Tag: hope

Categories
personal

Chinatowns and the Space Shuttle

Why does every major American city have a Chinatown?

When I was traveling around Europe once, had the idea of stopping at every Chinatown I could find and having the beef with broccoli there – yes, I know it’s not traditionally Chinese but, then again, neither am I.

In any case, went to the one in Paris, London, and (kinda) Berlin and Hamburg. None in Malaga.

This writer for Freakanomics wrote that every large American city he likes has a Chinatown. The reason, it turns out, is because in history, it marked a stage in development where a city was large enough to require a railroad. And back in the day, when you wanted a railroad built, you called the Chinese.

Instant Chinatown.

It’s all of these unexpected consequences that I find so interesting in life. Like when the British became a superpower by using copper-plating on their ships instead of plain wood.

It used to mark a point in development of nations when they headed to space.

In 2004, the Cassini spacecraft went to Saturn and the Today show had Dr. Neil deGrasse Tyson on. Matt Lauer asked him how America could justify a $3.3 billion dollar mission such as that.

Dr. Tyson replied, “First of all, it’s $3.3 billion divided by 12 – it’s a 12 year mission. Now we have the real number: less than $300 million per year. Hmmm…$300 million. American spend more than that per year on lip balm.”

Right now, we spend less than 0.5 of a penny out of every dollar on space.

Think it it’s a direct consequence that we stopped trying to go to space that America’s fallen behind in science and math. People like Matt Lauer see the dollar figure and fixate on that, not seeing the jobs created, the side technologies (like microwaves and the Dustbuster), and all of the inspiration for nerdy kids like myself.

By now you’ve seen a million pics of the space shuttle making like LL Cool J and going back to Cali. As a kid growing up in the era of the space shuttle, it’s remarkably sad to me.

At this rate, we’ll have to head to China and build Americantowns.

Suppose I’ll have to go there to get a traditional American Beef with Broccoli.

Location: about to go to the post office
Mood: nostalgic
Music: I’ll soon be back again, that’s what I said in China
Subscribe!
Like this post? Tell someone about it by clicking a button below.

Categories
personal

Chris Gethard and being kind for no reason

It’s easy to be cruel for no reason; it’s just as easy to be kind

Actually, that same day I saw the foozball table from my last entry, I was in Chinatown earlier. Was starving so I popped into a dive that had 20 dumplings for $4. That was great. Not so great was the fact that I went to the gym not more than 20 minutes later.

Me: I don’t feel so hot.
Him: Do you think it mighta been the 20 dumplings you just ate?
Me: (thinking) Nah…
Him: (knees me in stomach)
Me: C’mon!

———-

As you know, I was very fat as a kid.

5′ 3″ 185 pounds fat. 44 inch waist at 13 years old fat. Hella fat.

Then at 15, lost all the weight and – comparatively speaking to what I used to look like – looked pretty good. Was also a lot smarter than most people my age due to the fact I had zero friends and studied all the time.

So I was thin, smart, and not so bad looking. Combined with years of getting bullied, I became just a rotten teenager. Arrogant and mean. And I was that way for a while. But that’s a story for another time.

In any case, I see what happened to me as the interwebs as that on a massive, global scale. Where the powerless and nobodies can become superstars. And it’s cliched how quickly people can become cruel for no reason when given the opportunity.

It wasn’t until much later in life that I realized that anyone can be unkind; that’s easy. Ellen DeGeneres said that most comedy is based on getting a laugh at someone else’s expense. Think that’s true.

A reader once wrote me that he thought my blog was the most “un-ranty” one he reads. Suppose that’s because, I realized that I got lucky in life. And my comedy, if any, is at my expense.

Anywho, I bring this all up cause my brother just sent me a link to a comedian named Chris Gethard who wrote a long, heart-felt message to an anonymous fan that felt suicidal. I enjoyed it for a number of reasons – one of which is that it talks about suicide, which I think more people should do. The other of which is that it was kind.

Say it all the time: Thank goodness for the good souls.

Location: a yellow bed
Mood: still crazy busy
Music: cannot reach a pen for me to draw the line
Subscribe!
Like this post? Tell someone about it by clicking a button below.

Categories
personal

Help please?

Public phones in LA

My week’s been unpleasant. Compounding matters, couldn’t go wrasslin to blow off some steam. But I’ve been teaching my fencing class I had to go to that. Which is a good thing.

After class last night, walked by this very nicely dressed old lady who sat on a milk crate in front of a small metal cart. Her clothes were neat but slightly dirty. Her hair was up in a bun. She smiled meekly at me and held out a small crumpled paper bag.

Her: Help please? (holding out paper bag)
Me: I’m sorry ma’am. I just came from the gym.
Her: (sad smile) That’s ok, thank you.

Walked back to my pad and thought of another little old lady, which is a story for another time.

Got home, took a shower, and then got dressed again. Told my wife that I was going to head back out and give her a few bucks. She told me to be careful.

I think I can handle a little old lady.

A few minutes later.

Me: Hello. I’m sorry, I didn’t have anything before. It’s not much, but I thought it might help. (handing her money)
Her: (smiling) Thank you for coming back.
Me: Do you have any place to go tonight?
Her: Tonight, yes. And for for two more weeks. That’s why I’m collecting money.

She held up her crumpled paper bag that was filled with random bills. I told her to be careful and she said she would be.

Wanted to walk her home but figured that would scare her. So I stood around the corner for just a bit to make sure she was ok before I went home, feeling guilty about my dumb luck.

Didn’t give her much. Wish I could have given her more.

Of course, it could all be a scam but this rang true – even to my jaded NY ears. And it bothers me cause home is such a powerful word. It’s distinctly separate from house, apartment, pad, etc. It is safety, comfort, and belonging.

Chivalry’s dead, but repaying the aether is not. Tell me, my small but loyal group of internet friends: How can we help her?

Location: home, this whole @#$@# week
Mood: still unhappy
Music: All the lonely people. Where do they all come from?
Subscribe!

Categories
business personal

Red Belt – The biggest human temptation is to settle for too little

Lottery tickets

Me: It’s 9:15 PM. Would it be crazy for me to run out and buy some lottery tickets?
Her: Do it. You’ve had a great week so far.

Last week, wrapped up several projects that I’ve been working on for months.

Then at 9PM last night, found out that another project I was working on came through AND I got a completely unsolicited five-star Vine Voice Review for The Men Made of Stone saying it was a Damn Good Novel.

For those of you that don’t know, a Vine Voice is an invitation-only accolade from Amazon that is for “the most trusted reviewers on Amazon.”

Between that and the Olympics last night, could barely sleep. Speaking of accolades and people with great weeks, watched as swimmers Dana Vollmer and Brendan Hansen broke two world records.

In my insomnia last night, thought of Sir Roger Bannister, the first person in recorded history to run a four minute mile.

Also thought of pancakes but that’s neither here nor there.

In any case, the thing about Bannister is that he could only train 45 minutes a day because he was studying to be a neurologist – in fact, he’s the author of the book on nervous system diseases.

This other fella named Pedro Valente Jr. is one of ten people on the planet that has a red belt (aka a 9th degree black belt) in Brazilian Jiu Jitsu. That’s impressive enough. However, he’s also recognized by the New York Times as one of the top 5 plastic surgeons on the planet.

And, if you’re a long time reader of this blog, you know my idolization of Heady Larmarr who was not only a gorgeous film actress but also an inventor that patented the frequency-hopping technology we use in today’s mobile phones.

These people’re my idols cause they show that one can excel at numerous disparate things. They dispel the myth that one can be the best at only one thing, if anything at all.

It’ll take time, but I think I can be King of two things and Jack of four things. Put another way: The biggest human temptation is to settle for too little and these are people that refused to settle.

Or to quote yet another philosopher named Eminem:

Yo I won’t tell no lie, not a moment goes by
That I don’t pray to the sky, please I’m beggin you God
Please don’t let me be pigeon holed in no regular job
Yo I hope you can hear me homey wherever you are

———-

Lottery tickets

If you haven’t picked up a copy of my book yet, here’s the first ~60 pages of it just to see what you think:

Location: home
Mood: ambitious
Music: got every ingredient, all I need is the courage
Subscribe!

Categories
personal

That’s not what I call myself

Me: Have you seen my keys?
Her: (glancing up) They’re right there on the dresser.
Me: What would I do without you?
Her: (looking back down) Probably walk around in circles.

Hoping to catch the new Batman flick.

Was in the tail end of college when Batman: The Animated Series came out. Being the geek I am, still caught most episodes.

One episode stuck in my mind, which was recently alluded to in this article and part of that episode’s below.

What they don’t show you is at the very end of the story (or maybe another episode), Bruce Wayne is asked how he knew that he wasn’t going crazy.

He replies that the voices in his head kept calling him Bruce.

“That’s not what I call myself,” he said.

A man is as he believes. Since I’ve gotten married, what I believe of myself has changed slightly – expanded, mainly. But I still keep who I actually think I am to myself.

I will say, though, that in my head, I think I’m someone.

Just got into the Apple iTunes/iBook Store! So if you have an iPad, iPod, or iPhone, download a copy of The Men Made of Stone.
The Men Made of Stone - Logan Lo Also, another post rant on Friday.

Location: between fast asleep and wide awake
Mood: focused
Music: They call me Adam Yauch, but I’m MCA.
Subscribe!

Categories
personal

Honesty and politeness are (very) different things

Me: Do you want me to be honest or polite?
Him: Honest.
Me: If that’s the case, then the truth is that: Unless you make it to an ivy league or top tier one, it just doesn’t pay to go to law school any more.

Hazel asked me to chat with a friend of her’s the other day.

What a lotta people don’t realize is that honesty and politeness are two very different – and usually, opposite – things. Consider some scenarios:

You’re rushing out the door and someone’s walking in.
Honest: If you’re honest with yourself, you’d want to head out first.
Polite: You let the other person in first.

Your friend’s in a play and you think it’s terrible.
Honest: You tell him he should stick to accounting.
Polite: You tell him that he has promise.

As for the conversation I had, it wasn’t the most pleasant one I’ve had in my life. He just got out of a messy marriage, lost his job, and law school was one of the few bright spots in his horizon.

But it was just a bright spot in his mind.

It wasn’t a first, second, or even a third tier law school. Moreover, he was getting zero financial aid. It would be a $150,000, three-year black hole.

Me: I once fought tooth-and-nail to get this company started – after two rejections – so that I could do it with a close family friend. I finally got it and I was so psyched.
Him: And?
Me: Well, the family friend ended up stealing all my scratch and I spent the next three years of my life just to end up at zero. Sometimes you spend all your time fighting for something without realizing what you’re actually fighting for.

Conversations with strangers remind me that I’m barely running close to schedule.

 

Location: in front of spreadsheets
Mood: slightly cooler
Music: If you ask me how I’m doing I would say I’m doing just fine
Subscribe!

Categories
personal

Good days and bad days

Zebra stripes in NYC

Her: Let’s see what our fortune cookie says. (opens it) “Knowledge is power.” That’s not a fortune, that’s an observation!

Spent most of last week working 16 hours days. Which, during times of personal upheaval, is not necessarily a bad thing.

Think that the subconscious is always processing those things that we can’t or won’t deal with at the moment.

Then again, being an insomniac, always somehow find the time to dwell on things I probably shouldn’t dwell on for too long. All those damn hows and whys.

If you’re at all interested, there’s a story in the bible that gives me comfort in life: 2 Samuel 12:14-23.

David, the king, has a son who gets sick. While the kid’s dying, David’s distraught and won’t sleep or eat. Then the kid dies. David mourns but then rises from his knees and gets something to eat. His advisers don’t understand and say: “When he was sick, you were a mess, and now that he’s gone, you’re eat again.”

To which David goes, “He’s gone and I can’t bring him back. I shall go to him, but he shall not return to me.”

Saw my buddy, whose mamma passed away, at the gym. He seems like he’s back to himself. That’s the thing with personal loss, y’have your good days and bad.

Since the beginning of time, all you can do is get up off your knees, ride out the bad days and wait for the next good day. You try to make it to the other side of the crap and get something nice to eat.

Today I start my day with a muffin – which, let’s face it, is really just a naked cupcake. Every once in a while, you should start your day with some cake.

Hoping today’s a good day. Even if it’s not, it starts with some cake.

Mom: Can I do something? Maybe I’ll get you two something.
Me: Well, you could buy us a 55″ LCD TV. That always makes things better.
Her: Really?
Me: (laughing) No mom, I was just kidding. (pause) 60 inches is really the minimum.

Location: in front of my pistachio muffin
Mood: better
Music: Hey, my friend, It seems your eyes are troubled
Subscribe!

Categories
personal

Bearing it

Took the bike from my pad on the UWS to my gym on 27th street twice over the weekend.

The first time I did it, it was harrowing. Then on the way back, it was a little less so. And even less the next day.

There’s this saying that I’m sure I’m going to mangle but it goes something like this: There is no situation that you cannot bear if you see those around you bearing it.

When you read things that people have done – trench warfare, the D-day invasion, Thermopoylae – it does seem to explain a lot.

After a couplea large buses whizzed past me, was thinking: What the hell am I doing? Until this little old lady puttered past me.

Laughed at myself as she went by.

Course, there’re times when there’s no laughter and all the bravery you can muster isn’t enough cause it’s something that truly puts you on your knees.

A buddy has a sick family member who’s not going to get better. These are hard words to hear and, obviously, much harder to say.

And there’s never really much to say to someone that tells you such things, just a lotta goddamn nodding. Wish I could offer him more than my condolences and a pat on the back.

In my head, though, I know he’s tough. I know that he’ll overcome the blow even if he doesn’t know it himself. And I wish them all peace.

Later that weekend, I sit in the back of my church and think about all those how and whys.

And then I come home and make some calls for no particular reason.

Him: Hey! How are you?
Me: I’m good, dad. Just thought I’d call. Oh, I bought a bike…

Location: a magical place called Staten Island
Mood: busy
Music: got to push on through but while I’m gone
Subscribe!

Categories
personal

The things no one can ever take from me

As a spur-of-the-moment thing, bought myself and the wife a set of bicycles. Haven’t had one for maybe 20 years?

Y’know that old saying: It’s just like riding a bike? That’s totally true.

Anywho, we took the bikes out for a quick spin and … I promptly got a flat tire. Nuthin horrendous. Just annoying. As is my luck – I’m certain I’m darned.

Getting back to the flat tire, came across a nice fella named “House” (no kidding) and he lent me his pump. Didn’t work but still appreciated the assist. He told me to check out TreadHunter.com as they have tons of tips or “hacks” to fix my tire, he was a helpful fellow.

On the (long) walk home, thought about that saying above.

Yes, I value knowledge above all else. But within knowledge, I value a particular type of knowledge above all other knowledge.

Somewhere in my muscles and medulla oblongata’s knowledge that’s forever mine – how to ride a bike, do a parry/thrust, or this weird thing called a rubber guard – all things that no one can take from me. Or at least highly unlikely.

One day my body’ll betray me, I know. But that’s me taking it away. Until then, always looking for more of that kinda stuff. Partly cause I think it’s cool, secretly cause I’m greedily possessive of such things.

Oddly though, it makes me no less clumsy.

Her: (CRASH) What happened now?
Me: Spent the last 15 minutes making waffles with bananas to go with my coffee and I just dropped the whole thing on the floor.

———-

Speaking of darned, one of my bathroom showers completely stopped working so had to call in a plumber. I installed a fancy new showerhead for my when my girlfriend is staying over that she ordered from ShowerHeadly – after her hassling me about it for 3 months, and now she can’t even use it. It’s always something.

Anyway, lemme tell you, as a lawyer, I don’t charge anything close to what a plumber charges.

Totally made the wrong career decisions in my life.

Location: running to HomeDepot to get a different shower-head
Mood: crazy stressed, yo
Music: girls they’ll be riding today so look out
Subscribe!

Categories
personal

Burn all them bridges down, to the ground, cause I won’t be coming this way again

UWS NYC

Him: So – y’think you’re back on your feet finally?
Me: (thinking) Yeah. I do.
Him: Good. (raises a weapon) Let’s go.
Me: (laughing and raising my sword) En garde.

Been spending my days with my nose to the grind and working like mad. Spending nights with my favourite person.

An old friend of mine crossed my mind today. We had some good times but he ended up being a different person; I’m sure he thinks the same of me. But in the end – like so many others – that relationship wasn’t worth the time and effort.

Thought about all of people that have come in and out of Venn Diagram. The people and relationships I cut, the boats and bridges I’ve burned.

They say never burn any bridges, but I say sometimes you gotta burn all them bridges down, to the ground, cause you won’t be coming this way again.

And the bridges and people I got left earned their spot in my life as I hope I’ve in theirs.

Got my pad, my people, my poison, and my person. I’m sickeningly content.

And boy, have I got stories to tell you. I’ll tell you one Wednesday tomorrow.

Me: I’m good at convincing people to do things they wouldn’t want to do normally.
Her: Well, you convinced me to marry you.

Location: AC Hotel lobby in Malaga, Spain
Mood: thoughtful
Music: I’ve got friends and they’ve got my back
Subscribe!