Tag: family

Father’s day 2014

Communication and having to white it up

Him: (proudly) That’s my son.
Me: Hey, little fella.

Got a random call this weekend from an old college buddy. He was in town for just a bit and wanted to stop by with his new son.

Because I married so late in life, I’m one of the few people in that group of friends that have no kids.

It’s weird, even now, realizing that so many of my friends are parents and on that next stage of their lives. If I ever do become a father, wonder what type of one I’ll be?

Speaking of fathers, it’s Father’s Day. For a number of reasons, I wasn’t able to see him, as much as I would want to.

Sadly, something else that’s different with my friends is that many of the them don’t have the luxury of simply picking up the phone and calling them any more.

I do, though, and try to whenever I can.

Me: Hey dad, just checking to see how you’re doing.
Him: I’m good. Getting fatter.
Me: That makes two of us.

For many reasons, wish my Chinese were better. One, so I could talk to him more; another so that, if I ever did have a kid, would be able to talk to him or her in it.

Him: I feel bad, sometimes. English isn’t my native language. Chinese isn’t yours. It’s like me and my dad. We couldn’t communicate.
Me: Yes, but communication isn’t what you say, it’s what the other person hears. So, I think it’s fine.

The wife speaks another language fluently, so I don’t expect her to pick up a third. Although I do try to teach her some important phrases.

Me: Can you order me a 榨菜肉絲麵?
Her: I’ll never be able to say that, I’ll have to white it up.

Location: yesterday, 11AM, the West Side Highway
Mood: excited
Music: say honestly you won’t give up on me And I shall believe
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Tags conversations, dialogue, family, overheard in ny

personal

My nephew and a video

When I met my nephew and made a video

My sister had a kid recently. Was in her hood recently seeing yet another doctor when my mom and I popped over to meet the little guy.

There’s something weird about holding your sibling’s kid for the first time. I recalled holding my sister as a kid and now I was holding her kid. Found that so interesting.

He however, found the whole matter of meeting me less interesting, as he merely yawned after meeting me and closed his eyes to sleep.

Can’t blame him much. I rarely say anything that can hold a candle to a midday nap.

Speaking of saying anything, shot a quick video promoting the book. You can take a look at it above and let me know what you think. Perhaps you’ll find it more interesting.

Spent the day traveling around New York City and Long Island yesterday. Tomorrow it’ll be New York City and New Jersey. Moving around a lot these days.

Dunno if I’m actually getting anywhere though.

Location: yesterday, two different doctor’s offices
Mood: hard to say
Music: looking for means to pave the way, for brighter days
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Tags family, writing

personal

The broken and the baked

A tender spot in my heart for cripples, bastards, broken things, and deep fried foods

Headed out to Queens yesterday to see another doctor.

Ended up grabbing lunch with my brother, who’s in town for the week. The thing about the two of us, and my sister, is that we have pretty strong stomachs, which I think is direct result of us growing up poor. My parents tried their best to give us a rounded diet but we essentially ate anything we could get our hands on.

Him: (picking at fish) This is terrible. Do you want to try it?
Me: No! (thinking) On second thought…

There’re all these dishes that are the result of poor people taking scraps and making something amazing out of them: oxtail soup, collard greens, liverwurst, broiled bone marrow, and fried rotten tofu (as seen above).

People are no different from the food they make.

In Game of Thrones, Tyrion Lannister says, I have a tender spot in my heart for cripples, bastards and broken things.

I think I’m similar, for similar reasons.

Some of the most broken things in the world aren’t easily seen as such. A good tailored suit can cover up almost anything.

But I suppose that if you had some device that could look and see what we look like on the inside, I’d be a patchwork of duct tape, splints, and glue. All baked in steady childhood of beans, canned tuna, caned ham, white rice, and slightly stale bread.

I have a tender spot for those of people patched together and baked in a similar way.

My brother’s a doctor and I’m a lawyer, but there are few things that give us as much simple pleasure as eating at a local dive.

If I meet people like us in the world, I’ll ask if they want to grab a $5 meal at the local dive around the way.

And if they’re members of my tribe, they’ll have no problem sitting down to a meal complete with plastic forks and sticky condiment bottles.

Me: We probably shouldn’t have eaten all that.
Him: Yep. (standing up) I’m going to get some caffeine.
Me: Good call.

Location: snowed in again
Mood: full
Music: I can’t be free from all of the things that I used to be
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Tags conversations, dialogue, family, home, nostalgia, overheard in ny

personal

We’re titanium

Riddle me this

A riddle from Good Riddles Now:

Something all men have,
but all men deny.
Man created it,
but no man can hold it.

What is it? – the answer here.

On that note, last week was quite possibly one of the worst weeks of my life. And I’ve had some bad weeks. Got two separate calls for two separate issues; one was horrible, the other merely terrible.

Call 1
Her: It’s the doctor.
Me: S___t.

Call 2
Him: So it’s not good, it’s not any worse than we thought, but it’s still not good.
Me: Let me sit down.

But at some point, you just get tired of being sad/anxious.

So my brother went out to drink, and my wife and I went out to dinner around the way. We sat next to an actress we’d seen a few times on television who was very friendly (good) and very loud (bad).

Afterward, my wife and I took a short walk around our neighborhood.

She also made me some oatmeal cookies, so that’s a plus.

Finally got to have some rum again, too.

Me: We’ll be ok.
Her: We’re titanium, Logan. We’re frick’n titanium.

Location: -3 hrs, shoveling the walk
Mood: deflated
Music: Shoot me down, but I get up
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Tags challenges, conversations, dialogue, family, overheard in ny, troubles

personal

There’s always room for more down

Post author By Logan Lo
Post date 2014/01/22
8 Comments on There’s always room for more down

On my knees again

Doctor: You’re not having a good day?
Me: I’ve had better.
Him: (pause) Well, it’s about to get a lot worse.

So after I wrote the last entry, went on with my day. Later that night, got another phone call for a wholly different reason.

In 40 years, think I’ve honestly been on my knees twice. This is a third time. There are things that one knows but does not truly believe in life.

Like last time, I could handle it all, if it was only one at a time.

Spent the day slogging from offices to offices in the blinding snow, trying to make sense of a litany of things that make no sense; making decisions I’m ill-prepared to make.

Him: Well, you gotta figure that this is rock bottom.
Me: No, there’s always room for more down.

But I went to teach my fencing class last night and for about 90 minutes, I got to put down the things I’d been carrying all day.

It’s a blessing to have things in your life where you can put down the weights you bear.

Student: This wasn’t what I expected.
Me: We’re not here to dance, we’re here to fight. We’re here to struggle. Life’s a struggle we all lose one day. But until then, we struggle.

Never saw that student again.

The thing with leaving things at a doorway is that, ultimately, you have to pick them up again on your way out.

So I do, trudging home in the snow, bearing it.

And I swear that the whole goddamned weight of it all is sinking me deeper into the snow.

———-

If you write or see me, I won’t tell you so please don’t ask. As with last time, I’ll tell you when I’m ready.

Location: yesterday, three hours in a frozen car
Mood: heartbroken
Music: It’s true, the suffering shapes you
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Tags challenges, conversations, dialogue, family, overheard in ny, troubles

personal

The one with the barber brainteaser and Nighthawks

Post author By Logan Lo
Post date 2013/12/18
3 Comments on The one with the barber brainteaser and Nighthawks

And I’m selling my Edward Hopper: Nighthawks

There this old joke/brainteaster I heard once where a stranger arrives at a small town and needs a haircut. There are only two barbers in town so he visits both of them.

The first one he goes to has a terrible haircut and looks like a mess. The second one has a perfect head of hair. The man immediately turns around and goes back to the first barber who had the terrible haircut – why?

While you’re thinking about that, I’ve been sick and have been fighting a lot of insomnia. I got up the other day to bake some cookies.

Was awake enough so that it was me and not Sleepy Logan.

Back to the brainteaser – it’s not that hard; if there are only two barbers there, the first barber must have gotten his hair cut at the second barber and vice versa. So the first barber’s terrible haircut is because of the skill of the second barber.

There are tons of logical issues with that but if you have a kid, it’s a good one to ask.

Which brings me to the picture above. The wife and I decided a while ago to buy each other one ornament a year for Christmas. That’s what she bought me.

She tends to buy me fun, homey-type ornaments while I buy her elegant classy ones. And the reason is the same – I tend to think of her as very classic and proper while I’m a lot more casual.

She bought it from Carolyn’s Christmas at the Columbus Circle Holiday Market. Their ornaments are made in the Andes Mountains “using age-old methods of sculpting bread dough.” So it’s an ornament made of food, which I find kinda appropriate for me.

Apparently, they were super nice and spent a good amount of time getting the wording (“The Lo’s!”) just right so I thought they deserved a little mention here.

On a different matter entirely, I’m selling my Nighthawks painting by Edward Hopper; it’s a framed poster print in a dark brown hardwood frame. It measures 44″ x 32″ and I paid $300 for it a few years ago (and it’s in perfect condition since it just hung there) but can sell it for half that.

Here’s an entry on it that I wrote back in the day; I still love the painting but it’s a little dark for our living room now.

If anyone in NYC’s interested, lemme know.

OK, off to drink some more hot liquids and have a cookie.

Location: desk, wrapping up for the deal
Mood: sick
Music: Lately I’m obsessed and I need the rest. I hope that you’re impressed
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Tags family, insomnia, photos of food, story

personal

Pizza vs. Chili

Having endless pizza in NYC

Me: Can I ask you a question?
Her: (continuing to stare at computer screen) Sure.
Me: What does the fox say?
Her: (turning to me) Ring-ding-ding-ding-dingeringeding!

My brother was in town last week and it was a (relatively) light work load so I managed to spend some time with him.

He lives out in LA now so each and every time he comes out here, he has the same thing for almost every meal: Pizza.

Although we did try and balance it out with a salad. But still, it was mostly pizza.

Her: Are you ok?
Me: (coughing) I just had a *huge* piece of anchovy in my salad.

It’s a bit like when I go out there and have chili. We are very different but very alike at the same time. It’s a sibling thing, I suppose.

We did break up the pizza-fest with the occasional – equally nutritionally-bad – fro-yo. This one was from when we visited his friend out in Queens.

Him: (sitting at table) OK, I’m done.
Me: (pointing to his cup on the far right) Are you sure? I still see some space in your cup where you could still put in more stuff.

After he left, tried to eat a little more healthfully. The wife had made some homemade granola – pumpkin for her, regular for me.

Me: Which one’s mine?
Her: (calling out from other room) I wrote it on the label. The one that’s not my name.

Location: waiting for the phone to ring
Mood: fatty-fat-fat
Music: Wa-pa-pa-pa-pa-pa-pow! Wa-pa-pa-pa-pa-pa-pow!
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Tags conversations, dialogue, family, good things, overheard in ny, photos of food, picturing food

personal

From the Archives: Safe, Grace, and Mercy

Post author By Logan Lo
Post date 2013/10/09
6 Comments on From the Archives: Safe, Grace, and Mercy

Sal, a letter, and the difference between Grace and Mercy

My best friend’s granddad is a fella named Sal. He and his family have always been kind to me. I remember we once discussed Dean Martin. Good ole Dino. Good ole Sal.

Sal just passed yesterday so I’ve got to dust off my black suit and say goodbye. I’m sad, not so much for him, because he lived a good and long life, but for those he left behind.

After all, A man’s dying is more the survivors’ affair than his own.

I wanted to write more but I think I said it best already in the two posts below.

Safe
I thought of my own grandma when I heard the news. We were close because she lived in Taiwan and I’m an insomniac. When I was up at 3AM, I had someone to speak to. After she passed, when 3AM rolled around, found myself just sitting in the dark by my lonely. So I wrote her this letter.

Grace and Mercy
And in that entry, talked about the difference between grace and mercy. One is when you get the good things you don’t deserve; the other is when you don’t get the bad things you do deserve. You can read which one is which here.

Back on Monday.

Location: in front of my closet
Mood: sad
Music: don’t remind me to forget
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Tags death, family, goodbye, motivational, nostalgia, observations, passing, tiny wisdom

personal

The Moon Festival 2013, the Walnut family, and the revolving door

Post author By Logan Lo
Post date 2013/09/18
2 Comments on The Moon Festival 2013, the Walnut family, and the revolving door

Good souls are a comfort in the world

Growing up with my parents, there was a revolving door of house guests. Not really sure why.

I’m guessing it’s partly because my parents were immigrants and probably couch-surfed for a while when they first came here and remembered what that was like. Or maybe because sometimes people are just nice for no reason.

A brother and sister stayed with us a while, apparently. I don’t remember them well – as I said, revolving door. For years afterward, their parents would send us a huge box of walnuts once a year from their backyard. Then they moved, ergo, no more walnut tree, ergo, no more boxes.

But I still called them the Walnut family.

In any case, went home to see the rents yesterday. Was a spur-of-the-moment type of thing because my mom took the day off from work and a project I had finished up early.

When I got there, my mom said it was the Moon Festival this week and showed me a cake she got from the Walnut family.

She hadn’t heard from them in years and immediately rang them to thank them. It was then she heard that the mother had just died. Breast cancer.

F____ breast cancer.

The father said that one of the last things the mother said was, Send the Lo’s a cake this year. They were so nice to the kids.

Then my mother started to cry.

Her: I wish I knew. I would have done something for her.
Me: You were nice to her kids. That’s a lot. After all these years, she remembered it. So I think that’s a comfort, knowing that there are good souls in the world.
Her: She was a nice woman. And now (the husband’s) he’s by himself. It’s so unfair.
Me: (patting her on the shoulder) It really is.

Location: yesterday, the family garden
Mood: somber
Music: you come to me on a summer breeze, keep me warm
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Tags conversations, dialogue, family, hope, human condition, overheard in ny

personal

Vlog: Where I tell two stories about pizza

Post author By Logan Lo
Post date 2013/05/13
2 Comments on Vlog: Where I tell two stories about pizza

A Homemade Pizza and a Spinach Pizza

No time to do a proper entry so I just posted a video above.

Below is a pizza from my pop to my mom on Mother’s Day. Clearly, I am this man’s son.

Let me know if you think I should vlog more, I know i have the energy for it, I’ve always been interested in making money on youtube.

In other news, I’m going to be posting at around 3PM Mondays and Wednesdays for a bit. New work schedule coming up.

Location: Courtroom
Mood: amused
Music: Tom, your circuit’s dead, there’s something wrong
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