I’d meet up with them. So, I remember crawling out of bed and getting ready to go.

I don’t recall if Gradgirl stayed or left that morning but I remember that she was the first person I actually wanted to spend any time with versus going out to put on a good show for my friends.

To be honest, there’s a good part of me that wonders if she was real at all. Nothing seems real before I recovered from COVID.

Maybe I made it all up.

In any case, it was strange walking into the same restaurant, this time with a completely new set of friends, save for Chad, whom I really didn’t know all that well at that time.

Haven’t talked to Nadi and Kung in a while; suppose I’ll ring them up this week. I think I cried twice sitting with them that morning. Don’t remember much of that time.

Except that so many people – friends, new friends, and strangers – were kind and worried about me.

I dunno if I truly thanked everyone for their kindness during that time.

Hope they know I appreciated it then, and still do now.

Getting back to now, Chad and the remaining investor showed up (another was away) not long afterward and we got seated.

As it happened, the investors and I literally sat in the same area that Nadi, Kung, and I sat at four years prior. Fuck…it’s been four years.

As for Gradgirl, I’ve not seen her in years but, in my head, she’s finally happy with her fella.

We should all be happy with our person.

There’s more but I’ll finish it up later on this week.

Location: earlier today, trying on some new gear at Paxi
Mood: drunk
Music: You’re better off this way, I was never gonna stay (Spotify)
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Thanksgiving 2021

Yet another visit to a Medemerge

Chad and I’ve been dealing with some really crazy and creepy stalkers lately.

Honestly, considering what we do, we’re probably the best able to deal with such things but it’s still pretty horrific what we get sometimes.

I shudder to think what your average woman has to deal with out in the world.

Spent Thanksgiving with Alison’s family; her aunt and uncle came by to join the boy and me there.

Since he was the only kid there, my son was pretty restless but it all ended up fine. The assortment of desserts didn’t hurt.

Me: There’re cupcakes, pumpkin pie, apple pie, and strawberry rhubarb pie. Which one do you want?
Son: Pumpkin pie…WITH cupcakes.
Me: Well, it is Thanksgiving…
Him: What are you having?
Me: All the pies. I think pies are better than cake.
Her: You’re crazy!

I took the train home that night just to have some time to myself.

Part of the station was flooded; it seems like every place is flooding these days.

On Saturday, the gym had an open mat instead of regular classes but my wrist was still messed up so I ended up fixing some artwork we had installed a while ago but couldn’t get running right.

Speaking of pie, Mouse was there and brought a large apple pie to the gym. Afterward, several of us went to a local bar to get a drink and we brought the pie in tow.

Some old friends from our old gym were there and it was nice catching up. A fella was there from our old gym and I recalled when Pac and I went to his mom’s funeral and had dollar pizzas and tacos outside in the rain. I got our buddy a sandwich.

I think that day was the first time I talked to Pac outside of the gym.

Him: Thanks for coming that day.
Me: Of course. I’m sorry I had to.
Him: And I’m sorry for everything you had to go through too.
Me: You and me both, man.

The next day, I woke up and my wrist was just awful. This is despite not rolling.

My MIL brought my son back that morning and then my brother and his girl came by for lunch.

Because they were here, I decided to go get an xray of my wrist to finally start the process of seeing if I had to get an MRI and, finally, surgery if need be.

Me: Can you watch the kid for me? I might be up to an hour.
Brother: Sure.

So, I took a deep breath and went to the same medemerge that I always go to.

Ended up being there a lot longer than I expected but it was a mixture of good and bad news.

Doc: I don’t think it’s something that requires surgery but I’m not an orthopedist.
Me: So, you think I should get an MRI?
Her: It wouldn’t hurt.

They gave me my x-rays and I went back home. Afterwards, my bro and his girl went off to the Hudson Yards and the kid and I just had dinner together.

Pac, KG Betty, another female friend, and Chad all gave me a ring afterward for various reasons.

It was nice that people wanted to see how I’m doing.

But it looks like I’ll be heading to a hospital regardless if I want to or not.

Me: Why me?
Her: (pause) For some reason I trust you.
Me: You don’t even know me. (pause) I’m not good at hospitals for reasons I’d rather not get into.
Her: I don’t have anyone else.
Me: (sighing) OK, I’ll help.

On that note, there’s only Christmas and New Year’s left.

Location: the pad, making soba noodles for the kid for dinner
Mood: missing home
Music: Our house I’ll miss the most (Spotify)
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I don’t mind

Dreaming of Paris

Made three women cry recently; all essentially strangers. One was business, two were personal.

Me: Do I come off as scary or a jerk?
Him: You do get intense.

The business one was over video chat. In no way, shape, or form did I attack her personally, I just wanted to know why, literally, everything my client was promised did not come through to fruition.

In 25+ years of business, I don’t think I’ve ever had anyone just break down in front of me. I don’t think I even raised my voice. No cursing, no name calling.

Her: Industry average is 15-20 days.
Me: We’re at 21 days. So you’re telling me that you’re not even doing average work. You’re offering me below average work. Lemme ask you, if you came to me and I said, “I’m gonna provide you with below average work,” would you hire me?

And then…it all went sideways. With waterworks. My client and I just sat there, wondering what the hell just happened.

The other conversations didn’t go any better.

One was sad and involved someone else that lost her family. I knew I wasn’t her fella but we traded our sad stories, anywho.

Her: Are you ok now?
Me: (laughing) “Ok,” is a very relative term. (later) What about you?
Her: I’ll be ok. I’ll leave you alone now. Thanks for listening to me.

The last was an acrobat who cooked Greek food. I seem to have a thing for short-haired adrenaline junkies with a particular look.

But she said something that irritated me no end.

Her: I’m always the girl that people want to have fun with but never the one they want to stay with. (later) If you send me an Uber, I’ll come on over.
Me: It’s late. Kid’s got school tomorrow.
Her: I don’t mind if you have a kid, BTW.

My kid is not someone you don’t mind. My kid is made of awesome. You’d be lucky to meet him, let alone, have him in your life.

That ended things before they could begin.

There’s this song where this guy asks a girl what she’s looking for and she answers, Something that I want.

It’s weird. My buddy and I meet new people all the time. It’s in our nature.

But he finds something in them that intrigues him whereas I just can’t seem to want anything from anyone.

He sees colour everywhere. I only see grey.

Him: You and your rules, Logan. They’re insane.
Me: My rules keep me, and those around me, safe. You’re safe because of my rules. Imagine if I didn’t have them. We’re where we are right now, because of my rules.

I’ve been day-dreaming of Paris lately. Sometimes, I regret deleting people from my phone and life.

But it’s one of my rules.

Speaking of fuzzy memories, on the plus side, I got some sleep recently thanks to my friend Miller, so I’m relatively more clear-headed.

Clear-headed is a relative term as well.

MIL: Did you buy me cereal and have it sent to my house?
Me: I’m gonna say no but lemme double-check.

Me: Who did you hear that from?
Pac: You, Logan. You told me that.
Me: Jesus Christ. I cannot be trusted with anything these days, man.

Location: home, with four pounds of steak, somehow
Mood: rested(ish)
Music: He’s been living in a pure illusion (Spotify)
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personal

Ziggy and the kid

Diddling around Chinatown

Me: Man, that is one small laptop, can I see it?
Her: Sure, you can diddle around on it.
Me: I haven’t diddled around with anything in a while, lady.

RE Mike shot me two top-tier tix to Midsummer: A Shakespearience the other day but I’ve been so cloudy lately that I declined.

Him: Bring a date!
Me: (laughing) No one’s made the cut to meet you yet, man.

He sent me the below to show me what I missed out on. Alla my days and nights are blending together again so it woulda been a waste anywho.

I’m always dreaming again.

Or at least, sleepwalking.

Friends and almost friends have been asking me to head out with them and I’ve said yes as often as I’ve said no.

That’s a lie. If I’m turning down RE Mike, I’m turning down most people. But some people make the cut. Some.

Gotta say, though, that my most memorable night recently has been with the kid.

See, he’s been taking Chinese class and this week’s lesson was about Chinese food so I decided to take him downtown to eat dinner with me.

So, right after his class, whisked him to Chinatown to try out the dishes he learned.

On the way down, we ran into zombie Ziggy Stardust…

Son: Did you know him?
Me: No, I just met him now.
Him: Then how did you know his name was Ziggy?
Me: (laughing) That’s a long story. But he was nice, wasn’t he?

..before we got to Chinatown…

Him: There’s so much Chinese [writing everywhere]!
Me: Hence the name, kid.

…and worked our way to the restaurant to try out some steamed veggie dumplings, pan-fried dumplings, scallion pancakes, and soup dumplings.

Waiter: Are you expecting anyone else?
Me: Nope. It’s just the two of us. We’ll eat it all.

I was pleasantly surprised how much he enjoyed the steamed vegetable dumplings. Not everything was a surprise, though.

Him: (making a face) What is that?
Me: Tea.
Him: I don’t like it.
Me: It’s only the second most popular beverage in the world. (leaning over and whispering) It’s ok, I prefer coffee myself. Shhhh…

We killed everything and he was still hungry afterward. He’s definitely my kid.

A group of women lawyers were in the the table next to us, talking shop, and I locked eyes with a pretty brunette.

But, like I said, I’ve been so fuzzy lately, I figured it’d just end up as another date to nowhere.

So, I tossed her a wink, the waiter two Jacksons, and walked the kid around the place.

Him: Can we do this again?
Me: Anytime, kid, anytime.
Him: Tomorrow!
Me: (laughing) Strike and withdraw. Lemme rephrase that…

He’s getting the shot tomorrow.

I may be muddled-headed these days but the only thing that’s crystal clear is that I gotta keep him safe, any way I can.

You see, he’s my only treasure…

Location: earlier today, being told he was special
Mood: grey
Music: I had to phone someone so I picked on you (Spotify)
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personal

Typically what one does

Hey, kid

Him: Great, now *I’m* paranoid.

This was probably one of the busiest Halloweens I’ve ever had, mainly because of the kid and some other things that I don’t want to discuss, publicly.

Speaking of discussing things publicly, I mentioned to some people in my gym the the other day that I almost never say the kid’s name out in public.

Because I have zero desire for the world at a whole to know my son’s name. It’s the same reason that I don’t put up pics of him and his face.

Look, this kid’s gonna grow up with the least amount of privacy the world’s seen to date – and it’s only gonna get worse.

There are almost no pictures of me between the age of 14 and 25 years of age, beyond what my family has. Because, my dream job throughout college was to be an analyst (not a field agent) at the CIA. I actually made it through two rounds of interviews before I got a rejection.

Never did find out why. But that’s neither here nor there.

Find it so odd when parents emblazon their kid’s name on their backpacks and put up endless social media photos of them. That strikes me as a bad time waiting to happen.

I’d say I was paranoid but my luck is of the stripe no one wants so, really, I’m just acting on the information I have.

Me: Honestly, this kid is only thing that really matters to me. So, fuck everyone and everything else.
Him: Seriously though, I agree with everything you just said.

Still, I can’t keep him at home alla time – especially since he didn’t get a real Halloween last year – so we did make it to one house party where he was Chewbacca…

…one street party where he was a Ninja Turtle…

…while stopping by stores to get even more candy…

…and the usual group next door.

Me: Thanks for inviting us, as always!
Him: (laughing) I heard a bunch of people invited you.
Me: It’s the kid, not me. Everyone loves the kid.

On another matter entirely, our producer for Scenic Fights just told me that we have more subscribers (148,000)  on our channel than Esquire does on their channel (147,000).

And Marie Claire for that matter…

Plus, I got the funniest call the other day.

Him: Hi, I’m calling about the kali class for Paxibellum.
Me: Sure. (explains to him the procedures) When you get there, my business partner, Chad, can set you up.
Him: Wait, Chad from Scenic Fights? Is Logan going to be there as well?
Me: Logan will not be there. Because Logan’s with his kid that day. I know this because, I’m Logan.
Him: WHOA! I’m a huge fan. You answer your phone?
Me: (laughing) Yes, that’s typically what one does with one’s phone.

Fans. Chad and I have fans. Don’t even need huge fans, tiny fans will do.

What a kick in the head.

It’s the first good kick in the head I’ve had in a while.

Location: earlier tonight, the gym for the my first Monday
Mood: curious
Music: think it’s finally, finally, finally, finally, finally safe (Spotify)
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