Tag: dialogue

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personal

Easter 2011

Brooklyn view of Verrazano Bridge


Me: Do you have a charger? I need to charge my phone.
Her: Just turn it off.
Me: What if someone needs to calls me?
Her: Who’s going to call you?
Me: (turning off phone, muttering) Someone might call me…

Work’s slowed down a bit so been busy writing, taking classes, and wrestling. Regarding the writing, got a short story idea in my head. Regarding the classes, it’s just a lotta online classes they make you take to maintain your licenses. It’s a lotta classes. Regarding the wrestling, am still terrible, but just slightly less so. A buddy I’ve not seen in a while came up to roll on Easter Sunday; just found out he split with his girl. Sucks; it’s always the disappointment that gets you.

I try to take advantage of these lulls when they come but it’s a weird aspect of eating what you kill: when you’re busy, y’wish y’had downtime to do something besides work; when y’have downtime, y’worry about the lack of work.

Went out to see HG’s rents for Easter Dinner where I stuffed myself silly. Stopped by to see her grandparents. Realized that her grandma’s the only grandma I got now.

Took twice as long to get back as usual because of the rain and holiday traffic. There never are enough sunny days, yeah?

Location: taking more CLE on the computer
Mood: okay
Music: I live on the corner of Grey Street and the end of the world
YASYCTAI: Fire up those classes. (8 hours/1.0 pt)
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personal

My old crockpot

Old Rival Crock Pot

Thanks for the birthday wishes.

Decided to make some braised brisket in red wine the other night so I whipped out my old crock-pot. It’s been in my family since I can remember – maybe 25-30 years? My mom used to make this killer spaghetti sauce she learned from my Italian neighbor Dot. It’s also where she made chili from a Mexican neighbor and how I made a lotta my chili too.

When I moved outta my family home, my mom asked me what I wanted and I asked for that.

Her: This old thing? Why don’t you buy a new one?
Me: Cause I want that one.

Anywho, put it on the counter top and noticed the back had cracked and a leg had fallen off. Managed to prop it up on a stacka bank checks to make the brisket but it was clear it was it’s last dish.

They’re cheap. Like $40 for a good one. And this one’s got flowers and lotsa stains on it; doesn’t match my clean white kitchen. But it was my bita home in my apartment and I’m sad to see it gone.

You don’t love a picture causesa the paper it’s printed on, y’love a picture because of what it represents.

Man, I loved that broken old thing.

Ha – suppose someone’ll say that about me some day. One would hope, anywho…

Braised beef with herbed carrots and coconus

Location: taking CLE on the computer
Mood: nostalgic
Music: The only way to really know is to really let it go
YASYCTAI: Buy a new slow cooker. (10 mins/0.5 pt)
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personal

A weekend in food

Me: You wanna…?
Her: Sure.
Me: (five minutes later) Actually, I feel like a fatty-fat-fat.
Her: Yeah, I’m beat. (laughing) We are so married.

Friday night, came home to a Spanish Dinner that Heartgirl picked up; it’s good to mix it up some. We were getting a bit tired of the usual Chinese/Italian/American we’ve been eating for a while. Wish I had pix but we were so voraciously hungry that we just tore into it.

Menu: Pan Tomaca, Bravas, Empanadas Argentinas, Brochetas De Pollo, and Chorizo A La Parrilla.

Saturday, went out to Brooklyn for work in the AM. Coincidentally, an employee of the client was in the same train car as me all of way there but we both didn’t really recognize each other. When I walked into the client’s he started shouting and laughing, “Man, I knew I knew you!”

When I got back, HG and I walked over to the Whitney Museum across town to check out the Edward Hopper exhibit. Kinda underwhleming – they didn’t have Nighthawks and wouldn’t lemme take pics but they did have Sunday Morning. Afterward, went out for Japanese at our local sushi joint before staying in and watching The Next Three Days.

Menu: Ramen, Dragon Roll, California Roll, Chicken Teriyaki.

Sunday, was supposed to stay in but a buddy a mine had the building nexta his apartment catch on fire so at 9AM, I’m in a taxi to Times Square to check out the fire damage. It was pretty bad. Walking up 5th Avenue, the guy at the local halal cart recognized me at and asked me if I wanted some. Breakfasta champions.

Went downtown again Sunday to pick up a new camera; more on that some other time. Syd was so long ago.

Menu: Rice, meat, and grease.

Was a lot busier a weekend than I wanted it to be but still good. S’funny how stuffing our faces’s so basic and complex a parta our lives.

So, that was my weekend. Hope yours was good.

Location: staying in today to finish some work
Mood: optimistic
Music: and so it goes, this soldier knows
YASYCTAI: Pick an artist to like. I like Hopper cause he’s NYC. (time/1 pt)
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personal

15 Things Every Man Should Know

Things a guy needs to know to be a man

Me: Do we have any crazy glue?
Her: I think so, why?
Me: Sliced open my finger.
Her: Do you need stitches?!
Me: That’s what the crazy glue’s for.

My boss recently commented that, cause I don’t watch or play any sports, I’m missing something in the manhood realm. Thought that was pretty funny. Cause I got my own lista of what a man should know/be able to do and sports’s nowhere in it. Suppose we all do.

Here’s mine in no particular order – a man has to be able to:

  1. Cook something.
    • At least one thing very well without consulting a recipe. For me it’s chili – it can be any type of food but you gotta know it well.
  2. Tell a story well
    • Can pretty much assure you, it’s the difference between a good night or a great night. Basic rule: if it adds nuthin to the story, leave it out. Eg, if you mention that he’s wearing a white paisley belt, it’d better be crucial to the story. You have to be funny and engaging enough so that a girlie touches you on your shoulder or arm three times in a row. BTW, if that happens, you must kiss her. Unless you’re married or otherwise involved, at which point you smile and politely leave.
  3. Throw a punch and take a punch
    • I like the good old fashioned cross, but that’s just me. You gotta know how to throw it, pull it back, and throw it again. As for taking it, try not to do it often. Ducking’s a good secondary skill to possess. As a corollary, if you’re defending your pride and have a mortgage, a wife, or a kid, walk away. If you’re defending the cause of your mortgage, your wife, or your kid, keep moving forward.
  4. Do 50 push-ups
    • If you can’t, you’re an old man. The thing is, most fellas don’t have to be old men for a while.
  5. Know that what people think of him is none of his business
  6. Be loyal
  7. Know how to keep a secret
    • This is important. If you’re known as a guy that can be discreet, you will make more money and have more respect than the guy that can’t. Plain and simple.
  8. Use the right tools for the job
    • Traditional: Hammer, screwdriver, wrench (monkey, adjustable, and combo), etc.
    • Modern: Google operators, Ping, POP/IMAP, etc.
  9. Quote something that actually means something to him
  10. Have some female friends and not try to bang them.
  11. Know that his parents did they best they could
    • Or didn’t, whatever, you’re a man, let it go. They were probably kids when they had you and had no idea what they were doing.
    • Extra credit if you realize you were no prize either.
  12. Know when to use F__ and when not to use it
    • It’s like salt, a little goes a long way and too mucha it ruins a lotta hard work.
  13. Give and take a compliment
    • For the former: The occasional and honest Nice XXX with a quick nod works wonders.
    • For the latter: Yeah? Thanks, is appropriate for just about everything.
  14. Control the fear
    • It’s always there. If you’re not afraid, you’re nuts, stupid, or grossly underestimating the gravity of a given situation. Unclench your fists, breathe in deeply through your nose, out through the mouth – imagine you’re filling up your lungs from the bottom up, like a glass of water. Then think. Quickly.
  15. Stop bleeding
    • Minor wounds – pressure, hydrogen peroxide, crazy glue or bandages with lotsa changes.
    • Major wounds – pressure, call a professional, more pressure
    • Also, studies have shown, saying positive things to a gravely injured person increases their chance of survival. No, don’t have a quote, wish I did.

There are more things one should know how to do but aren’t specific to men, maybe people in general. That’s for some other time.

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Location: surrounded by papers (they’re going to kill me)
Mood: good, except I need to fix my car, I’m DIY so The Car Starter is for me.
Music: sweet woman and my two grown up sons
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personal

After marriage you smell better

Her: It’s so nice that the paper doesn’t fall behind the printer any more.
Me: That’s part of my job as a husband; to make sure things don’t annoy you as much.

Been noticing some slight post-marriage changes. For one thing, I smell great. Not that I smelled particularly bad pre-marriage, mind you, it’s just that before I just had soap; now I have choice of:

  • Regular scented soap
  • Antibacterial scented soap
  • Moisturizing scented soap
  • Body wash with exfoliants
  • Body wash without exfoliants
  • Anti-fritz shampoo (with accompanying conditioner)
  • Colour-fast shampoo (with accompanying conditioner)
  • Shine-enhancing shampoo (with accompanying conditioner)
  • Straightening shampoo (with accompanying conditioner)
There’s more but let’s not belabor the point. Did not know half these things existed.
Note that by mixing-and-matching the above, I can go a month without ever smelling the same twice. Not gonna lie, it’s pretty nice though there have been days when I smell like a bowla fruit.

As for her, my collection of the Cartoon History of the World does not seem to enriching her life (much). However, in addition to moving heavy objects and offing the occasional critter, I’ve been busy fixing things. So far, fixed a Roomba and a printer.

Feel the need now to stalk and kill something and then grill it.

Or just make more chili.

Location: off to roll
Mood: groggy
Music: Too low to find my way Too high to wonder why
YASYCTAI: Fix that other thingy. (60 mins/1 pt)
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Playing the Settlers of Catan Without Umbrellas

Turns out I didn’t make a mistake with that client; took a long hard look at what I did and realized that I was, in fact, right. But the damage’s already done and calling up a client and saying, “I told you so,” is rarely good form.

———-

Me: (putting on white paisley belt) I’ll wear my wedding ring to keep the women at bay.
Wife: I’m sure that white belt will be more effective.

Went out to see some of my old buddies including Paul and WM; we usedta go out and pick up women with umbrellas in our drinks. Now we meet up for board games – the Settlers of Catan. Which’s fine, cause we’re all secretly a little geeky.

Was supposed to only be out for a few hours but I lost the first round and I hate losing so we played one more round until about midnight (which I won).

For me, it was kinda the perfect night: chicken wings, rum, board games, and, when I got home, got to climb in bed with a beautiful woman.

Me: Hey, I’m back. (sheepishly) Had a lota wings and rum.
Her: (sleepily smiling) I can tell. G’night…

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EC76b0VZQog

Location: Brooklyn
Mood: ambitious
Music: I’ve got to let it go And just enjoy the show
YASYCTAI: Buy some boardgame; everyone should have one. (15 mins/1 pt)
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Rudy’s Bar and Passing the Bar in NYC

Me: Is this the week?
Him: This is the week. Today I become a man.
Me: You know your have to wrestle a bull, right? It’s part of the process – they just don’t tell you these things.
Him: I heard you have to do it in a loin cloth. That ain’t right.

A buddy of mine is getting sworn in today as an attorney. I barely remember mine – it was over a decade ago. Crazy how quickly time flies.

Near my pad is a place called Rudy’s Bar that’s been around as long as I’ve been and probably longer. It’s a dive dive bar. The kinda place y’go and have to wipe down stuff before you sit or touch anything.

But the best thing about the bar – better than the $3 beers – is the fact they give you all the hot dogs you want. Beef hot dog. So long as you’ve ordered at least one drink, they keep giving you dogs. The only options’re mustard or ketchup (the answer’s always mustard, in case y’didn’t know).

Met up with another lawyer buddya mine over there; haven’t seen him in almost seven years. Last time, we grabbed some Fatburgers out in San Fran. He’s got two kids and a wife now out in the Cali burbs.

S’funny but a good number of my buddies didn’t end up with the person we all thought he or she’d end up with. Life keeps throwing those curveballs.

Him: I take it you didn’t marry the doctor?
Me: (laughing) No, that was a while ago. (standing up) Guess I’ll be seeing you again in about seven years. What is that, 2018?
Him: Works for me.

Location: getting dressed for the gym
Mood: thoughtful
Music: And I’ll be buyin’ ev’rybody drinks all ‘roun’
YASYCTAI: Buy something different for lunch. (15 mins/1 pt)
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business personal

Owning up to mistakes

Her: …I liked Capture the Flag.
Me: “Capture the Flag?” Never heard of it.
Her: Really? Well, there’re two teams and you run after the other and when you tap…
Me: That sounds terribly violent.
Her: (shakes head)

Been thinking a lot about having a kid. Like to be a dad but dunno what’s in store for us. Suppose the only thing to do is to keep the head down and clock those dollars while we wait for him or her.

Speakinga clocking dollars, got screamed at by one of my newest ones cause of a rookie mistake I made; been doing what I do for over a decade and I’ve never made this mistake but the client wanted a rush job so I rushed and screwed something up. So the client tore inna me.

While I wouldn’tve made this mistake had I not been rushed, it was still my fault. I should have either turned down the gig or done it right. Since neither happened, it was ultimately on me. It was a stupid, embarrassing mistake so I let him finish yelling at me, apologized, and said, “Lemme make this right.” Spent the resta the day trying to make it right.

The thing with being in the service industry’s that, even if you’ve had a client for a decade and’ve never screwed up, you just need one mistake and you’re gone. Just the way it goes.

Mistakes happen, not much you can do but apologize, learn from them, and move on.

On a brighter note, over the weekend, went out for dinner with the wife. We don’t go out much any more so it was like going on a date; we laughed about our old lives. We’re gonna try and do that more often.

Also, got a letter from Gshok. Opening up the mailbox and pulling out something that’s not a bill or ad’s rare for me. I think I’ll do the same for her today.

It’s a rainy Monday but good weekends usually carry me through to about Tuesday.

Location: chair, listening to the rain outside
Mood: tired
Music: In this world, it’s hard to get it right
YASYCTAI: Incorporate the words “big pimping” into a sentence with someone today. (10 secs/1 pt)
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The people that point and the people that run in.

Her: (glancing at clock) It’s 11:11 – make a wish.
Me: (thinking) I hope those people’ll be ok.
Her: That’s a good wish.
Me: (as clock changes to 11:12) Made it just in time. Maybe it’ll come true.

There’re people in life that you’ll meet that’ll always say a contrary position. If you say it’s black, they’ll say it’s grey. Daytime, it’s early evening.

These people aren’t necessarily bad, but they are needy. They need to feel superior, to be listened to, to matter.

A variation, however, is the pointer. The ones that feel they know some truth hidden from the rest of us. The ones that spring up at every tragedy and say, “God is punishing (insert childhood issue here)” or “Well, they really brought it upon themselves.”

In all of human history, there’s no tragedy so great where some cruel person won’t stand to the side and point, not at the calamity, but the victims.

Some, like Gilbert Gottfried, point and laugh. Some like Glen Beck, point and blame. The reason’s the same, that neediness. Coupled with an inability to do anything but point.

But often, there’s no tragedy so great where there won’t be someone else that runs past them to stand in front of complete strangers and say “Stand behind me, I’ll protect you.” It’s people at their very best.

As of this writing, 50 people keep walking back into a nuclear reactor to try to get it under control. Can’t even wrap my head around that.

Said once that troubles strip away the fat of your lives to who we really are. Sometimes, under the fat, you find a Gilbert Gottfried there, sometimes you find a hero.

Both make you shake your head in disbelief but for totally different reasons.

Location: watching this all unfold
Mood: pissed off
Music: we could be heroes, just for one day
YASYCTAI: Text that number – REDCROSS to 90999. (10 secs/3 pts)
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It’s been a weird (and gross) week so far.

Her: He’s alive!
Me: Barely…

Food poisoning. Unpleasant. Very unpleasant.

Was fine until about 2AM the other night when I started getting the chills and ended up in a cold sweat. Got outta bed when my legs gave way and I crashed onto the floor. Never happened to me before.

HG woke up and asked why I was on the floor – don’t remember what I said. She said that I said that I had to get to my phone to tell my gym partner I wasn’t going to be able to show up the next morning to wrestle. Ha, even in the depths of delirium, I’m responsible.

When I didn’t come back, HG said she found me curled up in the fetal position in the other room and had to drag me back to bed. That part I kinda remember.

So, had my first work-free day in a while the other day. Not the ideal way to get it but y’take what y’can get.

On the topic of gag-inducing things, been to many places in my life – a horse farm, landfill, etc. But last week, went to the single most horrid smelling place I’d ever been to in 37 years on the planet: a chicken farm. Can only imagine what it smelled like in summer.

It’s been a weird (and gross) week so far.

Location: bed, all day
Mood: drained
Music: come to me, run to me, do and be done with me, cold
YASYCTAI: Take a break (24 hours/2 pts)
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